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She knew it was the afternoon, because although winter was cold enough to creep inside the walls of Haven Mansion, she could feel the warmth of the sun against her back. Light was muted from behind her eyelids as she lingered between dreaming and the dark chasm of true, dreamless sleep. And, feeling a familiar warmth wrapped around her back, she struggled to stay in that place in her mind with soft edges, muted colors, and vague images. Sighing, she turned toward the source of that warmth, burying her face against a familiar heartbeat.
"I dreamed of you again," she murmured.
"You're dreaming of me now."
His voice was so clear in her mind. She could feel the rumble of it in his chest, the warmth of his breath against her shoulder as he reached to run his fingers through her hair and down her back. She screwed her eyes shut tightly to keep light from invading the insides of her eyelids. If this was indeed a dream, she didn’t want it to end. Not yet.
She felt his hand come to rest on her cheek. She leaned in to that touch, curling her own fingers into his ribs, bringing her arms around him to hold the small of his back. ”Open your eyes,” he prompted.
She shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut tightly. ”Geneva, I want you to look at me. Is that so much to ask?” His voice was gentle, teasing, coaxing. Geneva shook her head and pressed her face against his body. ”I promise you I haven’t gotten too terribly ugly,” he teased, running his fingers along the side of her face.
”I don’t want to open my eyes,” she mumbled against his neck, digging her fingers desperately, almost roughly into his back to make sure he stayed solid with her.
”Why not?” he prompted.
”I want you to stay,” she whispered, pulling him against her, almost to the point of pain.
He reached behind his back and caught one of her hands in his own, moving his fingers to circle her small wrist. He pulled her hand to his mouth and laid a gentle kiss on her palm. ”I promise to stay a little while.”
She moved slowly, turning her face out of the space between his neck and his shoulder. She turned her face until she could feel his breath on her face and blinked open her eyes. It took a moment, and she blinked once more to bring his face into focus. The sight of him floored her.
She could see his face clearly in her memories, and her thoughts lingered on him everyday. Still, it was stunning to see him in front of her eyes instead of behind them. Even prone, she could make out the proud arch of his neck, the quiet intelligence in his yellow eyes. The smile on his face would have brought her to her knees if she had been standing. ”Jordan.”
He smiled and nodded, curling his hand behind her neck to better look into her face. ”I promised I’d never leave you."
She stared at him, dry-eyed. She felt tears pricking the backs of her eyes, but fought them off. She didn't want anything to cloud her vision at this moment, refusing to blink as air stung her eyes. He just smiled, giving her neck a small squeeze. There weren't any words. But she didn't need them.
Geneva's face was expressive. She wore every emotion in plain sight. But she had never been able to hide anything from him anyway. He knew her inside and out.
"Gennie, I need you--" he said.
"Jordan, I need you too. I--I don't know. Some days are so hard to take."
"I know," he said, passing his fingers down her back. "Geneva, I need you to--"
But then the light burst from behind him, swallowing him whole. She felt it burn her eyes, and reached blindly for him as she felt him disappear. "No, no!" she called out, struggling to move against the gravity of the dream. Lime green eyes flew open to survey the dim gloom of the muted winter light coming in from under the curtains. She swung her legs out, sitting up from where she had fallen asleep on the sofa. The book she had been reading had fallen to the floor.
She clenched her hands together, resting her head on her fists. "Anything," she whispered. "I'll give you anything." Please come back.
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oh is this for me?? & happy valentines day!
Paws dipped into the basin of icy water. Fingertips touched the waters surface and breaking the solid and smooth calm it held. They carved the way for her palms, guiding them into the waters depth. The sudden cold sent a chill up her arms, clearing her head as it hit her temples and cleansing her thoughts. With fluid though quick motions she rid her paws of the blood that laced them. The clear water turned murky in an instance, her presence tainting its core. Blue orbs watched as she cleaned her hands, ridding them of more then just the red substance. It had been a soul lifting night, hunting with the new pack mate and being able to provide for her family. Having taken what she and her friend had left of their kill to the mansion she went to work as soon as the sun had stood high over the house. The carcass was finally butchered and ready to be stored in the large cellar that held their provisions.
