you had a busy day today

POSTED: Mon Mar 15, 2010 8:03 am

[lay me down in sheets of linen]

Life's calmed down and I can't resist joining again. This time nothing should get in my way <3 <3 1. Character Name: Fatin Kali
2. Character Birthdate (including year): 05-07-03?
3. Whether s/he is a regular wolf or a Luperci: birth
4. Species: Red Wolf / Coyote mix
5. Gender: Female
6. A secondary form of contact (AIM, MSN, Y!M). Distant Vampire

[you had a busy day today]

Atulya and Avani had come for her swiftly in the night. Kaena had been out attending to whatever leadership duties she had and Fatin had gone without much of a fight. She just hadn't had it in her to fight with them. Over the months in their captivity Fatin had been required to spill much of the history and secrets to Awenasa's success as a family unit. Eventually they had gotten all they needed from her and her time was done with them. They had drugged her and tossed her aside in some barren field as they migrated on, away from Awenasa and away from the lands she cared about. And so began her trek home again.

Her wrists were bare now from months of being bound and her arm hadn't healed perfectly. Somehow though, she had not given her physical imperfections much thought in light of the fact that she was still alive. She hadn't expected to survive winter off scarps and discarded pilfering but somehow she was still here and she was steadily trying to get to Inferni. She did not know if Gabriel and Kaena would even still be there (though her heart assured her they would not have left) and she did not know how they would react to her arrival, but she just wanted so desperately to see them again that it burned inside her.

Home, now, as Jaded Shadows had once been, was firmly planted inside the borders of the coyote's clan and she had no intentions of settling elsewhere. If they would take her in or not, she would never run under another pack's banner so long as she lived.
Lifting her head she called out smoothly, the wind picking up her hair and blowing it gently. She hadn't shifted back from optime in a long time, and could not honestly remember what the world looked like from her short(er) feral state. It would be a wonder how things went now, as she honestly could not anticipate any sort of reaction with ease. Nerves got to her, and she began to pace slightly, her head down and her ears slicked back - it wasn't like her to be truly nervous."..." .


POSTED: Mon Mar 15, 2010 8:38 am


It seemed as if all of Inferni was on high alert. Naturally, the silver-furred hybrid was included in this; as the second-in-command she was expected to keep her eyes and ears open, even if it was Anselm's job to focus on the borders and other packs. It would not be good for Kaena personally or the Inferni clan as a whole if she were to slack on her duties even in the least, and so she spent much of her time looping the border, endlessly pacing up and down the perimeter. For her to appear useless in these rough times would certainly bode ill for the coyote clan. Occasionally she would run into other members of the clan, doing the same thing as she was—with so many members, it was difficult not to run into another coyote these days. Even so, it was never enough. Fifty or a hundred thousand coyotes were not enough to scare Haku off; they would need to dethrone the Dahlian king in order to be safe once again.

As the hybrid woman made her way forward, a strange scent entered her nose, one she immediately recognized. It was no mystery to the Centurion, but there was still a long moment of hesitation in her, one that drove a knife of guilt, fear, and anxiety into her heart. She had desired and dreaded this moment equally, fantasies of demanding to know where the fuck she went and what the fuck happened, nightmares of breaking to little bits in front of her. The hybrid did not know which would happen. For a terrible moment she almost thought she might ignore the red wolf and leave someone else to greet her. Then, she moved from her stock-still position and headed quickly toward the source of the scent, happening across its owner no more than ten minutes later.

They were both scarred now, surely—there were a few more adorning the monochrome canine's body since then, but the largest and the most serious of these wounds was somewhere no one, not Fatin nor anyone else in the world, could see. The Lupus form was a surprise, but Kaena kept that from her face, retaining the stoicism that was so difficult for her to play at. She felt as if emotion might crack through the facade and fulminate from her at any moment, tearing her stony exterior to pieces. The gravitas of the situation was not lost on Kaena; there were no better healers in the world than Fatin Kali, and Inferni would be a far better place with her here. Even then, the hybrid woman's emotion dared to rise, bile in her throat daring to form—how many nights had she sat, stinking and wallowing and beyond drunk, beyond wrecked from Haku, wishing there were soft red-furred arms to wrap her up and a soft voice to whisper and tell her it was alright? She didn't speak, remaining well within Inferni's territory, staring forward at the ghost who had returned to its midst, waiting for her to speak first.

