It was unlike the girl to venture far from home, but she had been feeling out of place and uneasy inside the borders. Restless, and unhappy. But she couldn’t place what it was. In the past there was a simple reason for her foul mood, and now it just seemed like everything was wrong. So the female walked with a slow and undetermined pace though a territory that was off limited in her mind. The city was filled with things that Mati found frightening, but it was also home to all the things that she needed. Those things would fill her time and for the moment given her that satisfied feeling that she desired. With more supplies the more she could complete. And a finished task always felt pleasant. But even those things had lost their true luster. A painted picture, done to the best of her ability and looking as perfect as her hand could make. It didn’t have the same sense of prided as it once did. She had dozens now, flowers, animals, all sorts of birds, Haven Manor. None of them spoke to her. Her muse was faltering.

So she wandered, noon turning into dusk and the air grew cold with a winter chill. Another season dead, birthing the most sullen of them all. Yes, winter had plenty of colors, none that Mati missed. But they weren’t easy to find and too often it looked and felt as if death had simply rolled over the lands and they would never see a true color again. She didn’t want to be reminded of that demise, among leafless trees and a brown landscape. The city was always the same, covered in gray and for once Mati didn’t mind its repetitiveness. She turned the corner; foot paws carrying her over the broken concrete and stone. Idly she read the building’s faded sign and thought maybe there would be something she could use inside of it. The door was jammed, but was no match for the woman’s strength. The Earthen hued Church girl opened it, and stepped into the dim light.

        
        

There were few windows in the room she entered, and tables that lined one of the walls made the woman stop in her tracks. She shouldn’t be here, Mati knew it. There was a sense of familiarly in the human’s place. It was dusty and dark and Mati wanted to go home. Home where there was security and her books and paints. Not in a place that was so different, so foreign. But she didn’t move, facing the fear that swelled within. No, she needed to stop running. The tall woman hesitated to take a step forward; they were only tables, not lab benches and chalkboards. The University was so vary far from here…


        
She looked at the podium that stood at the door, and thin books that littered the ground and then waked past it. Their where chairs, and tables with attacked cushioned seating. Old dingy glasses sat on a few of the tabletops and Mati began to find the place more intriguing then frightening. Maybe there was something to be found here, something that she would never find at the Manor. The Church wolfess thought about taking another step, but instead picked up one of the thin books on the podium and began to read the title. It seemed French, but she wasn’t certain. Opening it she began to read the first line when the door opened behind her and she was suddenly not alone.


        
The brown woman jumped, startled by the strangers sudden approach. Her breath was caught in her throat and she stifled a scream. She opened her eyes and turned her body to find the amber gaze staring at her. Too surprised to say anything in response, Mati stood there for a long moment. Her heart beat fiercely from the shock and she fought to catch her breath. “No..” She blurted, one paw on her chest in case her heart tried to escape. Eyes finally able to see beyond the fright Mati found a lady-yote with more then one article in her possession. “Its okay.” she lied, not feeling alright what so ever. Perhaps she would if her heart just stopped racing.


        

        
Her heart finally stopped pounding in her chest from the fright. Thankfully her chest had not tightened and choked her as it had when she was younger. The pain of it was never as horrible as the embarrassment it brought, and she felt humiliated enough with the startle that . Mati took a stepped back to give the newcomer more room in the doorway, and even managed a smile as the woman spoke again. “Me too” Mati replied as the stranger spoke of the wind. The fey smelt of Inferni, with having just been shuttled away from their borders not too long ago Mati found her interesting and another sort of surprise. Though she wore the color of coyote ad the shape of a wolf, she still didn’t seem to dislike Mati’s “kind”. As the male she had met described.



        Her question made Mati confused, and being too frazzled to chance looking foolish again she automatically agreed. “Sure.” the painter spoke. Smoking wasn’t that bad, right? Even though she didn’t really know what was smoked Mati was all to certain the huffing substances up her nose was far worse, and booze could bee bad too, a little smoke had to be harmless. “Mati Church” She introduced herself to the new friend with a grander smile, finding the female far more pleasant and laid back then the other Inferni member she had known. Mati moved through the restaurant to one of the tables that were placed along the wall. She found the need to sit and let her nerves settle, the chairs were strewn across the floor, so the dreamer sat along the wall on the cushioned bench.



