they say it's better to bury your sadness.
#1
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mall-caps;">Out of Character

    Name: Kaena Lykoi
    Birthdate: October 24, 2001
    Species: Luperci hybrid of 50% coyote, 25% dog, 25% wolf.
    Gender: Female
    Contact: the sleepy glow (AIM)



mall-caps;">In Character
    Even at a distance, the canine hybrid appeared determined. Her gait was quick, and she pressed forward hurriedly. Her fur was haggard and unkempt, though she now had two frayed and obviously ill-tended braids woven into the left side of her mane. She was far leaner than she was before, drained by her time on the road, but fire and determination shone in her remaining eye. Kaena had come back home after nearly two years only to find it a charred wasteland with no indication of the life it had once held. She'd almost given up then, stopping to rest for a few days on the coast she'd once called home, subsisting on fish trapped in tidal pools once the ocean receeded. She'd almost given up then, but the faintest scent had caught on her nose, and she picked up the trail immediately, heading over the ruined side of the mountain. She was somewhat surprised to find green on the far side, lands untouched by the fire that had wrought the life from the former lands.


    Her footsteps were surer now than they had been before she'd rested; the injury which had plagued her over last year and a half always seemed to settle with a few days of rest, and then flare up again once she got going. The hybrid knew what she needed for the devil wound to heal up. There was only one thing that would make it go away—that was coming home again. Or so said Astaroth with his dying breath, bleeding from a jagged hole in his throat. Kaena believed he'd cursed her, and anymore it wasn't easy to tell whether it was actually a curse or something the hybrid's mind had simply decided was true. She was almost ten years old, and the year on the road in quiet silence with herself had done more damage to her mind than anything else. It was nonsensical that "home" hadn't healed her—or was it? The sands of Inferni weren't anymore; now they were just sands. Inferni was home, and home would heal her and make her strong again, though naturally that wasn't the primary drive to return. That was family. In pursuit of Eris, she'd left a hell of a lot behind, and she darkly wondered what remained.


    The border scent was growing steadily stronger as she descended the mountain, cutting through green territory that reeked of wolves. She was not afraid. Injured and exhausted as she was, she was pretty confident she could snarl and show her way out of a real confrontation, so long as she kept her hurt leg planted on the ground. It didn't matter in the end, though she trekked over heavily used trails, she encountered no one. She kept alert, constantly turning her head to allow her one good eye to scan the area for threats. Her ears were perked, the scarred one a few inches shorter and mangled. Altogether, not much had physically changed about Kaena; she had a few more minor scars to brag about and she carried a tattered pack over her shoulder.


    As the hybrid delicately stepped around a fallen log, her gaze fell upon an unmistakable sight, and she hurried herself despite the ache in her leg. It was throbbing sharply now, a stabbing pain that increased with each step closer to what was certainly Inferni's new home. The closer she came to the cure, the harder the demon's jaws clamped onto her leg, sinking his teeth in a bid to remain where he was. She could see gleaming white skulls splashed with red, tied to sticks and dangling from trees—just the same as before. She wondered if they'd imported the old decor, and inhaled the scents of Inferni. There were only two she recognized, and just one scent she could pick out of a thousand others.


