Peace of mind
#1
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(--) WC: 342/ OOC: Eclipse will not be hostile nor will she be so overbearingly depressed. Smile


Eclipse was still in a shock. She couldn’t believe what happened. It all seemed too fast but the whole thing, the scenario was all too slow... the feeling was surreal to her. Robert had done as he promised, something that shocked her by anything else in her whole lifetime. It was significant enough that she would cherish and remember the man for his attempts to keep her company, happy and well fed. She didn’t want to eat the first few days but then hunger itself made her go for something. It had given her strength. He had been by her side the whole time though he left every once in a while to do what he needed to do.

Eclipse liked him by her side, she felt secure, and that if it weren’t for him she wouldn’t be alive right now because she knew she would have more than likely committed suicide so not to see the death of her puppies. She was recovering though and she didn’t think about that, she was a bit happier today, though she was still surreally silent. She sat on her porch sitting in the rocking chair that was furnished with the house and sat rocking back and forth watching the streets in front of her. Her eyes were glazed over a bit, but she was no longer crying. That was a big step for the woman because at first it was hard to stop, now she just felt she had no more tears and there were better ways to mourn her children. One was to get better and live life so that when she met them in the afterlife she could tell them all she did, and she would find ways to let them know that they touched her heart even though they were never able to breath the same air as her without the help of her womb. She rocked back and forth, the motion making her feel better, soothed her, calmed her mind, and she hoped Robert would come back soon.

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Table by Kite/Aly
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#2
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Hopefully it's okay he knows?
I wasn't sure how quickly news would spread...
Just wanted to reply to this so it wasn't lonely anymore. <33


There seemed to be a curse on the youth of Cercatori d’Arte—no, he refused to think of curses. He reasoned that nature had simply chosen a time and place to hand out all its nasty tricks, all the underhanded ways it stole life from those who’d barely begun to breathe, and the merchant pack was simply a breeding grounds for those tricks. With all the litters born recently—or almost born—it didn’t surprise him that disaster would rear its ugly head…but it worried him. He was, at the heart, superstitious, and as a father he could not help but draw a parallel between everything that had happened and his own two precious children, their eyes open and their spirits restless. They were so alive, nothing should be able to touch them.

Levent told himself that, standing outside his home and rubbing the bandages on his shoulder. He spared a glance at the hut on the other side of the street, wondering if the children were sleeping or giving their mother a hard time. He half wanted to go and see, but there were many others in the pack he could spend his time with, too. He realized that he cared about them, even if he didn’t know them well—Keldava, Dalgina, Vasiliy, Eclipse…

The man frowned and looked at the young woman’s hut. He was surprised to see her figure on the porch, and made an effort to walk in that direction. He didn’t know what he could say to her, but the merchant was nothing if not good at improvising.

Levent lifted his head and smiled as he crossed the cobblestone road, approaching the porch of the small house and making a point to give Eclipse the absolute brightest, warmest grin he could. “Merhaba, tatlı,” he greeted gently, leaning slightly on one of the wooden posts, his atrocious posture making him look small. He avoided asking if she was okay—what a ridiculous question, he couldn’t imagine she’d feel like she’d ever be okay—and only continued to smile, lending whatever happiness he could to her.


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#3
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(300) OOC: The stage of the in between is hard to play, but I think I can! Big Grin


She saw him coming towards her but it barely registered in her mind, she was off somewhere, possibly a place she should not be, but it was not her fault really, she was trying to stay together. His strange language made her look over at him and remembered vaguely who he was. She met him before when she was out in the fields with her horses, he was a nice enough man and was cheerful, helped her feel like a part of the pack itself.

