First Day of My Life

POSTED: Wed Jan 21, 2009 11:30 pm


There had been one task she had been putting off since the founding of Dahlia de Mai and now it was complete. For the others it seemed to have come so easily, their choosing of a dwelling, it seemed that they all had one either in Berwick or Wolfville, but it had taken much longer for the ivory female to settle in. What had spurred her to finally give in, she wasn’t completely sure, but she guessed that it had something to do with the increasing need to be left alone. Both Hanna and Alexey had returned, and while seeing them both had lifted her spirits greatly, she hadn’t encountered the other wolves of Dahlia de Mai except in passing. And she hadn’t seen hide nor hair of Slay for the past two weeks. It seemed he truly had taken her request to heart.

The church she had found was outside the borders of Berwick, almost to St.Pepin’s vineyards and hidden from of sight by the towering willow trees and church grape vines right off the dirt road. The building was quite old but all the stain glass windows were intact and they had been the only part of the building Cercelee had bothered to clean, lovingly removing the dust from the colored panels. In the back of the church, where the human priest must have resided, was a small bedroom and a tiny kitchen with a fireplace. Here the windows were not stain glass and Cercelee lay on the worn, sinking bed staring out at the falling snow, completely alone.

POSTED: Thu Jan 22, 2009 12:23 am

Slaying the Dreamer ... ayeyes.jpg); background-position:top; background-repeat: no-repeat;">
OoC: Pretty table!

At first, the big male had been furious. Then he ran it off, and had a heart-to-heart talk with Hanna, and realized his mistake. Then he felt remorse, and guilt, and all those painful emotions that made him want to avoid everyone in the pack. More time had passed than he realized, and still Cercelee hadn't approached him, hadn't gone near the cemetery he camped out at. There had been no pack meetings since the group hunt, and Slay was beginning to feel worry niggling at him again, wondering how the Rosea was doing. Maybe she really doesn't want to see me again. Maybe she really is better off without me. Slay didn't want to drive Cer away from him, but now he had done just that, and felt that hypocritical need to win her back again.

"Or at least... see how she's doing," he rationalized out loud, making up his mind before entering town. The arctic wolf wandered through the empty streets of Wolfville, padding on all fours in the snowy surroundings. He caught traces of other packmates, none of the encounters recent enough to worry about, and tried to imagine what he'd find, if he'd say anything. Maybe it would be better if he just watched to see if she was alright, and if so, he could leave her be. She obviously didn't want to see him, so...? No, no, that was cowardly. He should at least let her know that he would still be around, that he had no plans of leaving the pack... of leaving her...

His pace quickened subconsciously, anxious to right the wrong he had committed. Things might not be the same between them, but anything would be better than no contact at all. He snuffled his way unsuccessfully through Berwick, and was ready to give up and ask someone for directions, when he caught her scent. It led off towards the barren vineyard, near where he had first met Firefly and Desaevio, towards a tall human building obscured by trees. Had she chosen a human dwelling for a den? That must mean she was shifted inside, like almost everyone else in their pack had chosen. He knew he couldn't put off learning the skill forever, especially when his companions were all so much more comfortable on two legs. It didn't disgust him like it used to; rather, it was a matter of needing help now. Becoming taller meant one's surroundings would be smaller - to a wolf uncomfortable with tight spaces, it was an unappealing prospect. He would definitely need to be walked through it. But that was neither here nor there...

Slay cautiously circled the church, recognizing the cross symbols present from the gravestones he was familiar with. He might be ignorant to the full connotation, but he could at least link the two together, and it brought a sad smile to his face. He missed her. His pale eyes sought movement through the colourful panes of glass, but there was nothing to be found. Was she not home? But there were no pawprints leaving the domicile...

His stature was large for a wolf, but quite short by human standards of course, and he could just barely peek into the last set of windowpanes, these unlike the others. He rose onto his hind legs, settling his front paws on the sill for balance, and blew on the glass, trying to defrost the rimed surface. When he could get a good look inside, he inhaled sharply, snowy ears back with embarrassment. There was Cercelee, staring right back at him from her bed!