    There was a rare emotion thumping through her heart: glee. She could smell Gabriel and his authority clearly on the wind, just as she had figured. She halted just before she came to the marked border. It killed her to stop. All of her excitement evaporated immediately and she felt a stab of guilt and self- resentment as she paced back and forth, unable to keep still despite the searing pain in her leg. After a few moments the fire in it stopped her, and she sat abruptly, her hand flying to her ankle, clutching at it. It burned beneath her fingers, and it felt like eternity before it started to fade. She was so close, but she was a stranger now and she would be treated as one if she happened to encounter anyone who didn't recognize her, and rightly so.
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#2
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    A cool breeze was blowing, making its way from the bay and heading east. It smelt of salt-water and the musky rank of fish, a combination that was both welcoming and repulsive all at once. Still, it was a familiar smell, and one that Gabriel found common. He considered this atop the thousand of other things on his mind; the change in his son, his daughter’s absence, his brother’s children, Jezebel, and the going-ons between Inferni and Phoenix Valley. Of those things, the latter continued to plague him. Things had to end. They could not realize he had killed their mad elder woman, for if they were to do such, he knew there was no possibility to end the bloodshed.
     Gabriel believed in blood, but he did not desire another war. Not so long as his niece’s daughter and Zana remained as possible weak points. It was a terrible thought, but it was militaristic. He could not make up for those two; as strong as Gabriel was, a unit balanced on their weakest point. To go to war meant to lose Ryan, for he would not leave her in such an skirmish—especially not when she still believed she loved the steel colored coyote who had chosen to be a wolf.
    The thought made him grunt, a noise that was close to a growl, and rise to his feet. Something felt off. It had been a subtle change, but one that struck lightning through his blood. Something was peculiar, something he was sensitive to and something that should not have been. The Aquila relied on instinct, and let his bones carry him to the source. When the smell hit him he froze; one foot in the air, ears high, eyes wide. What he smelled seemed impossible. Gabriel moved quickly, then, a new purpose in his step, and found her near the borders. Two years had wrecked her body. She was older then the sun and turning ragged. This was not what he recognized. He recognized her eye because it was the exact same shade of fire as his, and because despite everything else he had lost from his parents, he could not escape her vision. That was not a choice, as his father’s necklace was. Gabriel was as much Lykoi as he was de le Poer.
     “I thought you were dead,” he said, unable to hide the anger in his voice. A small amount of awe was there too; it seemed unreal that she should have survived so long.



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#3
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mall-caps;">In Character
    As she waited, her thoughts turned inward. Kae's mind was messy and blank in spots, swirling black and red anger in others. There was anxiousness in her, a steady, building uneasiness that rose in her and made her heart beat fast. She was worried about how she might be perceived—certainly she didn't want to be thought of as a returning queen; she didn't want to seem as though she had returned to reclaim any thrones. She neither deserved that honor nor did she desire it. She was never made for leadership and now she was simply too old.


    The sun shone rather merrily, though Kaena could find no happiness to compliment it. There would be time for jubilation later, when she found out whether or not she was welcome home. It wasn't as if she and Gabriel hadn't had problems in the past—there was awkwardness, pain, and spats of violence in their history. Her homecoming wasn't likely to run completely smoothly; though there were few familiar scents on the wind she was sure there would be some who remembered her, some who still had it out for her blood elsewhere. She wondered how many of the wolves and their children whispered her name, if any did at all—certainly she occupied someone's darkest thoughts of revenge, somewhere.


    The gray hybrid didn't have long to wait—she could smell Gabriel over the wind. At once, she exhaled sharply—both in relief and building nervousness. As her anxiousness over meeting a stranger subsided, the same feeling built over encountering Gabriel again. She braced herself as Gabriel emerged from deeper within the territory. He was the same, yet different—the weight of leadership was clearly on his shoulders, though he seemed to carry it well. He spoke sharply, and Kaena looked away and lowered her head. Those automatic movements were written into her bones and blood. She kept herself smaller than him, as she knew she had to, and drew her knees to her chest. After a moment, her golden eye returned to him, and focused squarely on his forepaws.


    "I should be," she started. Her face grew distant for a brief moment as her mind flashed to the searing pain, falling into that swirling black hole and waking up half-dead. By all rights, she and Astaroth ought to have killed each other in that small, patchy brown meadow. They should have sprayed each others' arterial blood across the trees and died over each other, and rotted to dust with each other. "Fate has a sense of humor, I guess," she finally said, finding no other reasonable explanation for her continued existence. She should have died several times over in the last year, let alone her whole life—it seemed she'd spent most of it just squeezing past the claws of the reaper.


    The coyote hybrid quelled her anxiousness and found herself almost zenlike, absolutely calm and numb, though she was dimly aware of emotion happening within her, somewhere outside her current range of feeling. Gabriel's anger was clear, and she wondered vaguely if she ought to run, and decided against it. If death was coming for her today, it would come here and face her now on this border. She would not run, and death would not snap at her heels and pull her down slowly. "I'm sorry," she said, and it was genuine. She wanted to fall toward him and throw her arms around him and run her fingers through his fur—her was her flesh and blood, her son. She had spent the better part of two years in pursuit of another child, and there was an odd sense of loss creeping into Kaena's mind. What had she missed here?