“Levant, hello, come sit, how have you been? I have not seen you in a while.” She said. She now felt so established here yet here he was finding her in the same position she was when she first came.... lost. Now it was because she lost something that could have been so close. Like her father, she was scared, but Robert did his best to comfort her and he was doing a good job. He was keeping his promise with her. It was nice. She did give the man a mechanical smile, one that was there to appease him, but it was not her true smile, that she did not show for some time since the birth of her children. “I feel bad for not visiting before, you are a friend and we barely talked to each other.” She said. She did know why he was here, to give her comfort which was helping enough just by talking even though his only words she did not know. It mattered little she was not feeling sorry for herself but for the life her children could not have. It was heartbreaking, but she really was not trying to dwell on it, even though that was exactly what she was doing.

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Table by Kite/Aly
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#4
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Poor Eclipse! :C
And Lev is being a stupid liarface but with good intentions. <3


The young woman greeted him warmly enough, and Levent let his smile broaden as if he was absolutely charmed by her invitation. It was not an alarming grin, but a soft one carefully tuned toward those in a fragile state of mind. He’d met enough distraught strangers on the road to know how to appear to them, and while it was definitely manipulation, he believed that using it during sensitive times was good rather than evil.

He hopped onto the porch, settling down beside her and scowling slightly at his bandaged shoulder when it complained about the movement. “I am doing well,” he replied, “although I have been a bit busy. A merchant needs to rove around a bit to find goods to trade, so I’ve been outside the territory more often than not.” The lie came smoothly, because it was made of two truths tied together to imply something that was not the truth. He did range far and wide looking for any trinkets left over from human or luperci settlements, and he had been outside of d’Arte lately, but the reasons were far different.

He shook his head as she apologized. “We’ve all been busy,” he said with a dismissive shrug, but he knew he should have done more on his end to visit his pack mates, too. However, most of them were second to his family, even if that was a bit selfish, and he’d spent more time delving into his own affairs than paying attention to his comrades’. Perhaps it was a good thing; it’d spared him from feeling their pain as much as he would have. He was a coward.

“Good to know we’re friends, though,” Levent added, winking playfully at her. “Had I known you didn’t see me as just ‘that Turkish guy,’ I would have graced you with gifts. Although it’s not too late for that.”


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#5
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(314) OOC: she called him out OH NOOOO!! Tongue


His news was good to her ears and she let a bigger smile slip before going back to a polite one; “That sounds nice, did you find anything of interest?” She asked she salvaged, mostly for cooking ware but she found some nice things when she was out. She nodded at his obvious comment, not wishing to elaborate as she wasn’t all that busy at all. She had her chores, but she did mostly exploration of the forest around them before her miscarriage and hunting. Lately she stayed home where she was more comforted with Robert around her and she wasn’t going to make him leave often. Soon she would be back to her normal self, where she could be happy without thinking of the loss of her pups.

She continued to rock as she was once again reminded of her pups, out of the blue and she wanted to look strong to him though his words made her shake her head; “You have always treated me with kindness, that means you will be my friend for as long as you want to.” She said, her tone reassuring; “But I assure you I don’t need any gifts.” She said and felt her throat constrict. She cleared her throat and made herself swallow and rocked harder, making the chair move a little faster, the motion doing its calming therapy on her battered body. “Did you come here for a visit or is it because you heard about … about my.” She stopped mid sentence, knowing she would lose it. She had no tears to cry but she wasn’t going to risk it, but she just wanted to break the ice as she knew mostly why he’d come. She did not wonder, however if he would have ignored her if she did not have the miscarriage.

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#6
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N'aww.


The man hesitated when she asked about what he’d salvaged. He was wary of any trigger words, not sure how deeply the woman was still grieving for what was no doubt a unfathomably tragic experience. “Mostly toys, some shiny things for trading,” he said, diverting attention away from the first in the list with a grin and a flourish. “I’ve told you before that I was a merchant in Eurasia before I ever came to this continent. The voyage we took to the northern packs really helped me remember why.” Whether or not what he received in return was worth it was up for debate, but he knew he’d at least use the map to search for more goods, and the horse could be trained even if he had to bring her to an expert to break her of her bad habits.