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier

POSTED: Thu Jan 22, 2009 1:17 am


The fog that grew on the outside of the window pane startled her, but when it cleared and she saw the face of Slay her heart leapt into her throat. On and off she had spent the last two weeks trying not to think of him or their fight and here he was staring into her newly acquired home. His had been the last face she had expected to see, though she had imagined just this happening more than once. Rising slowly off the bed, Cercelee kept her gaze on Slay, as if to keep him fixed in place. What if he ran now that he saw her? What if his discovery of her had been an accident? Surely it couldn’t be, he must have caught her scent outside. Perhaps though he was just here to spy on her? Or even if he had come specifically to look for her what if he changed his mind?

Exiting the bed room and and moving through the kitchen, Cer placed her hand on the knob of the back door and the paused. The female had no idea what she would say to the male. Apologize? Certainly he deserved one. Ask him to leave? Their parting words still sting and she wasn’t sure if she was capable of dealing with this. Or could she just wait to see what he had to say? After all he had been the one to come here, after promising her that she wouldn’t see him again. Taking in a deep breath as if she were to plunge under water Cercelee turned the knob and found Slay still outside, only feet away from her now.

Standing on two legs with the male before her was awkward, and she almost found herself apologizing for having shifted. He had only seen her shifted once before that she could remember, briefly during the pack meeting, but always been four legged for him. There hadn’t been time to change though; in the moments it took her bones to reform themselves Slay could have changed his mind. Now there was no helping it and the longer she stared silently at him the more awkward the moment became. "Slay, what are you doing here?" It was almost a whisper, as if speaking too loudly might drive him off again.

POSTED: Thu Jan 22, 2009 3:41 pm

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"...Ah..." Slay cringed before her, awkward and embarrassed. His heart was racing in his chest -- his mind had gone blank at the sight of her, and now he had nothing to say. Her navy-blue eyes were questioning, tentative, hesitant -- there were no traces of anger left, and for that, he heaved a sigh of relief. She was taller than him, standing willowy on two legs, her soft white fur blending in with the ever-present snow... In her haste to meet him, Cercelee hadn't bothered to shift down. He had always been very conscious of the fact that she shifted around others, but made it a point to stay on his level when she could. He appreciated it. Now, though, it seemed strangely appropriate for her to be looking down on him... He didn't want to be big and tall right now.

Slay, what are you doing here?

He could ask himself the same question. He had been so rude to her on the beach, the place she used to love and probably wouldn't anymore. She had clearly been alone since that time -- there were no traces of any scent except for dusty church. Remorse flooded his system, and he averted his pale eyes, seeming to fold in on himself. "I... I didn't mean... That is, Cercelee, I..." his husky voice trailed off as the words failed him a second time. If he couldn't say anything, would she get angry again? Would she just sigh and walk away, giving up on him for good? She looked so very fragile, the icy winds dusting her eyelashes with snowflakes. If he pushed her, she might break...

"Cercelee, if you don't want to see me again, just let me know. I only came here to apologize, b-because, I didn't mean what I said... Didn't mean to hurt your feelings, if, if that's what happened... so... I..." There, at least he had gotten some of it out. He swallowed the lump in his throat, snow-capped ears back at a shy angle, ebony tail hanging limply behind him. He was still nursing his own bruised pride - it took two to argue - but if she knew he was remorseful, she couldn't abandon him for good... right?

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier

POSTED: Fri Jan 23, 2009 2:28 am


Slay was so flustered, so unsure of his speech and this did not comfort Cer at all. Suddenly she realized that they both felt as if they were walking on thin ice, one wrong step and they might crash through and that would be the end. The white lady did not like the uneasiness between them, did not like the confused feelings floating in her own stomach and the unsureness in Slay’s words. Towering above him only made it all the more uncomfortable, she was no better than him and though it was just a physical difference that made her literally look down on him she yearned to be on the same level as him. Shifting now would be too awkward so she had to listen to what he said from higher up. Cercelee was hungry for his voice, the words he spoke, eager but scared to know why he had come, but all she wore on her face was a look of concern.

Relief flooded over her when she heard the stuttered apology. His coming here had not been an accident and there was no ill intent behind it, even if she still deserved his scorn. Shame flooded her that he was the first to apologize, she after all had started the fight, he had merely ended it, and now he was ending the silence and space that had been wedge between them for the past two weeks. It seemed he was still trying to stammer out words, when Cercelee broke in gently. "Shhh... it’s okay Slay." Hesitantly and nervously she peered at him, her voice almost shaking, still so soft as if it tried to mimic the softness of the snow."Would you... like to come in?"