Standing before the large sink her eyes wandered to the window that hung above it. Its panes were newly clean, as were the counters that stood around her. It was a pleasant and accomplished feeling. The fey saw herself as she glanced at the glass, noticing her ragged appearance she looked passed the reflection, and into the ending day. The sun was a broken light, torn by the woods that surrounded them. Its color bled into the ground’s snow cover, tainting it as her paws did the tub. Black hazed cobalt hovered over the setting sun, but instead of over shadowing the exiting light it sat with patience. Waiting until the orange star fully receded to claim its rein in the sky. She used the rag the hung over her shoulder to dry her wet hands. Shaking them slightly she hoped to get the blood flowing again. A smiled formed over the muzzle, with thoughts of night flouting in her head. Thin arms heaved the basin out of the sink, and began the long slow stepped journey to the side door. Her goal set, she stepped carefully, hoping not to spill a drop.
Three steps into the expedition and her ears were drawn backward with the sound of a cry. The large tub hit the ground, its metal clanging throughout the large kitchen. It echoed around her, though her ears were filled with the muffled voice that called through walls and across the mansion. To hurried to be grateful her toes had been spared Anu walked across the wooded floor and out into the hallway that directed her into the living room. Her mouth was a thin line across her face, filled with the serious panic that the voice had invoked within her. It was only when she saw the figure that her mind was cleared of sudden adrenaline, and her movements slowed. Had she always known that it was Geneva that had spoken, it hadn’t even been a scream not for help and she didn’t seem to be hurt. Still the basin lay on its side drifting left and right over its curved edge, water running over the hard floor and pooling in the dent that would forever be left in the wood panel. And still she stood behind the couch, her heart pounded, filling her ears and reminding her that she was still standing the doorway. With smooth strides she was beside the couch, and then a moment later sitting beside the other female.
Silence enveloped her. Anu placed a hand on the others wrist, free of any remnants of blood and light as a feather. Her brow creased, looking at the body that held to much sorrow. Her face was hidden, mane and hands holding onto the window that might show Anu what she was feeling. Wishing to see the eyes that could show Anu how to comfort her, she wasn’t as practiced as the other fey was in the art of consoling. Her voice was calm and solid, but she still couldn’t hide the concern that Anu felt for her. Geneva? 600+
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[html] http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j40/k ... ump/12.png); background-position: top center; background-repeat: no-repeat;"> I ♥ Alli. 500+
There had been a commotion a few rooms away, but Geneva hadn't noticed at all. Instead, she was trapped within the depths of her mind. Memories tangled, twisting together until they blurred into one image. She had her fists pressed tightly against her eyelids, and the vision swimming there was one of Jordan's face. His yellow eyes were bright and flat like coins as his white teeth flashed against the darkness of his coat. I need you to... The words formed on his lips but never reached her ears.
And she never would know what he had said. She would never know what he needed. She felt as though she had failed him all over again. It seemed that in life and in death, she was always just shy of giving him what he needed. She trembled at the precipice, her ears unconsciously quivering as if to capture that last word that would never come from his non-existent mouth.
If Jordan had asked for the moon, she would have found a way to claw it out of the sky. She wanted to know that he was happy, and that the last real moments they had shared on earth wouldn't be their last. She recalled the last time she had seen him, his hands wasted and fragile, his face withered, and his eyes over-bright. She had clutched his hands in her own, feeling as though the bones beneath his skin would crumble to dust if she held on too tightly. And he had muttered those same words in a rasping voice as his lungs rattled in the gasp before death. "I need you to..."
Not knowing what he needed drove her to a dark place. She would have given him anything at that moment. She would have given her own life, her breath, every ounce of her being to carry out whatever he needed or wanted. And although the months had passed, and she had begun to heal, there was no peace for her with the mystery hovering overhead like dark clouds.