The tawny she-wolf rocked slightly, and he rested his arms on his knees, staring into his hands and pretending not to notice her behavior. It seemed that, despite his best intentions, she was going back into the place he’d hoped to bring her from, at least for a moment. He could be an extremely sensitive individual, but he had too many goddamn problems to help her through hers the way she needed to be helped—but he’d try. His face grew solemn as she choked out a question, ending it abruptly, and he reached over to wrap a cream-fingered hand around hers.

“Both,” Levent said firmly, his washed-out blue eyes darting to her purple-tinged ones. “Both,” he repeated, and shook his head. “I won’t ask you to talk about what you don’t want to talk about, Eclipse. I want to be here for you regardless, but you’re a friend to me and I need to visit my friends no matter what’s going on in our lives.” He smiled gently. “Friends are hard to come by but harder to keep—that I’ve learned from seasons on the road. I was on the trade routes for so long, I never got a chance to sit down with someone and actually connect without being whisked away because of my schedule. I want to actually do that this time.”




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#7
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WC:341 OOC:


She could tell he was trying hard to keep from reminding her of her own pups. He didn’t have to worry for they were always on her mind. She knew they could not play with any toys they couldn’t even see the sun ever. She shook her head; “It sounds like you got a good few things then. Hopefully you can trade for other things if need be.” Eclipse did not know that Hotaru’s little one’s were also Levants as well. She was just happy he was doing well and she beamed when he spoke of his love for trading and that he found it again during the voyage in the ship that was docked over near the fields.

His words were exactly what she needed to hear and she nodded; “It still hurts to think about them, but please do not be careful because the mother wanted my children back early.” She was using the term of the god that Razekiel taught her about, it was all she knew and all she believed in for now She knew that there was greater meaning to all; “I may have been too young or it was because I was sick, but I cannot keep grieving for children lost when Hotaru has her children and Skye will have hers soon. It is not the end of the world. I will have more.” She said, making to reassure him as well as herself. “I am glad I have you as a friend. What else has been going on? Have you met Hotaru’s puppies yet?” SHe had not. The only news that came to her was that the puppies were born before Eclipse’s own and they were healthy little things. Even Jace’s pups, though she didn’t think about it until now were well. But Jace was in a position that made it hard to think if the puppies were ok when she attacked someone else. Eclipse did not know the full details on that herself
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#8
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Lev loves his chil'ens. :c


Levent grinned at mention of trading, and he had no doubt he’d be able to do so. It still took some work to understand the psyche of these more feral canines compared to the cultures of Europe and Asia, but he knew with a little more practice he’d be able to acquire manifold things for himself and the pack. Of course, not all of those trades would be very fair if he had anything to say about it, but he had loose morals when it came to such things. He didn’t tell her that, of course, instead opting to describe the voyage before the conversation turned to a darker topic.

Eclipse managed to hold herself together as she replied, and the man wondered at her spirit as she tried to speak optimistically. He nodded in agreement, the gentle smile spreading over his features again. “You can help care for the other pack puppies in the meantime,” he suggested warmly, “and you’ll learn how much of a handful they can be so you’ll be prepared when you do have more.” He wasn’t sure if these were the right words, exactly, but experience would help her cope. He knew some females had reproductive troubles, and that some sort of healer might be able to tell, but he would pray that her first miscarriage remained her last. Until then, he would believe fully that she’d become a mother in due time, once she was ready to pursue such a thing again.

The tawny-furred girl asked a couple of other questions, and Levent grinned a huge, proud, awkward grin when she talked about Hotaru’s puppies. “I—ah, they’re wonderful, and they’re—” He rubbed the back of his neck. “They’re mine,” he admitted, still grinning. “I’d absolutely love for you to meet them; I’d bring them out to you, but Hotaru would have my tail if I take them outside again without her knowing.” He glowed as a father should, almost forgetting the hardships they’d spoken of earlier. “We have two,” he added, “a boy and a girl. Aiden looks just like his mom and baba, and Aysun is pale as moonlight. You have to meet them, maybe when they’re more mobile?” His tail wagged.