Cercelee turned back into the warm kitchen before Slay could even respond, leaving the door open for him to enter. She had a home now and she wanted to welcome Slay into it, back into her life, if he refused her she didn’t want to face the rejection head on. The Rosea could handle being left by herself in the house, but she could not bare to hear “no” in any form it might take. Moving into a corner she quickly went into shifting back to her natural form, how Slay liked her. She owed him that much, she could change for him.

POSTED: Fri Jan 23, 2009 9:29 pm

Slaying the Dreamer ... ayeyes.jpg); background-position:top; background-repeat: no-repeat;">
Slay sighed in relief as Cercelee's gentle voice bade him to relax, that things would be okay between them. All the hesitation, uncertainty, walking on eggshells -- he wanted so badly for it all to evaporate, for the two of them to laugh like maniacs and chase each other around like they had. Things hadn't been this formal the first time they met, and somehow, now they had slipped this far? It was because neither of them wanted to fight again, wanted to go near the topic of fighting, in case those ugly feelings reared their heads a second time.

Ethereal, like a ghost, Cercelee slipped through the doorway, leaving the white behind. Obediently, Slay trotted at her heels, leaving the door open behind him. The cold air seeped into the unused kitchen, swirling snowflakes onto the stone floor. His nails made a clicking sound as he drew to a halt, realizing in surprise that Cer was shifting back down again.

"..." The arctic wolf watched silently, fascinated as always by the unnatural process. "I... You didn't have to do that, Cer," he murmured, easing nearer to her as she completed the process, "...but I'm glad you did." He smiled shyly, happy to see her again for real. His ebony-daubed tail gave a stir, tentatively waving from the tip. Did this mean he was forgiven? Was this her apology as well, letting him into her new home? He was the last, then, to still stubbornly sleep without a den... but maybe he could drop by here, from time to time...?

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier

The "C" on my keyboard is sticking so badly, and there are so many "C"s in this post because of Cer's name... xD

POSTED: Sun Jan 25, 2009 12:36 am

Haha, sorry for all the “c”s. This is short!

He was in, he had followed her and caught the last half of her transformation. Turning to face him, her heart beating quickly, she smiled hesitantly. "I wanted to." Cercelee bowed her head, unwilling to look at Slay directly for the next part, not because she didn’t mean it but because she was still ashamed of how she had acted. "I also want to apologize for how I acted... you didn’t deserve that." Cercelee had known that then, but she had been unable to stop herself.

It wasn’t her place to care whether he had a stupid crush or not, or illegitimate puppies or anything of the sort. Cercelee would have to remind herself of that in the future, knowing well enough that they were just friends, even if it felt otherwise at times. Clearing her throat and making eye contact again, she still spoke softly, not wanting to run him off. "Will you stay here with me for a while?" He couldn’t leave again, not just yet.

POSTED: Sun Jan 25, 2009 1:24 am

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"Of course!" Slay blurted too quickly. "That is, if you don't mind," he back-pedaled, realizing he sounded far too eager. Still, he had just been so worried that she wouldn't give him the time of day. Getting a second chance after everything had spiraled away so quickly... It was more than he had hoped for.

Was he supposed to make small talk? Since she had invited him indoors, should he compliment her on the house, congratulate her for settling in? It wasn't really his style, but he let his eyes wander anyway, looking for something to start a topic. He could see the strange patterns of light those colourful windows cast on the floors as the snowflakes drifted in and out of view... Everything inside was dusty, except for the crystalline glass. Slay felt the beginnings of a smirk, finding it amusing that she had apparently given up after such a short effort. He would have done the same.

"Listen, Cercelee - I've been thinking, and, I wanted to ask you something. Don't get upset! I'll answer anything you want to know too, as long as you'll hear me out..." Slay bit his lip, anxiously trying to hold her gaze with his worried pale eyes. If he could get this off of his chest, it would be so much easier to relax, for the both of them. He wouldn't feel like his insides were trying to create an intricate knot, and maybe then she wouldn't look so painfully fragile, with that shy, sad voice.