Table thanks to Vieira!

POSTED: Mon Mar 15, 2010 8:54 am

[lay me down in sheets of linen]

[you had a busy day today]

The burning realization that in mere moments she might see one of them again made her entire body tingle as her nerves were hypersensitive. She felt the dirt beneath her paws, the wind running through her fur, her blood surging in her veins - she felt everything. What she could not feel though was that familiar comfort here, instead, she felt as though she had betrayed them. Betrayed them by not being stronger, not being more capable, not being a better fighter or even being a better captive; she could have made more noise, raised a bigger fuss. But her fear had won out. Her fear had always driven her when push came to shove, she had an exquisite fight or flight instinct and normally it served her better. This time though, perhaps because it was so directly after the first encounter with them, it had been fear that drove her.

When Kaena approached Fatin did not need to turn to know that the Queen was on her way. She felt it in her heart, in her soul, in her very bones. What was in Kaena that had once driven her to stages beyond fear was now the very thing that called to her like a Siren's song. It was that drive and that spirit, the fire in the depths of Kaena's soul. And now, all Fatin truly wanted was to be burned by that fire once again. A whimper slipped out of her maw and she cursed herself; this wasn't the first impression she wanted to give Kaena again. "I'm sorry I vanished," she said gently her green eyes flashing as she finally turned to face the Lykoi. "They came back for me..and you were out. I-i don't know why, but I just d-din't fight it.." She was sorry, so very sorry!

She lowered her head, twisting her hands over her wrists nervously. The bare patches were smooth, well worn, and something she had picked up a bit of a nervous habit over. "I-i'm so s-sorry..."

POSTED: Mon Mar 15, 2010 9:19 am

The flame that had burned for so many years within Kaena had very nearly been extinguished, doused in the hybrid woman's spilled blood by Haku Soul. He had almost ripped it clean out of her; anyone who had the misfortune of happening on the Lykoi matron in the first month's worth of aftermath following her attack would have seen that plainly in her single remaining eye, which had appeared just as hollow and empty as the socket right next to it. Strange how after everything the coyote woman had been through, it was something so seemingly tiny and insignificant as Haku that would upset her balance so much. After all, she'd already been through it all; her very own half-brother had introduced her to all the darker desires of men when she was very young. What did Haku Soul have to offer that was new to Kaena Lykoi? She had years on him and his parents both.

The coyote wished she could feel pity for the russet wolf once again, she wished she could feel something for her again—maybe Haku had ripped the ability to love from her, too. There were too many things he had ruined for the monochrome-furred coyote. “Sorry,” she repeated flatly, though an actual sneer threatened to break out on her face for a moment, the corner of her coal lip twitching. “So you've come back, and Inferni is to guard you once more,” she added, quickly lest the concrete mask she'd forced onto her features disintegrate into that sneer. “Good—we need another war, another front to guard,” she said, this time the sarcasm clear in her tone. Kaena Lykoi was not generally difficult to read where it came to emotions.

The hybrid woman wondered what might have changed if she were the Aquila now. She had no right to turn Fatin away—though part of her didn't wish to at all, a larger part did, whether out of spite or misguided aggression it was not clear—and Gabriel would not haven forgiven her if she did. Not only had she guarded his very own children, taking them away from danger, but she was damn good at what she did. Rather suddenly and without warning, the hybrid's coal-colored ears were pinned against her head, a very different emotion from rage or disdain on her features now. “I needed you,” she said plaintively. And you weren't there, she added silently, yellow-golden eye searching the cinnamon-colored wolf's face for a response.

Table thanks to Ithen!