She felt a hand curl around her wrist. With a desperate strength, she rotated her wrist and clamped her own hand over the other's wrist. She held on with a quiet desperation, her fingers curling in against the flesh to hold that creature to her. It felt warm, solid in her hand. Stricken lime green eyes rose to meet orbs of blue as she realized that the wrist beneath her fingers had a pulse, a life beat signaling the blood coursing through her veins.
She felt her heartbeat rising in her head to answer that call. She realized that Anu was there, an anchor amidst the wash of sorrow. She realized that Anu was covered in blood and water, but she didn't care. She lurched forward, wrapping her arms around Anu's middle and burying her face in the crook between her neck and shoulder. And she felt her heartbeat where she held her.
"I need you..." the strains of his last belabored breath still whispered through her mind. But this time, he continued, a wheezing, desperate whisper filled with such love she felt her heart would break. "...to live."
"I will," she gasped, whispering through her tears. "I will. I promise." She clung to her friend, spilling her tears against her shoulder.
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this is a jumbled mess....
Life was full of chances, moments that stood before you and waited. For how long varied, some only a second while other hovered and waited for a decision to be made. Each was a blessing; each wanted to be taken, each feeling the need to be chosen. To many times they were over looked, the mind rationalizing beyond necessity and blinding eyes from seeing the very opportunity that stood in plain view. Anu was full of the second and third chances that she never believed she would get, or more so deserved to have. Each time she saw her face, smelt her scent or when her name hung on a passing thought there was another chance. Each one she ignored, blinded by all her reason.
Anu gladly took her in her arms, holding Geneva as she threatened to fall back into the darkness. The picture of her weightless body against the starred night flashed behind her eyes. The mere memory stole the breath from her lungs. Something unknown to the fey pulled her downward into the sorrow Anu was all too familiar. Knowing how it felt to be sinking into a drowning pool, it was easy to pull her close. She refused to let her fall, though her muscles didn’t cling and grasp her in desperation but cradled her softly. The questions placed pressure on her surface, like green buds touching the soils surface, but Anu stifled them.
Whispers, nothing more then hushed words hanging to the quick inhale and exhale of Geneva’s ragged breath came to the female’s ears. Anu let her hand support her back, holding her against the weight of her emotions. Feeling the wetness of the tears that were shed over her fur Anu held her closer and felt her own paws stray to the mane that fell from her crown. What she spoke made little sense at first, though at the same moment told Anu how it wasn’t the end to her sorrow. Letting a moment pass, all the things that Anu thought would comfort her had slipped from her mind. She was empty, so unsure why her kindred spirit felt the pain she did. But Anu had never forgotten, the first moments they met and kept every memory of the seconds they had spent were fresh in her mind. The realization surprised her, how vivid the thoughts truly were.
She looked to them to give her the answers. The only moment that Anu could remember Geneva showing the weakness that radiated from her body was the day they first spoke. They had spoken of fate, how it was written how their lives would play out. Did she always know that fate was what brought them together? Her own words rang in her head, and the ones the wolfess had spoken brought light into the dim room. She knew, though unsure exactly how or why, Anu knew whom her promise was to.
Still she could only touch lightly upon the wound, He hears you. As the words passed her lips Anu thought she would second guess them, feel that they would need hope to make them what Geneva needed to hear and that Anu was right about all of this. Never had Anu seem such sadness in her like when Geneva spoke about him. Anu tried not to hated him, for bring such pain into Geneva’s heart. Wished he would come back, so that she would no longer hold such unhappiness in his memory. And he loves you Like I do. He did, in life and in death.
Her voice was low, no more then a whisper and still it held strength and the ferocity that her pounding heart rang through her veins. There was no doubt in her statement, if he had met her he loved her. If she had given an inch of what she had given Anu, then he loved her. Anu felt it as she lanced her fingers with the fur that fell over Geneva’s shoulders. If he had ever held her, then he loved her. And such a love would never end.