"I... I think I did deserve that, y-your being angry, because I wasn't being fair to you. I didn't mean to say that you couldn't have other friends, or, th-that you couldn't... like them... Is... there someone you like here, Cer? I'm not gonna yell, not ever again, so please tell me, and, I'll be okay with whatever you say..." Now he couldn't look at her anymore. He suppressed a nervous yawn, drowsiness offering to put him to sleep in place of this ever-so-awkward conversation. Usually it would be more tactful to ask a girl's friends these sort of questions, but to the best of his knowledge, Cer didn't have those sorts of friends. If she said yes, he would have to back off... Better to remain her companion than be shut out completely, right...? If she could be happy...

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier

POSTED: Sun Jan 25, 2009 2:06 am

Bwahahah she is going to chain him down!

The pounding heart of the female nearly leapt out of her chest at his response. He would stay, he wasn’t angry with her any longer, she wasn’t angry with him any longer... yet their meeting still did not feel normal. They were still dancing around one another, pathetically trying to avoid stepping on the other’s toes. "Of course I don’t mind." Cercelee moved toward the open door, the snow still blowing in, and nudge it closed with her snout. The movement had brought her closer to Slay and she quickly moved back to her original position, averting her eyes for a moment, shy again at the lack of space between them.

Cercelee unconsciously let her ears fall flat against her skull as the male begin to speak, his nervousness made her nervous. Maybe she didn’t want to hear the question, maybe it would upset her. Yet the question came anyway and Cercelee had no idea how to answer it. The question Slay provided her with was as good as admitting he had been jealous, which pleased her. He was referring to Ril’o though, that had been the name through about in their argument, and she knew it. Did she like Ril’o? He was a pleasant wolf, she counted him among her friends, but he hadn’t sparked that sort of interest in her, not really.

"I don’t know." The words came out pleading, as if to ask him not to make her answer. Maybe if she allowed herself enough time around Ril’o she would develop those feelings, but part of her had always wondered so about Slay. Part of her knew it about Slay. Yet he was her friend, best friend in fact, and she couldn’t jeopardize losing that over some silly crush. Cercelee wasn’t ready to tell him that, admit it out loud, whether it would inflate his ego or scare him off. "What about you?" Maybe he would want to tell her either, she hadn’t been fair, she hadn’t told him. Without waiting for his reply more words blurted out of mouth, her eyes widening once she had finished and realized what she asked him. "Slay, what if you stay here with me... I don’t mean for a while, I mean always."

POSTED: Sun Jan 25, 2009 11:07 pm

Slaying the Dreamer ... ayeyes.jpg); background-position:top; background-repeat: no-repeat;">
OoC: Ah ha ha, serves him right for being indecisive!

She closed the door... Slay felt a moment of claustrophobia, the walls looming over him, the narrow kitchen corridor too small, too tight... but it passed as he swallowed it down, breathing deeply and watching the windows. This tall-ceilinged building had far more space that the tiny dens outdoors, or the cave he kept trying to forget about. The short moment he spent wrestling with his thoughts made him miss how quickly Cercelee returned to her original spot, avoiding the close proximity. When he glanced up again, it was as though she had never moved.

When he had finished stammering his question, the arctic wolf had been staring down at his paws. When she spoke, desperation in her plea, his gaze flicked back up to meet hers. Why did she sound so... helpless? 'I don't know...' How do you not know if you like someone, he wondered with a touch of resentment. That feeling was suddenly squashed as it dawned on him... His own feelings.

Would I stay here... always?

Slay inhaled sharply as Cercelee blurted out, so easily, the thing he had wanted all along but couldn't wrap his mind around it. In the short time he had been here, so much had happened - when they were together. The protectiveness he felt about her, both regarding her friendships and her dangerous position; the light-hearted fun they shared together, with no one else; the righteous anger that had burned in his chest when she was injured during the war, his own subsequent breakdown, and then the all-encompassing relief he had felt when she came back into his life... Friends didn't feel this way about each other. And if they did, with this much conviction, then they were just ignoring the fact that this was something more. Cercelee was a girl who looked past all appearances, who ignored rank, and had accepted him from the start. She was... well, perfect.

"I... Well... Cercelee, are you really asking me...?" Slay breathed incredulously, cringing as her eyes widened with shock. She hadn't meant to ask him to... to move in together, to... live together... to be together forever? Did she? She still hadn't answered his question, and now he wasn't certain how she felt about anything, let alone... him...