POSTED: Mon Mar 15, 2010 9:34 am

[lay me down in sheets of linen]

[you had a busy day today]

The moment that Kaena spoke Fatin wanted to flee. She wanted to turn away and run, but she couldn't. She had accepted this, she had told herself to steel herself against everything that they would give her. She deserved it, she had been gone. She had not fought, she had not honored them in any way. This was just. But it still hurt. It was like being slapped, being bitten, having everything pulled away and ravaged. "I'll leave then." She said as strongly as she could but her voice quivered and shook even with her attempted bravado. She had never stopped being afraid of Kaena, she knew exactly what the woman was capable of, but she still couldn't leave herself open fully to being hurt by the woman that she still loved.

It was thoughts of here, thoughts of being happy that had kept her going. It had been memories of times shared, of whispered words in the safety of the den they had shared - it was a promise of something good for them that had made her so determined to make it home. And now it was clear that the dream was over and she had ruined it for herself. She turned to leave but Kaena's voice once again spoke out and she stopped. It was shame, first, that ran it's course through her features causing her mouth to bundle into a frown, her eyes to look away in a fashion that made it clear that it hurt to focus on the coyote. Second came the sorrow and the horror at the realization something had befallen Kaena while she had been away. Kaena was strong, she was powerful, she was the protector and she was the warrior - Fatin was too tiny and meek to do her any good. So why had she been the one that was needed? How could it be that someone had needed her for anything? She bit into her lip stifling a whine; Kaena wanted none of her pathetic ways and had no use of the fire-kissed female falling to pieces on her proverbial doorstep.

"I wanted to be here." She said softly, her gaze falling to her feet in an awkward fashion that was made of guilt and laced with shame. "I was held captive, d-drugged and bound, and when they were d-done with me, they t-tossed me aside." She had wanted to come home here though, she had needed to so badly. She took a step towards Kaena, stopping herself after realizing what she was doing. She hadn't been invited, she wasn't wanted here. "I want to be here now." She said. "I know I can't make up for not being here, n-not being here for y-you....and I'm sorry."

POSTED: Mon Mar 15, 2010 10:17 am; background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;">

Hurt as she was, cut off as she was, there was still something in Kaena that wanted protecting, some childish part of her that still clung to comfort desperately. Were it not for that piece of her, she would have failed completely as a mother; none of her children would have loved her or even pretended to. Without that part of herself there was nothing but arrogance and barbarism within her. Wicked as she might have pretended to be, there was certainly some good, some softness within the scarred hybrid.

It was buried beneath a mass of old scar tissue and wounds years old, wounds that despite their age were still locked in the healing process, perhaps frozen in stasis where they were forever, intended only to cause the scarred matriarch pain. She had always believed that time was the best healer—yet how could she believe time would be a salve to her own wounds? No, there was only bloodshed for that—there was only tearing to pieces every single thing that ever meant anything to Haku Soul. She should have torn his son's throat out when he came to see her on the borders, but instead... instead she had seen fit to plant a seed of doubt in his mind, another amongst the Dahlians who might view the war in a different way. Perhaps that would blossom into something worthwhile, and she would not regret letting Conor Soul walk away from Inferni intact.

The coyote did and said nothing as the russet woman stepped forward into Inferni territory; she was not a trespasser. If Gabriel might admit that brat DaVinci to their lands... well, Fatin had hell of a lot more right to be here than he did in Kaena's mind. Guilt crept into her, finally. She should have expected that—what else would keep Fatin from Inferni, from her? Even so, the silver-furred woman could think of it only as abandonment; she could not help but hurt over the months alone. She would not have had to isolate herself if Fatin had been there. Torn, frowning, the silver-furred woman swiftly changed the subject, tilting her head to the side and narrowing her golden-yellow eye at the russet woman. She had to maintain strength, she had to retain control. “You're walking into a warzone,” she warned. “You're ready for that?” Maybe it was better for Fatin this way—if it appeared for one second she meant anything to Kaena, Fatin would become Haku's primary target, and he would hurt her first and foremost.

POSTED: Mon Mar 15, 2010 10:37 am

[lay me down in sheets of linen]

[you had a busy day today]

Once upon a time Fatin had been a woman who was proud of herself. It had been pride, and a touch of arrogance, that had made her believe she was beyond reproach in this life. That she was beyond being touched by anything the world had to offer. It had been these misguided thoughts that had caused her to be captured the first time, and the brutal way in which she had been broken that had caused her to fall so far from where she was into the creature standing before Kaena now. It was the broken child, the beaten child, that was all but shaking in front of Kaena, a pathetic sort of nervous woman who was every bit the waif that had been afraid of Kaena herself only years ago. Time with Salvaged had hardened her, a life of loss and love had made her stronger, and so quickly all of that strength ahd been plucked from her by the choices of random enemies. They had not even been her enemies, but those of her tribe's.