600+
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"I'm a mess, I guess. It's what I've asked for. It's what I've needed. Well, you know me better than that. Or at least you did, then something happened. Once again, something's happened. The confidence you held in us, the rope we almost hung ourselves with. At times I wonder if we ever took the steps to break right through it. I know that there were better days, but to see the light and to feel the rays. Life was always back and forth, and we were idling or making useless progress." ♥
Geneva leaned into Anu, the desperation in her hands melting away as she cried herself out against her shoulder. The beating of her heart beneath her warm skin brought Geneva back around. She swallowed once, hard, and felt the salt of her tears fresh on her tongue. Her vision was still blurred and her breathing was muffled. She broke away from her friend slowly, her arms coming free and she passed one over her eyes to scrub the tears away.
Her eyes were still slick, gleaming as she blinked. She paused to run her fingers around her cheeks, finding her face damp. She knew without looking that her nose was wet and had begun to run too. She looked away, embarrassed, and stood up suddenly. Avoiding looking at Anu directly, she crept from the room in long strides, making her way to the hallway.
An old-fashioned, heavily gilded mirror hung on the wall. She stumbled over to it, peering at herself in the old, silvered glass. With time, the mirror had warped so slightly, and things reflected in its surface were slightly slanted. She peered into her reflection. Lime green eyes wet with tears looked back, her light gray fur slightly discolored from the tracks of her tears. The look on her face was so lost.
She felt disgust curling in her stomach, a dark, black bubble rising to her throat. She passed her forearm over her eyes and nose, jerking it away to stare into the warped glass again. A wolfess with a hard expression looked back at her, lime green eyes flat, and hard. She didn't recognize the expression on her face. Though she hadn't seen her reflections many times, or ever pondered it before, the muscles in her face that arranged that expression felt underused.
She turned on her heel, feeling slightly lighted yet dizzy at the same time. She was tired, so tired of feeling lost. She was tired of standing at a constant crossroads. For months, she had been standing at one with Jordan. But Jordan was dead and gone, cold in his grave no matter how solid and real his phantasm felt to her. Geneva still loved him with every fiber of her being, but it was time to lay him to rest.
She walked into the living room, not stopping until she stood opposite where Anu was seated. She looked calmer than she felt. She regarded the blue-eyed wolfess coolly, tracing her eyes over her form. She was wet, she realized, covered in what looked like water and blood. Geneva wondered what she must have been doing before she had run in to find her. She didn't realize she had been screaming before.
She felt resolve fall over her like a curtain, although she felt her heart was breaking. Because as much as she wanted to let all the things between them be, flourish and thrive with each tiny glimpse of light they could allow, she couldn't. Because she was standing at a crossroads with Anu too.
Live. He wanted her to live. And she realized that she wanted to too, so desperately that she hadn't realized it before.
"Anu." When she said her name, the expression on her face softened. She swallowed once, then continued, the words coming in a rush before she could lose her courage. "You know I love you. And I do - but the intensity of it...to have you so close..." She shook her head, trying to find the words. "You're a mother and a mate. I'm a widow." She looked into Anu's face, her eyes filled with equal parts resolution and pain. "...this is more than I can bear. I'm not certain I should feel this way now - I feel as though...Jordan, as if...as if I hadn't even let him even grow cold in his grave when I met you."
Geneva knew what she wanted, and knew that it was sacrilege to even think of it. Still, as she listened to the thunder of her own heartbeat in her chest, as she felt the hope dying there, she wanted to live. She wanted to live her life completely, to step out of the shadows. And although Anu was one ray of sunshine to hold in her hand, she would never ask her to make that choice. "I need time," she whispered.
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Arms held her. Her chest would have engulfed Geneva’s their hearts melting into one, their sorrow meshing and weaving until neither knew why they cried. Until there was no more pain at all, and until it there was nothing left, but one beating heart, pumping and pushing their live blood to all the corners of their being. A single, solitary, whole heart.