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#4
Zana had been trailing behind the large dog like leader of the clan, trying to practice her stalking and tracking though she knew that it was kindof pointless since she couldn't even really see their Aquila over the high grasses and brush. She had thought she'd lost him for the most part except for the scent that was still on the wind. Almost to the point of just turning back the girl stopped suddenly when from a few yards away she heard the sound of Gabriel's voice and boy did he sound angry. She swallowed her fear and scurried over to where the leader's voice had ranged from, realizing as she tumbled out of the brush that he wasn't alone.

Zana's little hand went instantly to her tiny but deadly blowdarts as she narrowed her eyes as the stranger who towered overhead. She glanced over to Gabriel as she asked, "What's she want.." Not even caring if the lady was a newcoming clan mate or someone she should fear. The fact that Gabriel was angry with her was enough for the young adult to dislike her right now. Her tiny ribbon wrapped rat-tail lashed back and forth as she waited to find out just what was intruding upon the clan's home.
#5
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So I wrote a reply to this and then my computer died. This one isn't as good, unfortunately. :[

     Twin impulses raced through his blood. One sought to embrace her as a mother, and to be glad that she had returned to him. The second demanded rage and wrath. Both of these remained buzzing, white-noise in his skull. She did something he had never imagined seeing; bow, to him, to anyone. His mother was the epitome of pride, and had always been as such. In this way, she was perhaps responsible for his own fault in the matter. He heard her speak but the words seemed remarkably distant. “Get up,” he said, the anger dying in his throat. He could not stand to see her so…pathetic.
     The Aquila’s mouth opened to speak when the auburn-coated child emerged from the tall grass. Having not seen the girl in what felt like months, he was startled by her size (or lack thereof). Without thinking, his lips pulled up, bearing his teeth in a display of dominance. It was impulsive, a trained reaction—defending his mother, as he had when he served under her. Gabriel barely realized he was doing such a thing. “Easy,” he warned the girl, seeing all too well she was carrying some sort of peculiar weapon.
     His head turned back to Kaena, took in the mass of scars that formed a language he did not completely understand, and his eyes softened just slightly. “I would assume she’s here to come home. Meet your grandmother, Zana.” Grandmother fifth over, it seemed. The Lykoi woman was responsible for nearly all of the coyotes that called Inferni home. Gabriel had no doubt she would be proud of such a thing.



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#6
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mall-caps;">In Character
    Gabriel's words and tone surprised her, and for a long moment she hardly twitched. She fought hard against instinct, and finally lifted her head, though she did not stand yet. The odd, empty feeling remained in her heart, and it felt heavy looking at Gabriel. He had changed—his fur did not have all of that brightness it had held, and it seemed it had grown shades darker with the years. His eyes seemed worlds older.


    Before he could speak again, there was another. She was young and she moved in a puppyish manner, her fur a bright orange-gold shade. As Kaena studied her, there was something oddly familiar about the youth, though she was certainly a stranger, born while Kaena was on the run. The hybrid noticed that the youth was armed, though Kae was unfamiliar with the weapon and how it might harm her. She was curious, but she didn't speak, nor answer the youth—the question was obviously for Gabriel. Kaena's eyes never left the youth once she appeared, and her brain wildly tried to place her. She was too familiar, but Kaena did not know her and it was irritating that the gray coyote could not place her.


    He had his teeth bared and he seemed the model of dominance and power. It took all of her resistance to avoid dipping her head low again, though the display was certainly directed toward the young one. Gabriel spoke to the young one, and though he had turned his head back to Kae, his words were still directed for the youth. She listened, and the words jolted her. Grandmother? Her eye, which had not left Zana since her arrival, widened—she certainly had missed a lot in her absence. She wanted to run a circle around the younger coyote and look her over; she wanted to pester Gabriel with fifty-odd questions about how many grandchildren she had. She could see parts of her self in the youth, and she questioned her first assumption that this was Gabriel's child. She seemed far too much of a coyote, petite with larger ears and a slender muzzle, and Gabriel did not seem to regard her in too much of a warm manner. Curious.