There was no fight from Kaena that Fatin stepped onto Inferni's territory and for that she felt a great sense of relief flood her. She would look over her shoulders and watch her back certainly, but for the time being she could breathe freely knowing that if death took her she would have been where she loved to be most. It was a consolation, even if it wasn't all that she wanted. It was a piece, it was a part of the prize. The rest could follow later, with any luck. Kaena did not react truly to what Fatin told her and the cinnamon kissed woman wondered what she had been expecting. Outrage? Anger? She had expected some reaction beyond a frown, but it was clear to her that something horrific had happened when she had been gone and that put her own plight far away from the forefront of her mind.

It was something to be said that even in times of tragedy, it all seemed so minuscule and irrelevant when it was the one you loved that had suffered.

War? Fatin's ears cupped towards Kaena, looking her over for the first time without true fear of her reaction; she had allowed her to enter the lands even if it was just a step, and though the Lykoi was anything but predictable Fatin took that as a sign of informality at least for the moment. "I'll provide whatever services I can..if it's collecting herbs for healing....or for poison." She had planned once to poison Skoll with a rabbit laced with deadly wasn't such a terrible idea anyways. She was broken, she looked like she had been hurt - if whoever came here and found her, more wolf than coyote, it might be easy to trick them. "Use me as you will." She said softly, almost expecting to be dismissed.

POSTED: Mon Mar 15, 2010 10:57 am; background-position: bottom center; background-repeat: no-repeat;">

Buhh, we'll consider this official acceptance, and Kae can walk Fatin to the greenhouse/D'Neville thar, debrief her on the war, we'll end there? And then another thread after that, moar awkwardness?! :D ((361))

A truly cruel type, a maniac like Haku, might have turned on her then and there—or worse, sent her to enemy lines. A reptilian part of Kaena's mind considered that possibility, considered that perhaps Haku did not know Fatin, that he did not know she was friend to the coyotes—the russet wolf did not smell of Inferni, and she could certainly pass for full-blooded canis lupus rufus. But Kaena stifled that thought with an inward shudder, for she was not Haku, and to even consider such a thing was tantamount to becoming him. She would not go there; she had come close enough with Vieira, and the taste of that sort of cruelty and viciousness was more than enough for her. The hybrid woman preferred to fight her battles face-to-face; she resorted to surreptitious sneaking only when it was warranted most, and her physical actions had no effect.

“Good,” she said, again flatly. When she spoke again, the first word was spat as if it was indeed tainted with poison. Haku deserves nothing more than a violent and painful death of poison. But you won't need to creep through the Dampwoods looking for mold,” the coyote said, turning away from the other coyote, taking a few slow steps forward to indicate for her to follow. Part of Kae couldn't stand to gaze on the russet-hued woman anymore; she was hurt and desirous and disgusted and angry and confused all at once, and looking at her just made it worse, it simply twisted her head up more. She hadn't begun to consider what awkwardness might yet come—Vieira didn't occupy all of the room in Kae's cave, but three would be a tight squeeze—assuming Kaena was even comfortable with Fatin residing there again, which was a question the Centurion could not answer, though she asked herself inwardly directly. “Anselm's built a greenhouse, we'll grow them there. If you can cultivate plants as well as harvest...” the coyote said, trailing off. Her steps were slower than usual; some weeks-old injures plagued her body. The sixth-day fights hadn't been totally successful, no, but they'd hurt Dahlia de Mai in the process.

