11-02-2011, 08:35 PM
XD Poor Gemma, she has many many issues XD
7+
Comfort. A foreign concept to her now. When had been the last time she had received such a blessing? Months ago, a night spent out on the mountains at a stupid time in the morning with a man who held a solid dislike for coyotes. Her enlarged ears and slim pointed muzzle told the tale of her dual heritage but had Gemma ever considered herself anything more than a cross breed, something of a freak, born from a illicit relationship between predator and prey. She was no fool, she knew that coyotes were food for wolves. So being both which category did she fall into? Hunter or hunted.
Still his contact was accepted, cherished even despite the rocky ground their relationship stood on. A nice and fucked up one it was too. He loved her and she loved him back but she also hated him because he loved another, she hated him again over for tossing her aside yet she'd sleep with him in a heartbeat if he ever offered regardless of how it would damage her and tear at her heart to see him go back to his other afterwards. Then there was the danger zone that was his brother, she didn't even know what to classify that as. Everything was so royally screwed up in so many different ways.
He wanted her here? It was nice to be wanted for once. He brushed against her and the touch was returned if only in a small way. Her head pushed back gently against his, accepting and complacent for the time being. Mentioning of the gods and their games had her teeth flashing at the fire, aimless and misplaced anger,
"Sometimes? The gods are always cruel, always ruthless and always mocking. They are not content to see me suffer from the evils already performed upon me, they insist on loading me with more and more." The pale fae knew what she was talking about, experienced laced her voice that was heavy with bitterness. Ears folded back against her blonde hair, the roots were beginning to show through the dye now, she couldn't care less. Where had the woman who seemed so carefree and happy gone? She was bound now, bound and gagged. Left in a darkened room to rot and descend slowly into madness.
The man shifted again and an inquisitive audit perked up from its slumber to follow him around, even within her despair and sorrow did his presence command her attention. She could no more resist the desire to follow his movements than she could her attraction to his fur coloring. Warmth flooded her that had nothing to do with the fire and everything to do with the furry chest now pressed against her back, the arms that encircled her and the head laid on her shoulder, she leaned backwards into the embrace that he dangled before her and gave herself over to him, allowing herself to pretend just for now that he really did care. Did she have strength enough to carry on after this night, to go through her life knowing that she had once again failed and that any notion of her being a good mother was shot to pieces. She could see them all, a plethora of bodies that paraded themselves past her vision, she knew every face, every scent by memory and she would never forget.
Instead of answering his declaration, it would never hold true in the light of day, she asked a question of her own despite already knowing the answer, rhetorical but still questing for a reply,
"I've never told anyone about my history. Where this whore comes from, how she got here." Her face twisted into a mask of pain as loathing filled her words, she couldn't deal with it on her own anymore, she needed to share it. After all this time keeping it contained, the hatred and anger had started to fester and decompose, it hurt and she knew it always would. The injustices done to her would never fade from her life and disappear just like the scars she carried would never heal, carved into her by force and evil. When she was young and stupid she had thought herself very special, gifted even when she had been worse than useless, she still was in fact. To this day the woman had never learned to hunt for herself.
7+
Comfort. A foreign concept to her now. When had been the last time she had received such a blessing? Months ago, a night spent out on the mountains at a stupid time in the morning with a man who held a solid dislike for coyotes. Her enlarged ears and slim pointed muzzle told the tale of her dual heritage but had Gemma ever considered herself anything more than a cross breed, something of a freak, born from a illicit relationship between predator and prey. She was no fool, she knew that coyotes were food for wolves. So being both which category did she fall into? Hunter or hunted.
Still his contact was accepted, cherished even despite the rocky ground their relationship stood on. A nice and fucked up one it was too. He loved her and she loved him back but she also hated him because he loved another, she hated him again over for tossing her aside yet she'd sleep with him in a heartbeat if he ever offered regardless of how it would damage her and tear at her heart to see him go back to his other afterwards. Then there was the danger zone that was his brother, she didn't even know what to classify that as. Everything was so royally screwed up in so many different ways.
He wanted her here? It was nice to be wanted for once. He brushed against her and the touch was returned if only in a small way. Her head pushed back gently against his, accepting and complacent for the time being. Mentioning of the gods and their games had her teeth flashing at the fire, aimless and misplaced anger,
"Sometimes? The gods are always cruel, always ruthless and always mocking. They are not content to see me suffer from the evils already performed upon me, they insist on loading me with more and more." The pale fae knew what she was talking about, experienced laced her voice that was heavy with bitterness. Ears folded back against her blonde hair, the roots were beginning to show through the dye now, she couldn't care less. Where had the woman who seemed so carefree and happy gone? She was bound now, bound and gagged. Left in a darkened room to rot and descend slowly into madness.
The man shifted again and an inquisitive audit perked up from its slumber to follow him around, even within her despair and sorrow did his presence command her attention. She could no more resist the desire to follow his movements than she could her attraction to his fur coloring. Warmth flooded her that had nothing to do with the fire and everything to do with the furry chest now pressed against her back, the arms that encircled her and the head laid on her shoulder, she leaned backwards into the embrace that he dangled before her and gave herself over to him, allowing herself to pretend just for now that he really did care. Did she have strength enough to carry on after this night, to go through her life knowing that she had once again failed and that any notion of her being a good mother was shot to pieces. She could see them all, a plethora of bodies that paraded themselves past her vision, she knew every face, every scent by memory and she would never forget.
Instead of answering his declaration, it would never hold true in the light of day, she asked a question of her own despite already knowing the answer, rhetorical but still questing for a reply,
"I've never told anyone about my history. Where this whore comes from, how she got here." Her face twisted into a mask of pain as loathing filled her words, she couldn't deal with it on her own anymore, she needed to share it. After all this time keeping it contained, the hatred and anger had started to fester and decompose, it hurt and she knew it always would. The injustices done to her would never fade from her life and disappear just like the scars she carried would never heal, carved into her by force and evil. When she was young and stupid she had thought herself very special, gifted even when she had been worse than useless, she still was in fact. To this day the woman had never learned to hunt for herself.