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier

POSTED: Mon Jan 26, 2009 6:14 pm

I... Well... Cercelee, are you really asking me...? Cercelee licked her lips and averted her gaze. It was true that she hadn’t meant to say it, not like that, not at this time. Yet it was also true that she wanted it, had thought about it more than once, believed it would make her happy. Knew it would make her happy. He hadn’t said yes though. He doubted her, that she meant it, that she wanted it. Or maybe he just didn’t want to. Possibly he was stalling for time, trying to find an easy way out. If she said no, she wasn’t really asking, they he would be off the hook. He wouldn’t have to reject her, break her heart, she knew that even if he didn’t want her, he didn’t want to hurt her. The idea of just taking it all back crossed her mind, just to keep Slay from having to say no.

"I..." The words were on the tip of her tongue. I don’t know why I said that, forgive me Slay. Yet she couldn’t bring herself to say them. Cercelee found that it was impossible to lie to him, to lie to herself. "Yes, I am really asking you." Her words were firm, clear, her voice strong. Exhaling a breath she didn’t know she had been holding she smiled hesitantly at Slay. "If you don’t want to, that’s okay. We’ll just forget I asked and go back to how things were before, before now and before the fight... if that’s what you want." Cer had no idea what Slay wanted, but she wanted him to be happy, even if that meant rejecting her and making a fool out of her.

POSTED: Mon Jan 26, 2009 10:00 pm

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Cercelee hesitated, he saw it. Crestfallen, he waited for her to retract her offer, to pretend the tension between them was nothing, to deny that they cared. But... she didn't. Hope rose inside his chest, welling up as she looked him square in the eyes and repeated it. Now there was the confident little lady he knew and... loved...

The familiar lop-sided smirk began to play on his lips, his pale eyes sparkling. "You do know what you're getting yourself into, m'dear... I sleep my days away, I'll eat you out of house and home, I'm the laziest wolf in the pack... But it's too late, now." He finished drawling, and rose to his paws, slowly closing the distance between them. His heart was racing, but he couldn't let his nerves show now - it was his chance to seize the day.

Pacing in slow circles around her, the big wolf leaned in close to whisper in her ear as he walked past. "It's too late to take it back and pretend it didn't happen, Cer. Now you're stuck with me. I'll be living in your home, always near you. You can't hide your problems from me, and I can't run away from you. And nobody... gets to see you... unless I let them..." He gave her ear a little teasing nip before circling again, gazing down at her deep navy-blue eyes, like a starless night sky, or the deepest waters of the ocean. Would he be that possessive? Well... Cer was an independent young lady, and she could certainly boss him around whenever she pleased. But Slay wasn't entirely joking -- if he was to stay with her, then he wanted a say in her life, too. He wanted to be more than just her friend. And if she was giving him this opportunity, then...

"'ll be mine, forever..."

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier

POSTED: Wed Jan 28, 2009 2:40 am

Mate icons now or should Slay be all formal and “pop the question” XD

He broke from his frozen stance and quickly closed the distance that spanned between them. The male circling made her dizzy, in a happy way she couldn’t remember feeling before. How had they gotten to this? From casting aside their friendship in a fit of anger to staring in each other’s eyes, planning a life together? Her head swam and her heart pounded in her chest. When she felt the nip on her ear she felt as if she would melt. Everything was falling into place, all the silly senseless flirting they had done with each other since that first day. Cercelee was beginning to think perhaps none of it had been so senseless afterall.

His eyes were locked into her and she broke into a grin, mirroring his own. Slowly she brought her nose closer to his until they were touching, flicking her tongue out quickly to graze his lips and nose before quickly withdrawing again. Dealing with males, especially in this fashion, was not something she had experience with and it was all she could do to keep from giggling happily and foolishly. "I’ll be yours, for as long as you want… but you know what you’re getting into right?"

The both had their faults that the other would have to acknowledge and accept, and perhaps their would even be disagreements along the way but to Cer that was not currently a possibility, nothing could curb her joy. Teasingly she spoke, her eyes glittering at the two toned male. "I can deal with all that, though the pack might not like it so much if you keep me locked up all the time. However you know this means that it’s just me and you… no one else… we’ll have to curb the flirting…"Her voice was teasing, but part of it was honest. She could stand a little, if it was all in fun and games, but to ever feel she was second best in his mind, even if only for a second, that just would not do. "I need a lot of attention you know... and I have a lot of duties… you will have to share me sometimes…"The white lady drew closer, leaning her head against his broad shoulder, his fur thick and warm against her face. "You still want me forever?"