    "I do want to come home," she said, punctuating her statement with a nod. She couldn't help but let her excitement creep into her voice. "I've been gone too long, missed too much," she added, her voice growing sour. She turned her head to Zana, regarding the girl with her reptilian eye once again, though it held a warmth and fire it hadn't for a long time. "Zana... good to meet you," she said somewhat awkwardly, feeling the phrase was nowhere near adequate. There was an ache in her heart—she should have been here for any and all of her grandchildren during their birth and their youth, and her shoulders drooped slightly. At once, she was elated to be here and disappointed to find she had missed out.


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#7
Zana knew she had misjudged her abrupt appearance as the dominant stance of the Aquila towered over her. Her thistle hued orbs shifted back and forth between the two as Gabriel gave her the command to stand down. She slowly let her hand drop, still holding the weapon in her clawed fingers as she eyed the lady with interest at the fact that Gabriel didn't want her dead, yet. She frowned and glanced back to the doogish male as she wanted confirmation that this woman was not the enemy, even though everything about the way he was acting was telling her different.

The young Lykoi finally gave a sigh and settled in to find out what was going on, eyeballing the woman as she seemed to be doing the exact same. The lack of an eye reminded her of Jefferson but she didn't bring that up, seeing how the pack she once resided in seemed to bring anger and agitation to their leader, but she couldn't help but find things in the woman of others she knew. She looked from Gabriel to the woman as that golden flame of an eye watched her, realizing that they were the same as her uncle's. Unsure if she should ask or not she let one ear flick back, showing her unease at everything that was going down.

When he announced the woman finally she couldn't help but let her jaw drop, her eyes slowly trailing back to the elder woman, a skeptic look crossing her face as she crouched down low, shuffling her paws back and forth as she tried to come to terms with this newest relative. She wasn't for certain what she thought now, knowing that this lady was her grandmother. Both ears swiveled back as she finally shut her maw and swallowed. "My grandmother?" She asked, the doubt clearly obvious as she narrowed her eyes slightly. Putting the small weapon away she frowned and grumbled softly.

Finally she gave in, "Where have you been?", the question asked with a bitter voice, annoyed at the fact that here was a family member that should have been around her whole life and yet at the brink of her adulthood she was just finding the woman was alive. There were very few female figures in her live that had been good to her, just because they were related didn't mean she was going to have the little girl's trust right off the bat.
#8
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     Gabriel certainly did not miss her reaction, and a small smile hooked the corners of his mouth. If there was one thing that Kaena Lykoi valued above all else, it was her family. How would she react, knowing he had killed his own brother? The thought made his eyes darken a shade, and glint with all the wrath and fury of a just and angry God. Things had to happen the way they did; the balance of the holy and the unjust had to be maintained.
     He offered her nothing in response. It was Zana, loud-mouthed despite her small stature (indeed, she was only a foot and a half taller then him currently), who asked the question he had intended to. The Aquila spared a glance to the girl, settled onto his haunches, and looked back to his mother. Doggish eyebrows lifted, but he did not open his mouth. Gabriel had nothing to say.



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#9
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mall-caps;">In Character
    The hybrid appeared livelier than she had since her arrival just then, her gaze still intently focused on Zana. There was a something akin to joy in her face, none of the bitterness or anxiousness the youth's eyes held. Zana seemed hesitant to put away her weapon, and Kaena was intrigued, thinking perhaps she had suffered some trauma in her youth. The thought rammed a knife of guilt into Kaena's throat, and whatever joy had been in her face vanished in a flash. Maybe it was something she could have prevented if she had been here. Zana gaped open-mouthed at Kaena, and questioned her legitimacy, shades of doubt creeping across her cinnamon-colored face. She holstered her strange weapon, and after a long moment asked another question, one Kaena had been almost dreading since she arrived. It was a tale of repeated failure and nearly fatal failure: just an inch deeper and Astaroth would have spilled her organs out into the sunny afternoon, and she would have been haunting Inferni instead of returning to it.


    The coyote had not expected to avoid that question as long as she did, and she was surprised she had dodged it thus far. It ought to have been the first thing demanded of her, but Kaena was glad it wasn't. Gabriel remained silent, which was somehow more comforting than anything he could have said at that moment—no matter the words he chose, Kaena thought it might come out derisively. It damn well should have, but it was the last thing she wanted to hear at that moment. She had left him and Inferni to chase a purebred monster conceived of rape and violence, a monster who had left Kaena to die in a dingy yellow field thousands of miles from home. Kae owed her other children more than that, especially Gabriel—she had already lost him once, and she was lucky he had come back at all.