POSTED: Mon Mar 15, 2010 10:57 am

<table class="infotable"><tr><td class="header">Welcome to 'Souls!</td></tr><tr><td><p>Hey, welcome to 'Souls. You've just joined the craziest bunch of wolf roleplayers on the vast internet. If you haven't done so already, you should check out the <a href="">rp guide</a> for detailed information about our werewolves and other general role playing information.</p><p>Now that you're accepted, you need to do two things:<br/><span class="indenttable">___</span>1. Make your first IC post within five days.<br/><span class="indenttable">___</span>2. Update your <a href="?act=UserCP&CODE=01">profile</a> with a bit of background information on your character.</p><p>You can also start saving up <a href="?viewtopic.php?t=16"> points toward titles and icons and cool stuff</a>. Check out the <a href="?showforum=19">Open Threads and Thread Requests</a> forum for people looking to roleplay. You can post random out of character chat in the <a href="?showforum=3">OOC Garbage</a> with us, too.</p></tr></td></table>

POSTED: Tue Mar 16, 2010 2:17 am

[lay me down in sheets of linen]
these tables of yours are outstanding! I've looked at that CSS table guide...but I'm too chicken to try it XD, and homgz, yes. we must! *abuses Fatin MOAR!*

[you had a busy day today]

The tracks along her eyes where they had tried to gouge them out had the silvery color of death all around them. The scar along her right forearm was equally obvious and she ran her fingers across it, playing with it in a way. She thought back to Jaded Shadows, to the pack that she had established the garden out front of - her neat little rows of plants and herbs all with their scribbled names on tiny placards in front of them. "I had a garden in Jaded Shadows," She said softly, following dutifully behind the coyote leader as they headed into the pack lands .These places were familiar too her, hauntingly so, it had been these lands she had walked in her moments of hazy consciousness with her emerald eyes half lidded under their copious amounts of drugs.

Fatin wanted to think that things would get better, that now she was here and home things would improve and a light could come back to her eyes - that Kaena's golden eye would glow once more and a joy would be shared between them. But there was a lead weight holding her hopes from truly taking flight. She was being punished, truly, for all that had happened and she could not tell now how she could over come them. She pushed these painful thoughts aside though in order to start thinking ahead. Marijuana was a common plant that would grow happily in a bright environment, and it would grow quickly enough to suit her purpose in perfect conditions. It was also toxic to canines. It would start with vomiting and incoordination, progress to sleepiness and hypersalivaton, then the pupils would dilate, blood pressure would drop, then their bodies would seize and they would slip into a coma. There would good chances not to come out of it.

She was a healer. A person who was meant to save, not harm. But for the sake of the ones she loved, she would do anything. It was amazing the kind of monster lurking inside when it was given it's chance to rear it's ugly head.

POSTED: Tue Mar 16, 2010 2:42 pm

CRAP, I KNOW. People make me such pretty things! XD I think all of the ones I've used thus far were made by Erin or Alta?! Not sure, but I used to lovelovelove this one so I dragged it back to life. >___>

Stunted and hurt as she was, the silver-furred coyote had closed herself off. The only things that mattered to her now were Inferni and her family; she would save both of them, she would end this war—it was her fault, she had started it anyway. If only she'd been smart enough to stay were she belonged, protected and safe behind Inferni's borderlands. If only, if only—the silver-furred hybrid had many regrets and many things she should have done better. Above all, she knew that she had been the one to drag them into this nonsense; she would be the one to pull them out. Even as the pair of hirsute creatures continued to walk toward the mansion, the monochrome-colored one continued to speak, intent on at least filling the russet canine in on what had occurred in her absence from the lands.

“He started this war,” she said quietly. She should have told Fatin everything, she knew this—but that was a weakness she was not willing to expose. She had told a pitiful few; only Gabriel, Razekiel, and Halo were told directly by the silver-furred coyote; anyone else who knew of her attack knew by proxy, the news spread by Gabriel. Halo had known first—and the cinnamon-furred girl had kept her word, keeping quiet the attack from the rest of the coyote clan. “He leads Dahlia, and many follow him blindly. Not all, but many,” she said, thinking of the Rosen's very son, the one who had showed up on her borders. Maybe Conor Soul would prove useful in time. “Some have died on both sides already, and we won't be safe till he's dead,” she added. She knew this for a fact; Haku wanted nothing more than to destroy the coyotes—whoever was next, she did not know, but she doubted he would stop at Inferni if he managed to destroy them.