POSTED: Wed Jan 28, 2009 5:46 pm

Slaying the Dreamer ... ayeyes.jpg); background-position:top; background-repeat: no-repeat;">
OoC: Oh, I gotta make it official. x3 Slay can be romantic when he puts his mind to it!

It was all happening so quickly, but for the first time in his life, Slay wasn't about to dig his heels in and run away from what he could not control. He felt strangely light, as though if he stopped moving, he would drift up off the floor, rising lazily like a cloud to circle the church rafters. The memory of their first meeting, wandering a field of flowers, made one of the first things he said to her resurface in his mind. "Cercelee... Such a lovely name, for such a lovely lady. It will certainly be my honor to accompany you, as your bodyguard and your boon companion."

"...Of course I know what I'm getting into, my dovely. I wouldn't have it any other way." The touch of her tongue, warm and unprovoked, made a shiver chase down his spine. He had never had the pleasure of being intimate with a woman, and now that she had admitted she loved him and he knew he felt the same, her very scent was enticing beyond belief. He had to resist returning her kiss immediately, lest he push her to go too quickly. Wolves did not have a sense of what was demure, what was modest - there was simply right and wrong, the right time to love, the wrong place to show weakness, the right time to bear a litter, the wrong time to see another female. This was the right girl, he knew; but some small part of him told him it would be the wrong time to get too close, lest she back down too soon. He settled for easing into her embrace, letting his noble muzzle nestle into her silken white ruff as she leaned into his shoulder.

"...Heheh. I'll try to curb the flirting if you will, too - just know that I'm too jealous to share you for long... If your duties take you away from here, I will follow you. Don't assume work is a valid excuse to whisk you away... I need as much attention as you do." His voice was a deep rumble of contentment, more at ease with his surroundings and his place in life than he had ever remembered feeling, even as a child. Being able to cheerfully admit to his flaws, to the problems he would cause her, and having her still willing to caress him... He hadn't realized the depth to his loneliness, until he had something - someone - to fill the void. Her warm body pressed up against his, and he sighed, drowning in her scent.

"You still want me forever?"

That last light-hearted offer to back out of the commitment made him smile. Letting his pale blue eyes flutter shut, he let his voice drop to a husky whisper, for her ears only. He had to trust her not to break his heart. "I want you, Cercelee. I want you forever and today, all to myself. Will you... take me as your mate?"

I've got soul but I'm not a soldier

POSTED: Fri Jan 30, 2009 5:08 pm

Wee they are so adorable!

The white lady couldn’t help but grinning at the male. Yes, he would curb the flirting and she would have to too. Ril’o and Sankor came to mind, he hadn’t even known of her day with Sankor but it did not matter now. Cercelee vowed to be his forever after this day, the other males and what silly feelings they might have caused in the Rosea were history. If he had days such as those, with other females, Cercelee did not need to know, they were over with, so long as there were no more in the future. The alabaster women did not doubt for a moment that both of them could put those behind them, this was too important not to. They had been working at this for a long time, since that first day they had met. It was time to enjoy the rewards of their work. Cercelee wasn’t going to let her jealousy stand in the way of that.

It was bliss just leaning into him, letting him support her, keeping her standing up, both physically and emotionally. The warmth of his body felt delightful against her own and she felt as if she couldn’t get enough, if there was any way to lean in closer to the male she could have, but since they could not mesh into one being she was content to just stand against him, enveloped in his scent and feeling the rise and fall of his chest and he breathed. His voice came and the deep sound of it caused her to shake happily. The words even more so. Of course, they had already sealed the deal informally but his proposal sent her through the roof. There had been a time when she imagined she’d never hear the words.

Pulling away from him, and immediately missing the closeness, she smiled into his eyes. The pale blue eyes matched up perfectly with her own dark navy eyes. "Yes. Of course. I wouldn’t have it any other way." Again she offered him a wolfish kiss, not caring if this was not the way to do these sort of things. Neither she or him had any real experience with it and for that she was grateful. First real loves were to be cherished more highly than any other, even if by some turn of fate they became separated at least he would remember her as such and she him.

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