Anu was left, watching as the other female broke away. Still a hand had reached into her chest, holding onto the heart that beat so furiously behind her ribcage. Even as she walked away, its fingers cradled what Anu held within. Eyes didn’t follow, unsure where Geneva was going but sure that it had ended. Once she had hope, prayed that the end would be near. That the notion of her name, her sent that mere thought of her delicate wrist didn’t make her want to fall to the ground in give up breathing. But it didn’t, Anu couldn’t help, but looked back. Seeing Geneva only looking in the hallway mirror.
The female returned to stand before her, looking over Anu as Anu looked over her. Her face was damp, the fur of it slicked oddly and matted to her cheek bones. The were delicate, more so then Anu had ever noticed. She was beautiful. Anu stood, though her legs were weak as Geneva spoke, feeling the pain that radiated from her. She knew the love that was felt, feeling it too. It was so different, alive pulsing through her so wildly that she didn’t know how to describe it. It wasn’t Naniko, it wasn’t the children it wasn’t the sun or anything else that Anu had believed she loved. It was Geneva. It scared her, sent chills down her spine and made her heart oddly calm and quiet, but at the same time untamed and fierce.
Eyes met her as she rose. Wanting to reach out to her, Anu reframed. Until that moment, Geneva had been the one to draw the line in the sand. Now she tried. Standing still, Anu felt the shaking of her hand. Clenching her fingers into a fist she lowered her face to the ground. Thinking of all things that Geneva believed she was, Anu shook her head. She was nothing. Not when she thought back to all the things that happened, all the feelings that ran through her without even trying to stop them.
She was nothing.
Geneva was everything
The last three words made Anu look back. She oddly understood, how time could help and how it would smother the fire. It would be ashes, black soot with a small stream of smoke billowing from the colorless embers. You... Her voice cracked, stopping her from finishing. She swallowed, and breathed until her voice returned. I’ll give you anything. Her voice was low, filled with tears that had crept up on her. Blinking them away, knowing that she had to be the strong one Anu missed how strong Geneva always had been. She looked at the eyes that were glazed with the tears of her passed mate. Anu didn’t want to hurt her, and it was more the hell at the thought that she did.
I’ll go. Anu spoke again, her voice growing stronger. Her head screamed, pounding as harshly as her heart did. The fingers that held it kept it form ripping through its cage. And, and stay away, if you want me to. Her words were an offering, pure and full of the solemn feeling that Anu held. They were no threat, and nothing in them hinted towards it. Anu didn’t know what else to offer her. She would leave. Because she wasn’t any of those things that Geneva had said, she could go.
Just tell me what to do, because I never want to hurt you. It was suddenly the most important thing, the most important act. More then anything. Nothing mattered, nothing but Geneva’s heart, and the pain that it was holding had her name written on it. It was wrong that Anu could ever do such a thing. But she wouldnt, wouldnt take a step unless pushed. 500+
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Geneva stood in silence, her hands balled into fists by her sides. It took every ounce of her control not to take all those words back. It was funny how the words that held the most truth stung the most leaving her mouth. She ground her back teeth together to keep from opening her mouth to take them all back. She kept her knees locked to keep herself from falling to the floor to ask forgiveness. Her body was composed of hard, harsh lines, vertical and unyielding as the truth in her words. She stood upright as those words, feeling far more fragile than she let on.
She noticed how Anu held a fist to her heart, clenched as though to keep pieces of it from pouring out. She looked on, her eyes hard and her tongue locked down inside her mouth to keep from betraying her wavering resolve. Standing still, her heart so incredibly and absurdly calm, pounding out a harsh rhythm one fierce beat at a time, Geneva didn't know how she kept herself from flying apart.
The image of Anu's clenched fist would stay with her, would follow her into dreams. She imagined that she had wounded the blue-eyed woman, and bit the insides of her mouth to keep herself from asking if she had. But she couldn't take her eyes away. She had brought this on, maybe they both had. She felt like a comet hurtling toward a black hole. She couldn't fight the gravity. Neither of them could.