        

        
Mati was always more likely to trust another female then she ever would a male. The father figures she had in her life were sweet, and yet not as active and present as she would hope. She found the females she spent her days with to be figures of authority, strong and always kind. If Rikka had been a male seek refuge from the wind and winter chill, Mati would have excused herself quickly. But Mati could smile at the woman’s kind words, agree that the world was missing it natural heater and that winter was always too harsh on the Earth’s creatures. “Snow isn’t far away.” Mati added, a small smile on her lips. They would soon be seeking fire and blankets, not just a roof over head and a way to get out of the wind.

        Rikka spoke, unrestrained and causally. It was a subtle and yet nice change, rather then the formal introductions that might be seen as polite. Sitting beside her in the restaurant’s booth Mati watched as she searched her bad for what ever she needed for them to smoke. The Dreamer was new to all of this, only understanding what drugs could do to you and never understanding what you actually did to get that way. Drinking was so much easier, though she had only drank a few times and never much. When the golden hued canine handed over the match and white papered roll Mati only looked at her with large eyes. “No, you go ahead” her voice tried to hide the unknowing as well as the curiosity that surrounded the cigarette looking thing. She needed to see how it all happened, before trying it herself. But with the new experience she no longer felt the startle Rikka had first instilled in her. Only curiosity filled her violet eyes.

        300+

        
Winter tended to suck, or so Mati figured since so many didn’t like it. Yeah, it was cold most of the time, and being snowed in was a pain. The lack of food was generally the worst. But, there were snow forts, and snowball fights, an excuse to have a roaring fire, and never ending supply of fresh water right outside her window. The colors of winter were bright and reflected so much of the sun and sky that at times is was hard to decide which way was up. Rikka was so very right, it was only another phase in something that was so much larger then all of them. It was the gift of renewal, and if there was not the freeze of winter, how could they bask in the thaw of spring and the birth of summer?

        
Violet eyes watched eagerly as the woman moved with a practiced grace. The match smelled heavily and its sent filled their small space of the booth. The Dreamer tried to hide her wonderment, though she figured it was something to inhale through her mouth. Of course she knew that much. The tip of the joint lit and glowed as Rikka inhaled. It was the smell of the rolled paper’s guts that now filled the booth and the room with fragrance. Mati would that it tickled her nose at first, spicy and intriguing. Then, the exhale. The puff of smoke rose and Mati stole a small glimpse as it filtered into the clear air around them.

        
It was her turn, and she took the joint as if it was anything else. Purple eyes looked at it, and the brought it to her lips. She inhaled with her lips tight around it and felt the burn at the back of her throat. The smoke was caught in her chest for a moment, seeping into her airways before being coughed out. She handed the Inferni member the doobie while her other hand held her chest.

        Holy shit

        300+

        
Normally Mati would let her mind wander, reflect on the aspects of each moment or let it drift to the past as she was often reminded of her own complex issues when meeting others. But, not right now. Her eyes watered, small tear that formed and fall to the soft fur of her face. Her head felt light and dizzy. Was it the pot? Or was it the lack of air her brain was receiving that made her want to close her eyes and keep the tears from forming. She was caught in the moment, and huffed a last few feeble coughs as the other female patted her back and spoke an apology. Mati inhaled deeply, leaning backwards and opening her eyes.
“Its okay.” She commented as her breath returned and she began to feel the burn of her chest and lungs ease. It was then that the Dreamer could truly feel the small filtered haze that hovered behind her eyes.

        

“It kind’a burns.” She commented with a grin and a small laugh filtering through each word. It did, but it also felt really nice. Calming, Mati figured. Still se was unsure exactly what was inside the small white paper, but the scent of herbs and spice made her believe that it was something very natural. It didn’t seem too bad, and nothing like the white powder that her mother had used. Violet eyes watched as the clan member took another puff, eyeing her slow and calm technique. She had been too rushed, even with her hesitation. The brown furred woman took the joint as it was passed, asking just before she let it touch her lips.
“You do this often?” She was certainly curious to know, though perhaps Rikka would be distracted in searching for the answer and not notice Mati fumble once more.