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#9
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(344) OOC:


She gave him a sad smile as he spoke of the other packs pups and how she would learn from them and she knew she would as she had learned from her own puppies demise. She knew now that she would be more prepared just with the experience she had that she’d already learned a good deal. The thoughts just kept creeping up on her, but she pushed them away as she continued to listen to Levant.

At first he seemed tongue tied about her mentioning Hotaru’s puppies. She gave him her best smile, though it wasn’t as bright as normal, it was still a happy one and her tail wagged; “I did not know, I am very glad for you. Congratulations.” Of course the spirit of her normal words would have brought nothing but joy running through her him and any other passerby, but this was not a joy filled happiness, there was joy though and she let it show, her tail was moving back and forth as he offered for her to see them. “I would very much like to meet your children. When I am allowed to walk freely again, I will visit.” She said with a smile. She did not nor would not tell anyone about her excursion to see Aro who had called for her at the borders only a few days after. She was sure everyone knew about it anyway, but it had made her sore, to walk there, cry thousands of tears and make her way back, even though she just wanted to sleep under a tree that night. She was told it would be a few weeks before she should leave the house and wander around just because of the trauma she went through mentally and physically, she doubted she would see that order through but it was always best to be subtle about it. “Do they see yet?” She asked curiously. She knew puppies were born blind, so it made her wonder when puppies opened their eyes.

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#10
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He had to grin as she congratulated him; there was little point in him smothering his happiness for her sake when he was very proud of his puppies. He was still sensitive to her emotions, but he knew it might even be worse for her if her pack mates let themselves be gloomy too. There was still life in the pack to celebrate, and for as long as there was that life, there was hope too: and hope for Eclipse. He believed wholeheartedly that Tanrı would grant her a second chance and that it was all a part of His plan for her; he had to believe, or he knew both of them would probably go crazy.

Eclipse mentioned being allowed to walk free, but he didn’t let his puzzlement touch his features as he returned her smile and nodded eagerly. Was she on some sort of house arrest for the sake of her mental health? It made sense, though it was depressing to think about. He pushed the thought out of his mind and said, “I look forward to it.”

Levent nodded again at her question, smiling proudly. “They do,” he answered, and chuckled. “And they like to look at everything; I can only imagine what life will be like when they’re mobile enough to do something about it.”



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#11
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(351) OOC: we can end this after you post if you want :3


She was glad to see his grin, that he was happy and proud of his pups, she doubted he wouldn’t be they were sure to be cute as any puppy would be. She would have her own someday, but this time it wasn’t so. She would be happy for those who had their own litters. She knew there would be another time where she will have her own children, but it was still hard that the ones she had were so big when they came out. She was on rest because of the traumatic birth, and that she tore a little when birthing the pups and the afterbirth, she would be about in a few days but he didn’t need to know that about her. She was just too sore still both physically and mentally to go far from her home.

He answered her question and she gave a small smile, thinking of Levant puppies with wide open eyes on small heads and smaller bodies. She wished she could just up and go now, but the energy just wasn’t there. “Oh I think you of all wolves can keep up with them. I am sure you and Hotaru will be able to keep them out of trouble well enough.” She said. She closed her eyes for a second, then oppened them after a light pause, not sure what to say. It was nice just to have the company but with things so tense, so sad, she didn’t know how to put on a good mood for too long. Her own hopelessness would come back soon and she did not want to cry in front of him. “Have you heard of Skye? Robert hasn’t left, how is she and her puppies? I do not know when they are due, but I do hope they will be well.” She said... puppies again. That was the biggest subject in this pack. there had been three pregnant women, one who gave birth oone about ready, and one who had to let hers go and give them to the earth.

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