Word Count: 317

POSTED: Sat Mar 20, 2010 3:31 pm

[lay me down in sheets of linen]

[you had a busy day today]

She remembered, like a filtered hazy dream, a council of leadership when the fires had first died and the way that Haku had called out against the coyotes with such venom. From the start he had demanded their extermination, leaving out his own litany of destruction for the sake of the sympathy vote. Kaena did not mention Cercelee, who had been his accomplice in leadership; this was not a good thing for Dahlia. "He tried to turn us all against Inferni...all the formed packs shortly after the fires had ended." She spoke gently, her nerves calmer when locked in such old memories. It had been like with Phoenix, over Skoll. Instantaneous opposing opinions had created a deep set hatred.

Fatin wondered briefly where her peaceful days had gone. Now, older and wiser(?, right?), she had seen more wars and battles than her little Jaded Shadows ever had entertained with Salvaged in it's midst. "It would please me as well." Came the silvery soft response, her voice tainted by anger she had long forgotten. It had been months since she had felt anything beyond simple fear, months since she had entertained happiness or anger, or sorrow or contempt. She had only been conscious enough to be afraid of what was coming next and it had not been a becoming feature for the once spit-fire cinnamon kissed girl.

POSTED: Sun Mar 21, 2010 8:46 am

I have no idea why this got so long. :| ((609))

For Kaena, there was no contrast between the past and the present in terms of bloodshed. She had known this for her whole life, practically from the moment she had entered the coldness of the world up until this very moment. It was always about fighting, winning, survival. The smoke-furred hybrid had been introduced to the world in violence and brilliant crimson, birthed into abuse and emptiness. Even so, she did not thirst for destruction of the earth and everything in it—no, the instead, Kaena sought vengeance for the wrongs that had been inflicted on her, and she vigorously defended what she believed was endangered. She was not like Haku. Kaena had her taste of his particular flavor of sadism, and she found it downright frightening. Apparently, even she had a line that she could not cross.

The ashen hybrid was not familiar with all of the details of the prior war; she had learned bits and pieces from Gabriel and Anselm over time, but it was still a somewhat vague picture of the previous conflict. It didn't truly matter—there was enough stake and enough pain in this war to last her a lifetime, but it would have been good to know more of what had befallen Dahlia de Mai and Inferni previously. She would know the enemy much better, at least. Even so, there were many amongst the coyotes who knew the prior war. Her lack of knowledge was no great detriment to the clan. “I doubt he'll have much luck turning any of the packs against us, still,” Kaena scoffed, thinking of her meetings with both the AniWayan and Miracles pack leaders. Though they'd both been pretty clear in their neutrality, both had also offered her some sort of support. The hybrid woman did not think that Inferni required allies, not even in warfare—but their assistance had been appreciated, to be certain.

“We'll put him in the grave yet,” the coyote said, her voice softer now, though it held a rigid determination somewhere within it, a quiet and certain will to triumph and have her vengeance. This was the thing within her that had driven her to return to this place so many times; perhaps if it were not for Salvaged Eternity and his wretched existence, she might have blown somewhere else entirely by now. But he had been the thing to draw her back above all the first time she'd come back, beyond Inferni and Zarah and whatever remnants of a past life the coyote clan had held for her once. That was, after all, why she had gone to Jaded Shadows' borders to seek him out rather than the clan's borders. She had visited Jaded Shadows as a rogue that day, a loner and a force all by her lonesome.

The coyote's pace wasn't particularly quick; there was something in her that felt she deserved this anxiousness, the awkwardness that she had perhaps forcibly placed between herself and the russet-furred woman. The other canine was was hurt and estranged by the distance as the monochrome-furred woman; perhaps this was even part of the reason Kaena inflicted this on herself, some vicious cycle of hurt she was destined to repeat. “Two weeks ago we burned part of their territory and fought them in the forest, but it wasn't enough. Of course, he lives,” she said, lamenting the last part of this admission. If only Haku had been mortally injured, if only he had burned to death in the flames. Nothing else really mattered; without the blue-eyed man, Dahlia would topple to the ground. Reconstruction would take precedence over the former king's quarrel with a neighbor.

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