        300+

        
She took the puff, slower and softer then before. Mati breathed in, holding the inhale for a few moments as she had seen Rikka do and then let it slowly flow from her nose. It didn’t burn at all this time, and it felt as if the smoke had run strait to her head. It settled there, maker her body light and fluid. The tickle in her chest was still real and alive but she could cough it out with a light huff and then it was gone entirely. Rikka was right, as she coached Mati through the new experience. It was easier, and thankfully she had watched the more experienced creature closely. Mati smiled, though it wasn’t as if there had been anything funny or amusing said. It felt pleasant to simply smile.

        
Her ears swiveled to take in the woman’s new thoughts. Violet eyes wandered around the room they sat in, her fingers pointing in the direction of the coy colored femme in order to give the joint back. Mati like this, especially as the burning in her chest melted away. Her thoughts were still clear, but they felt fuzzy around the edges and their meaning was dulled. When she felt the elbow touch her side she looked back to the gold eyes that watched her. The touch tickled slightly, and a spot of laughter got caught in her throat.

        
“Back to Inferni?” Mati asked, though the answer was obvious. Without thinking Mati leaned back against the soft fabric of the booth, wandering how it would be to live in the coyote clan. “It must be hard living there.” She spoke without really thinking much about being polite, though her voice was filled with honest concern. She couldn’t picture the lovely sounding canine living behind the skull and bones fence.

        300+

        
Even with the problems Mati had faced as a pup concerning her chest, the burning feeling was beginning to dull and soon became nonexistent. There was no tight feeling, and she was slowly relaxing, though the company had that affect on her as well. There was nothing uptight or proper about the female that sat beside her, and Mati was becoming more fond of the golden wolfess the longer she sat next to her. Perhaps that had all been stress related. As a youngster Mati had faced a few upsetting situations, and her breathing had been irregular during those experiences. First she had been attacked within the Dreamer’s border, and then in the University. But as she inhaled the aftermath that floated around them, Mati found that there was not even a hiccup tickling her chest. It brought another small smile to her face, and she watched Rikka take her next hit and listened eagerly to her words. Her eyes no longer roamed the room, which had turned up quite dull in her search for something interesting. Instead she focused on the company that had been kind enough to share her stash.

        
Taking the joint, Mati slowly inhaled from the burning dubbie while she listened. Again Mati did not rush herself, calmly puffing and this time tasting the herb on her tongue. Moments before she had only focused on the pain in her lungs but now the artist was looking at the drug in every light.

        
The Church female could easily see that Rika did not belong among the coyote clan. With further examination she found that Rikka was shaped more like a wolf then a coyote, larger and with smaller ears. But that was just the outer part. Beyond the golden façade there was a soft heart and someone who did not seem to enjoy chopped heads as fence posts. Mati thought back to the male whom she had met there, and the skull he was carrying. It was rugged and certainly horrible, no matter if Mati had found it slightly intriguing at the time. It was wrong, those heads had once belonged to wolves. Rikka would belong to a pack that did such things? But… as Mati listened further it seemed like she was there for her family. Right, that made sense. Their eyes met as Rikka asked Mati about her own kin.
“Messed up too.” The Dreamer simply spoke.
“I have two moms, one was addicted to some sort drug or what not.” Mati raised a hand and waved it to indicate that she was unsure what sort of drug it was. Like it mattered.
“The other, well she's alright.” at the moment Mati couldn’t think of anything abnormal to say about Anu.

        

“But, nothing like heads on spikes.” she added, thinking back to that day. At least they didn’t kill other canines, though she was certain that Savina could fly off the hook at times. But part of her was sure she hadn’t killed anyone. It was odd to think about, and slightly morbid. Still Mati remained oddly calm as she let the thoughts roam her mind.