    Kaena considered for a moment, drawing in a breath slowly and exhaling it quietly. Her single raptor's eye shut almost completely, just the thinnest slit of brilliant gold shining from beneath its charcoal outline. Her heart grew heavy with memory, and when she reopened her eye all the way again, Kaena's head was in a far-away place. Though she knew Zana was unlikely to know either Astaroth or Eris, she offered only the shortest version of the story—details could always be provided upon request. "I chased Astaroth after he took my daughter from me." Her voice was rather low and gravelly, and she paused again after speaking, spiraling through the past in her head. The smoke-colored hybrid still did not know why Astaroth had kidnapped her child or where they were headed; when she caught up with them, she had asked for no explanation, she only demanded blood. Perhaps she should have spoke first—then she might have been able to secure even a general idea of where they were headed, and she could have continued tracking Eris.


      But in her vast anger, she wanted Astaroth's life and her daughter returned, nothing more—and she'd gotten the lesser half what she wanted. Her face twisted then, fiery red anger flashing across her features for a brief moment before that same distance settled into her eyes again and her expression left her entirely. "When I caught up with them, Astaroth and I fought, and both of us almost died. One of us did." Her presence made it obvious which that was, and almost mechanically, the silver canine's fingers traced the newest scar added to her ever-growing collection, the thick, jagged one slashed horizontally across her belly. She'd nearly been eviscerated by the blow, and she was dumb lucky that the wound was relatively shallow and missed her organs. The ashen canine took in another breath, and her exhalation was ragged this time, a shudder that dropped her shoulders and sent her ears flat against her head. Her eye darted away from either of her family members, instead drawn to the ground, the dirt, the grass, the trees—anything but the piercing gazes which regarded her.


    "When I came to, Eris had already left me on her own." Cold bitterness had crept into her tone, and her muzzle writhed into something like a snarl, though it was utterly lifeless, devoid of any of the fire and spark Kaena's usual menacing expression might hold, flat and lifeless as the charred wastelands they had once called home. She hadn't needed nor expected to be saved by Eris, but her daughter could have at least stuck around—after all, Kaena had only trailed her across the country. "I took some time to mend and look for her, but she was long gone." Eris's voluntary departure had set two opposing emotions into Kaena, and both were lingering ones she had pondered since the event. She was at once immensely relieved at Eris's absence, yet an alarm in her head screamed she had made a terrible mistake in letting her daughter slip away.


    The outpost and Rangi were miles and months behind her, but they were the freshest details on her mind—she vividly recalled finding the bar and drinking herself halfway to death, trying in vain to drown the memories of Eris from her head. The youth haunted her still. "I couldn't find my way home at first, but after a while, I found someone who could point me in the right direction," she finished, her single eye finally turning back to the canines before her, focusing on Zana for a moment before turning to Gabriel. It had grown almost misty, clouded with memories of the past, but beneath that thin film shone a new light, one that had been absent for too long. There was still a new purpose yet to her life, standing on two paws not five feet away from her.

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#10
(sorry my head is killing me, this is gonna be pathetic)

She watched the shades of emotion as they crossed the elder woman's face. She didn't know what she wanted from the woman but she didn't believe that the lady would be able to provide her with it. She flicked her ears back, unsure as the woman began to finally explain the whereabouts of what she'd been up to in the span of the youth's life. She lowered her eyes as watched the small puffs of dirt flit across the ground as she realized that she knew nothing of her grandmother's life. She would have thought it was unfair but the woman had chosen to chase after one child and abandon the rest, Zana didn't like that thought one bit and she couldn't help the fact that she wasn't certain if she wanted to hear anymore that the lady had to say.

The words went on and on as she gave a short detailed explanation of everything. Zana was quiet and tried to avoid the elder lady's eyes as her story came to a close. She slowly turned her thistle orbs to glance at Gabriel as she asked, "Do you want to keep her?" The tiny lady wasn't certain if she did but she would never know unless the lady was part of the clan and gave her reason to trust or hate her. She knew her train of thought was childish and there was no point in even asking Gabriel what he was going to do but she had still.

