02-22-2012, 08:43 PM
Everything seemed so distant now, the world, the air within it, and even the air she breathed. Everything was so dull, and painted over with a gray demeanor that Insomnia found much of this life had been stripped into a nothingness that was probably going to become to much to bare. Indeed the lady had considered suicide, and despite it being far out of the question a few months ago, it seemed now a high possibility. Perhaps it was merely the season, the season of new life, the season of couples happily creating a family, and knowing that somehow she would never had this, made Insomnia even more depressed than she was, if it were even possible. None could love her, none could love a broken being such as her.
And even though Insomnia had her own remorse for knowing she may never be gifted with a family, she could only smile down on those who did. It must be a marvelous feeling; young ones brewing within their mothers’ stomach, growing and kicking… it had to be so warm and comforting. Thinking of names, wondering what they may look like, what their personality would be, and if they would… love their parents. All of these thoughts Insomnia was sure was accustomed to being a parent; yet she could only guess. Her guesses were vague, and despite wishing them vivid, she knew the cold truth of the facts and for this, she only suffered further.
It would seem her heart was just as stubborn and shy as her own mind; it did not desire anything new, for it had already grown so attached to the ebon male with those glorious blue and green eyes. Insomnia would have liked to believe that you only loved once, but was that the case? Was the tender love she felt for him only a practice for something more? Was that even… possible? Her eyes slowly descended downwards, staring at the ground before her as she moved forward. The pads of her paws were freezing, and she was surprised they hadn’t given in and fallen into a bloody mess by now. Lately, Insomnia found that walking until she fainted was a method of comfort for her, it brought her solace and for that, she’d barely stopped walking to configure where she was for… hours. It was only slightly passed mid day, and yet considering Insomnia had a tendency for waking before the sun was even up, she was not surprised at this. Yet, the glare of the suns bright rays off of the pure white snow was almost blinding to the lady, and for this, she lifted her eyes to stare forward, being greeted by a marvel all its own.
Staring at the beauty nature had placed before her and she even felt a small lift of her lips as a smile, tempted, but did not last, on her features. Her fur, that greatly mocked the darkness of the night was slightly dripping with a few flakes of rain that fell from the cloudy, grey sky above. Winter had always been one of her favorite seasons, aside from the fact that it killed off most of the healing moment, a silent moment, there was bliss and she saw him. Shadow her love. She heard him before she saw him and sighed. He shouldn't have found her. "My love..." All she could say was that. She turned and faced him but did not run at him which was strange. All her emotions were so mixed up that she couldn't.
And even though Insomnia had her own remorse for knowing she may never be gifted with a family, she could only smile down on those who did. It must be a marvelous feeling; young ones brewing within their mothers’ stomach, growing and kicking… it had to be so warm and comforting. Thinking of names, wondering what they may look like, what their personality would be, and if they would… love their parents. All of these thoughts Insomnia was sure was accustomed to being a parent; yet she could only guess. Her guesses were vague, and despite wishing them vivid, she knew the cold truth of the facts and for this, she only suffered further.
It would seem her heart was just as stubborn and shy as her own mind; it did not desire anything new, for it had already grown so attached to the ebon male with those glorious blue and green eyes. Insomnia would have liked to believe that you only loved once, but was that the case? Was the tender love she felt for him only a practice for something more? Was that even… possible? Her eyes slowly descended downwards, staring at the ground before her as she moved forward. The pads of her paws were freezing, and she was surprised they hadn’t given in and fallen into a bloody mess by now. Lately, Insomnia found that walking until she fainted was a method of comfort for her, it brought her solace and for that, she’d barely stopped walking to configure where she was for… hours. It was only slightly passed mid day, and yet considering Insomnia had a tendency for waking before the sun was even up, she was not surprised at this. Yet, the glare of the suns bright rays off of the pure white snow was almost blinding to the lady, and for this, she lifted her eyes to stare forward, being greeted by a marvel all its own.
Staring at the beauty nature had placed before her and she even felt a small lift of her lips as a smile, tempted, but did not last, on her features. Her fur, that greatly mocked the darkness of the night was slightly dripping with a few flakes of rain that fell from the cloudy, grey sky above. Winter had always been one of her favorite seasons, aside from the fact that it killed off most of the healing moment, a silent moment, there was bliss and she saw him. Shadow her love. She heard him before she saw him and sighed. He shouldn't have found her. "My love..." All she could say was that. She turned and faced him but did not run at him which was strange. All her emotions were so mixed up that she couldn't.