even if your heart would listen

[Geneva Stockholm]

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Was there a way to even explain the conundrum of a deafening silence that had drowned out the sound of even her own heartbeat inside her head? She felt dead inside, empty and utterly still of anything but the sweetness of the rain mingled with the bitterness of her faults. She blinked slowly, her eyes sinking to the floor. But she couldn't keep her eyes away from Anu's face as her friend lowered herself to the ground, so close yet so far. She kept her distance, and Geneva didn't know whether to be pleased or to scream for her to come closer. Indecision was just salt in her wounds, and she grimaced as these thoughts raced through her head. But Anu's blue eyes were gentle, and didn't demand answers though there was urgency in her tone. She found that that look alone had loosened her tongue, and she felt cool air on her dry throat as she spoke quietly. Her words were soft, like the wings of humming bird, and her words didn't have any particular direction. Hopelessness laced her tone as a sense of being lost to everything but those blue eyes set in, bone deep. "Have you ever been so utterly...when you're too tired to move...and each breath..." The wolfess shook her head and swallowed, closing her eyes briefly as she tried to collect her thoughts. But when she opened her eyes and her mouth to continue, the words that came still weren't a succinct answer to Anu's question. "Have you ever realized that, despite everything, you're just a body...just a few precious fluids in an envelop that's so easy to break..." her voice cracked around the word. Beaten. It had been her first fight, but it left her so utterly shaken she didn't know how to move forward from the defeat. She had had her ass handed to her, but more than that she had come face-to-face with her own mortality. Geneva wasn't afraid to die, but the insignificance of her own life loomed so close. She had known that each and every life was precious before, but she had never felt so frail before in her life. Brennt could have snapped each bone in her body, spilled every drop of her blood, and walked away like it was nothing. Nothing. She was nothing.

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