        


With the next puff Mati could not help it, and could not control her wandering mind. It was like a wall had been lifted. Or, no! Broken by the lazy smoke that lingered in the air around them. Ideas came to her, colors even were seen differently, brighter in the dim light of the building. The sun filtered though the dingy and grimy windows, and still she could see each that had been woven into the fabrics and the small commercial pieces that lined the walls. It was amazing to know that there was another way to preserve the world, she could wear different eyes and discover things that were hidden when her mind was locked in a sober state.

        
Perhaps the heads that lined Inferni’s borders were not that ugly, if she looked at them now. Mati didn’t know if she could find something new in them while in the freedom haze. Still, as she glanced back at the golden wolfess it seemed so difficult to picture her standing behind them, hating wolves with the rest of those that lived there. Her voice broke Mati’s train of though, and the girl nodded at the question. Her puphood had been a wonderful time, and before she ventured away from home she had known nothing but love.
“We were all very happy.” Mati added with a soft smile, wishing that the same happiness would return to her life.

        
Her comment made Mati think of Cambria. Briefly the female’s face was held before her mind’s eyes and yet when she saw her it was not the puppy that Mati had cared for. She blinked,
“And dangerous.” adding the comment and thinking of the pain addiction had brought.

        
That the woman’s higher tone Mati laughed softly, yeah they would all be better if no one wore bones or enjoyed decapitated each other. It was a silly thing to enjoy. Sunshine, rainbows, singing birds and flowers were small things that could bring joy. Not death and blood and guts. Taking the joint Mati felt the misguided hand and looked to the Inferni female as she spoke. “Thanks.” Mati returned. No one had ever complimented her hair, not that she worked for it or anything. Eyes went to Rikka’s own, and without much second thought she simply said.
“Yours is the color sunflower petals, lighter though at the ends, like the hazy outer edge of the sun on a summer day.” A pause,
“Its pretty.” her voice was soft and she looked away knowing that she had let her color obsession get the best of her. Another puff, she held her breath and willed the grass to take root.

        

Her time as a pup had been happy, filled with unconditional love, bedtime stories, games and fun with her siblings. It had not been tainted with the knowledge that she received once she had grown. Though she wouldn’t have understood, Mati was glad to have gone without knowing who her father was and what he had done until she was older. The pain and anger that had ensued while she mother was pregnant was something that Mati never wished to think of. And to think that maddened blood ran through her veins, and the veins of her siblings brought a major unease to the Dreamer. But as Rikka commented that pups deserved nothing but pleasantries she nodded and spoke in agreement,
“Yeah. They do.” Maybe she would have her own, and Mati would remember those little things that they needed.


        
Mati had always been scared of the drugs her mother had used, and frightened that she would become addicted and never to right again. Oddly she hadn’t worried when she began to toke with Rikka, and she was relieved to know that there was nothing harmful about what they smoked. At the time she simply trusted the female, and took what she had been given in hopes of relaxing and enjoying herself. It was certainly working, and now that she knew she would be fine and happy in the morning Mati could truly relax and enjoy herself. “Thanks, thats good to know!” She added, a smile on her lips. Her tipped the joint back to the woman, now much smaller then it had been when they began.


        
Embarrassment washed over her, the high only dulling it and not killing it completely. She had gone over board, and Mati placed and hand over her face in humiliation, but the things Rikka said weren’t to mock her, but compliment her further. Removing it she looked at the honey eyes that watched her so closely. “What’s a commune?” she asked as the other explained a bit of her past. Mati had never heard of such a thing and she wondered what sort of place would name someone after a flower.


        
Mati didn’t know what to say, never having a creature speak to her just as she thought. She thought her coat dull, and the same as dirt. So now they were the Sun and the Earth? Fingers reach for the golden strand before she knew her arm had moved. They were close, closer then Mati had ever been with another wolf, and she didn’t even notice. “Its kinda like the way fresh tilled dirt looks in the morning.” She admitted. If Rikka was the petal of a flower, then Mati would be the dit if grew in. And the wolfess had absolutely no idea why.