One little finger traced patterns in the sands as she waited the decision of their leader, stealing glances back towards the ashen woman as they waited the verdict.
#11
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     The name of the man who had claimed to be the devil cause Gabriel’s face to darken hellishly. From the moment his mother had come with his scent on her pelt, the Aquila had been furious. He would not accept that the man was the devil, nor that those children had been spawned by such. It was shameful. It made no sense and it made him ill to think that his mother had been so foolish. Still, he did not fully understand her. All he knew was that the woman was mad, in her own way, and had always been mad.
     She had killed him and lost Eris. For that, Gabriel was glad. The girl had been unusual—she had not been like her siblings. They had known it. All of the children had known it. If she had died out in the wilderness, Gabriel would not regret such a thing. He barely heard Zana’s words, so focused he was on his mother. Even now, her will to live astounded him. “If you wish to stay we have a place for you.” His eyes spoke volumes more: I have a lot to tell you, they said. More then you could imagine.



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#12
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mall-caps;">Out of Character
    I think Kaena & Gabriel require a thread after this is over? Big Grin


mall-caps;">In Character
    Part of the coyote hybrid's head was still elsewhere, just as it always was—some might say her whole life was just one miserable chain of tragedy and trauma. Kaena herself was no optimist, to be sure; she had never seen the bright side of anything in her life. Yet standing on the outskirts of Inferni's new territory, inhaling the scents dancing on the wind that spoke of strength and cohesion, looking on her son, the Aquila—all she felt in her chest and her head was a swelling pride that did not seem to end. This was still Inferni, the same one Zarah had crafted what seemed like years ago on that beach with Kaena at her side. They met by chance, and recreated and redefined the coyote clan there, basing it on things that had happened what seemed like eons ago in another burned valley. Paradise always burned, it seemed—there was no other way for it to die but in flames. Her daydreams ceased, and she shook her head to clear it of them.


    The young Lykoi questioned Gabriel, and Kaena's gaze followed the lavender eyes of the youth to her son. There was something on his face she could not place at first, but she realized after a moment what it was—he had been here the whole time she had not, for certain; he could fill in the blanks in her brain and more. In an instant she wanted to corner Gabriel and devour all of the memories his mind held, but she couldn't be so demanding of him. She wanted to close the distance first—she was not so heartless she did not detect the schism between them. The elder hybrid had allowed it to happen, and she was responsible for it. She ought to be the one to mend it. Again she wanted to go to her charcoal-dusted son—but this time she wanted to crawl on her belly and beg his forgiveness for leaving him and his siblings and their children for one wretched child. He would not allow that, though, and Kaena had not grovelled in so long she did not think she remembered how. The coyote would have to figure another way.


    Gabriel's eyes were intent on her. She felt them pierce through her soul; his gaze was the mirror image of her own before she'd lost her eye. He spoke, and Kaena felt a wave of relief wash over her. As she had gotten closer and closer to the old territory she dreamed of being chased off, fantasized that not even her family would want her anymore. She didn't know what would happen then—maybe she would have just let them kill her and ended it. If they didn't want her anymore, no would would, and she was destined to a short life of isolation anyway, so why not? The thoughts had left her consciousness shortly thereafter, though, resurfacing only at that moment to be swept away by her son's invitation. "This is where I belong," she affirmed, finally getting to her feet. The pain in her leg was gone, the false devil defeated. He released his hold and crawled away to some other poor soul.

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#13
Zana's shoulders slumped slightly as it seemed that the elder family member was going to be accepted so easily. She frowned slightly as she let her thistle orbs glance towards the woman for a moment before quickly turning away. She wanted nothing to do with the beast right now but sooner or later curiosity would get the best of her, it always did. Zana shook her head sightly for a moment before dashing off into the brush she'd first emerged from. The girl was in no mood to learn more about her grandmother and in her own mind she believed that she had better things to do. There were poisons to milk from plants and berries and darts to whittle.

She glanced through the brush one last time to make certain neither of the adults were following her before she set off to find the plants that she needed. She would soon have to find Colibri again to find more plants with a wider range of poisonous effects. There was much for the little girl to do that she should be and she was far behind.
#14
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