Anu's words brought her up short, left her gasping for breath. She moved then, one tentative, hurried, unthought-out step toward the woman. She didn't know what she was doing, what she wanted to do at that moment. Equal parts of her wanted to reach out and hold her hand as well as grasp her shoulders and shake her hard. The words she had spoken came like a jolt of electricity coursing through her veins, a sting and stimulus.
And looking into those blue eyes, she saw a reflection of the world backward, where things were skewed and shuffled and wrong. In a world of warped reflections, on the other side of the mirror, was where they could be together, perfectly in synch. But here, it would be wrong. "You don't mean that."
She couldn't do it. And it took every ounce of her being to convince herself of that. The line in the sand had been erased, and she knew which one of them would cross it first.
She stalked toward Anu and reached to touch her face. Fingers curled around the fey's face, shaping her cheek. Looking into the ocean-blue eyes, Geneva knew she would only have one chance to make this work. Suddenly, the gentle pressure of her fingers changed. She twisted her wrist, cupping Anu's chin and jerking her head forward so that they were face-to-face. She looked straight into her eyes, their vision in complete alignment. Her green eyes were cold as she bared her teeth. "Stay away," she snarled, the sound fierce, low, threatening.
She dropped her hand from Anu's face, fingers clenching into fists as her shoulders hunched in. "Stay the hell away."
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Standing became easier, though the weight of her emotions grew more and more unbearable. Feeling them was painful, but not feeling them was impossible. She might as well stop breathing. They would come, whether she prayed that it all to end, or whether she held her breath. They washed over her soul again and again. It was never ending. Whether she left or not, it wouldn’t stop.
Waiting the seconds she had before Geneva spoke Anu wondered where she would go. Leaving entirely, being a lone wolf was something she hadn’t thought of for some time. Running away wasn’t new to her, but this time she had faith there was just darkness waiting for her. No hope of a new life, changes or something more. The cold concrete of the city was calling her, opening its harsh and gagged arms out to her. Never had it seemed so comforting.
Suddenly, Geneva was upon her, taking the distance between them and eating it with a single stride. Anu stood, still as a hand, so gentle and fingers so soft tracing the line of her face. Her heart fluttered at the feeling, and for a single moment, no longer then a heart beat Anu thought that their mouths would touch. She braced for it, waited and unknowingly wanted it to happen.
Something, wrong and unnatural rang in her head, as she looked into the pools of jade. They were suddenly sharp jewels, hard and solid as they watched her. The voice was came from the soft mouth wasn’t Geneva’s, Anu was sure of it. Possessed by another, she spoke with fangs shining. Anu tried to take a step backward, but only hit the couch and caused her to fall against the cushions.
Frozen, Anu watched with a gaping mouth. Her heart filled her ears and made her thoughts inaudible. A weight fell against her chest, as if she had been physically pushed and her breath was caught in her lungs. Blue eyes looked at the beast that stood before her, nothing about it reminded her of Geneva. And still, there was nothing stopping her from moving forward.
She slowly regained her footing, but as she stood they were planted solidly. Even though when she watched her different and with anger that blacked her soul, Anu wanted nothing more them to hold her. For it to be her arms wrapped around her, with tears streaming down both their faces. The image remained, but behind the blazon tears that hung on her eyelids. Voice filled with the fear, the fear of never having her the fear that as soon as she walked away her heart would burst with the sorrow that began flooding her from her toes upwards. Fear that the love Geneva said she felt was some how gone one. Her anger hid it well, and Anu realized that with out it, she wanted nothing more then to turn to dust and be carried away with the wind.
I said anything.
