11-04-2011, 01:35 PM
Xd bahaha mental breakdown time 
Now Matteo gets to play hero :3
5+
During her monologue he pulled her tighter but she didn't mind, it was nice. She wondered how she had suddenly become so mellow towards him, where had that anger and frustration gone, the burning hatred. It had died with her son she thought perhaps. She didn't have the energy to hate anymore not to do much of anything. The woman sighed gently. Her blue eyes fell onto the spot where her son now lay, burned away to nothing, she felt like she should explain herself, explain why she had cremated him and the other three,
"I burned him, and the others. I didn't want anything to find them and eat them." Her voice was tight and choked and she pressed a hand to her face, trying furiously not to let the tears overwhelm her, she was sure that once she started she would never stop. She couldn't help the small sob that escaped, the vindictiveness with that she had thrown his own words back at him at an inappropriate time had vanished completely, all that was left was the bitter emptiness like a hollow cavern that still echoed with screams, she felt his face press against her neck, heard his whine and felt the urge to hold him,
"I know, I know. I'm sorry too, I didn't mean that." Now that she had caught onto the word, she couldn't let it go,
"Yes, it would be nice to be able to take care of myself for once, thank you." Sorry, sorry, sorry. It reverberated around her mind and she couldn't get rid of it, its filled her up until she wanted to shout. It started as a gentle whisper but soon became all to audible, what was she sorry for? Everything, it came out in rapid succession, the monotonous wall caving under he emotion,
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry for everything! It's all my fault, all of it. Everything is my fault. I'm sorry your children died, sorry I wasn't a good mother. They're dead, all of them and its because of me. I should have protected them better, I should have killed him." The poor damaged girl leaned forwards now, breaking his embrace and grabbed hold of her large ears pulling them down in despair, nails sinking into skin and drawing blood. Still she remained dry eyed while her mind collapsed in on itself under the strain, guilt consumed her up from the inside out,
"I should be dead, instead of them. I should be dead now. Yes, that's where I should be, dead with them." Without really knowing how suddenly she was on her feet and walking with determination towards the fire. She would kill herself and that would make everything alright. Then she could be with her children, her babies, if she were dead she would go to the same place as them, she was sure of this. She wanted to be with them, she had been a mother since she was seven months old, she felt all of the mother's love and protectiveness but there was no one to return it, as far as she was concerned, as far as she could understand it, nobody had ever loved Gemma Sawtooth.
Now Matteo gets to play hero :35+
During her monologue he pulled her tighter but she didn't mind, it was nice. She wondered how she had suddenly become so mellow towards him, where had that anger and frustration gone, the burning hatred. It had died with her son she thought perhaps. She didn't have the energy to hate anymore not to do much of anything. The woman sighed gently. Her blue eyes fell onto the spot where her son now lay, burned away to nothing, she felt like she should explain herself, explain why she had cremated him and the other three,
"I burned him, and the others. I didn't want anything to find them and eat them." Her voice was tight and choked and she pressed a hand to her face, trying furiously not to let the tears overwhelm her, she was sure that once she started she would never stop. She couldn't help the small sob that escaped, the vindictiveness with that she had thrown his own words back at him at an inappropriate time had vanished completely, all that was left was the bitter emptiness like a hollow cavern that still echoed with screams, she felt his face press against her neck, heard his whine and felt the urge to hold him,
"I know, I know. I'm sorry too, I didn't mean that." Now that she had caught onto the word, she couldn't let it go,
"Yes, it would be nice to be able to take care of myself for once, thank you." Sorry, sorry, sorry. It reverberated around her mind and she couldn't get rid of it, its filled her up until she wanted to shout. It started as a gentle whisper but soon became all to audible, what was she sorry for? Everything, it came out in rapid succession, the monotonous wall caving under he emotion,
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry for everything! It's all my fault, all of it. Everything is my fault. I'm sorry your children died, sorry I wasn't a good mother. They're dead, all of them and its because of me. I should have protected them better, I should have killed him." The poor damaged girl leaned forwards now, breaking his embrace and grabbed hold of her large ears pulling them down in despair, nails sinking into skin and drawing blood. Still she remained dry eyed while her mind collapsed in on itself under the strain, guilt consumed her up from the inside out,
"I should be dead, instead of them. I should be dead now. Yes, that's where I should be, dead with them." Without really knowing how suddenly she was on her feet and walking with determination towards the fire. She would kill herself and that would make everything alright. Then she could be with her children, her babies, if she were dead she would go to the same place as them, she was sure of this. She wanted to be with them, she had been a mother since she was seven months old, she felt all of the mother's love and protectiveness but there was no one to return it, as far as she was concerned, as far as she could understand it, nobody had ever loved Gemma Sawtooth.