i don't feel the same

[Phoenix]

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Danke. I always enjoy your posts as Kansas as well. It was difficult going on without Iskata. Phoenix had come to see his mate as an extension of himself—and now he felt incomplete without her by his side. Sometimes at night he thought he could feel her presence in his dreams, but he didn’t know if it was their psychic rapport actually connecting them… or just his imagination stimulated by wishful thinking. But when he just now admitted to their son that he missed her, it was the first time. He tried to put on a brave face in front of their pups because they relied solely on him for strength now. But he also relied on his children for strength. Without them and the rest of a pack he didn’t have a reason to go on. Dedicating his life to the benefit of others had always been his preferred way of coping with loneliness. When he busied himself with the welfare of others he didn’t have time to think about his own troubles. He feared the day that he lost such reasons to go on, but if that ever happened he would just have to find someone else to help. “Shiftin’?” he repeated with a laugh. “I thought you were gonna ask me ‘bout somethin’ else.” He was slightly relieved, but he would have to have that discussion with Kansas and Icarus inevitably. Ember would have to get it from someone else, possibly her older sister. Phoenix didn’t know exactly what to tell a little girl. “It don’t hurt at all… might feel a little funny, ‘specially your first time, but it don’t hurt. You should be able t’shift by now… but some wolves don’t do it ‘til their a year old. I was ‘round your age when I first did it, if I remember right. Moon did it when he was a little younger’n you.” he had used his telepathy to help Deirdre master shifting young… but he wasn’t sure if he wanted to indulge his other children that way. Phoenix was glad to help his progeny, but this was something that was best mastered on their own. “Try it. Shut your eyes an’ concentrate on makin’ your body stretch out. Let’s see what happens, eh?”

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