Still she stood planted, rooted in the floorboards that held them above ground. Her breathing was growing faster, and her voice harder then she ever expected. You made me believe you, Had all the words been a lie? She moved, a step towards the door making her weak but I never lied to you. I love you. a changed voice, hushed whispers. How and why were things even Anu couldn’t understand. Watching, not knowing if her words would hurt more then all the others had already, Anu saw all the things she had done to her. It would be better, just to fade away.
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The world was spinning, and Geneva felt as though her head was spinning with it. Everything came too fast, a blur of color, a splash of emotion. The harsh red of pain as it jolted through her head like jagged lightning. A slash of gray as she peered the clouds through the window. The stricken blue of Anu's eyes that struck her with more force than a mac truck. It was all too much for her to focus on at once.
She didn't say anything to refute Anu's words. She knew that she had never lied. And Geneva had never lied to Anu. She could never dream of lying to her. When she had professed her love, she had meant it more ardently than any other words she had uttered ever before. She bit her tongue to keep from calling out her name, to keep from letting her feelings take her over.
Her voice was still ragged as her lips slipped back down to cover her teeth. She spoke, and the snarl was absent from her voice. But her voice was heavy, raw as though she had screamed for days. "You have everything," she said. "You have a mate, you have children." You have me and you always will.
She looked at her, moving past her to reach the door first. She had lost all those things - Jordan and her own children. She knew the pain of that loss, and she would not let Anu know the bitter taste. Nor would she be party to that lost. She would keep that pain from Anu, even if it doubled her own loss. "I--Anu," she started, the vulnerability evident in her voice. "You don't need to stay away..."
She slipped the satchel over her shoulder, and looked for a long moment. "I'm leaving." And she slipped out of Haven Mansion, intent on the borders.
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There is nothing else that you can do
No, you can't understand what I'm going through
And if the world has changed, well, I'll be damned
Oh, 'cause I'm no good at being brave
Not even on the better days
And there are things we cannot save
No matter how hard we try
There is nothing else that you can do
No, you can't understand what I'm going through
And if the world has changed, well, you'll do fine...
Solid, strong and rooted. Like a tall oak, larger then she could ever be or ever imagined. Blue eyes watched, knowing Geneva would see how she felt. Knowing that their body would touch, and their minds would clear. The hearts would beat as one, and any doubt that passed through her mind would be gone. They would laugh at the idea that there could be lies between them. And her pounding, pained and aching heart would be cradled softly in her chest.
What a fool.
The world fell, the boards that surrounded her. Each plank, each brick, each nail that made the building around her fell. Slowly that walls crashed, turning into dust. The roof lifted, showing the darkness of night, though no stars shone through the curtain. Just one solid space above. Anu looked down, to see no floor but a mirror of the sky. Geneva’s words came as muffled cries. And Anu looked to see the back of the fey, and she knew.
Ripping, tearing.
Her breath stopped, caught and unable to be recovered. Again and again she tried, taking in the air that no longer surrounded her. It was thick, unable to flow into her lungs. Gone, the doorway fell leaving nothing but the black that flooded it from the shadowing sky. Her chest rose and fell, searching for the air. A paw felt it, pushing to help its fight. Still nothing happened.
On the absent floor.
She had everything, children that weren’t hers, a mate who would never trust her again. A family that would soon dissipate like her surroundings. Anu had everything. Had. A dream, something that she wouldn’t have again. The seconds ticked away, a large clock in her mind resonated each second in her ears. Another gasp, just another try. She had everything, pieces of her life that she held with clinging fingers. Knees touch the ground that no longer held her and eyes blinked, tears falling freely.
Hand against her chest.
Silence, it was shattering. Everything had disappeared, and all she could focus on was the vibration that she lacked. The pounding had been the rhythm of her being. Pressing harder, she couldn’t even feel it. There was no thunder, no lightning crashes. No beating hoofs and no gunfire. Nothing, empty and hollow. Her breath had returned, and hardly filled the space. It was wrong, pure and simple. The ache was numb, the pain had only filtered into every other cell of her form. Yet the ever presence of the pounding muscle had ceased.
What she had was gone.
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