everything used to be so perfect

Selene Vansenza · 03-17-2012, 05:27 PM

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Hadley, by the Casa borders,

Leaving simply gave that wretched grey woman to advance on her beloved. Maybe taking off was simply a bad idea. Her arms had scabbed over, her bloody habit ceased for a little while. She had gotten support from friends, yet still felt unprepared for the inevitable coming pain of seeing Isa around Hadley. A wave of nausea roiled in her stomach. This was certainly fate. Selene wasn't meant to be happy with someone she loved. Sure, once happy with a man who didn't want her. Sel was aware she was acting ridiculous, yet Isa had broken the secure link of trust between herself and the mottled man back at home. As the cold breeze ruffled through her pelt, the young coydog couldn't help but shudder. All day she had prepared herself. Prepared for the painful goodbye to the one she adored. Often, her head would whip around to watch for the devilish and cruel woman, the one that had taunted her and threatened her. Shattered her soul and taken the pieces remaining. She had to speak with him though. Seek out the man who had apparently been unfaithful. Did he really have a soul? After the horrendous amount of "I love you"s and all the promising herself to him? She didn't simply waltz out and fuck around with guys, thinking of herself as Hadley's. Maybe the truth was, she wanted to be his. His only. Yet: Hadley didn't want her. Of course he wouldn't. She was just a little girl. Worthless.

How stupid she must have been! The laughingstock of Isa and Hadley's. She could imagine the man sitting with Isa...Their bodies intwined laughing about the things Selene had done, her stupid fucking innocence. Finally, Sel finally vomited in the bushes, forcing out whatever scraps of food she had consumed earlier. Even eating had become a tragedy. Never able to keep it down. Wiping her mouth, the young woman carried on.

Her feet wouldn't lift themselves off the ground, tied to this stupid worthless existence she now held. He was her existence. He was her way of life. Yet, unfortunately she had been nothing but passing game for the hybrid. Turning her sorrowful head up, the acclaimed lost soul spotted Hadley close by. Wandering closer, Sel didn't meet his eyes but spoke out softly, painfully as if a dagger had slipped itself into her heart. "I heard you didn't want me anymore." Scarlets averted themselves to the ground at her feet, her now-scarred body tense as if he would suddenly tell her to leave. She wanted him goddamnit! She wanted him to be her mate, her lover and everything else. But not someone who would tell her over and over again that he didn't want her. If he had told her that he wanted to go out and screw Isa, that wouldn't sting as much. It wouldn't be as horrible as the actual action. Instead he did. Hurt her. After the times he said he wouldn't. Sel choked on bile as she thought of Ismeme. The woman she had once entertained as a friend. No. Not anymore, and sure as hell not soon. "You care for Isa now, don't you?" The words that slipped her maw were unexpected, but all that riled up hate for Isa and the stinging and aching betrayal Hadley left her, what other way was there to go?

Selene longed to reach out and touch him, remind him how many times she'd die just for him. A choked cry escaped her lips, instinctually moving towards him. "To the end, Hadley...I'll care" Sel didn't care if he heard her or not, choking out the truth. Her expression became strangled, torn between darting towards the trees or staying with him. Gashed arms wrapped themselves around her body, attempting to hide the hideousness and everything she was from the big hybrid. He must like Isa's type anyway. Not some scared shitless little girl. Not once did she raise her voice, keeping her head down and away from meeting the eyes of brown. Whispering, softly as caninely possible, Sel murmured "How... You said you cared for me--W...Was that not true?" Sel looked ready to erupt into tears, hot angry and betrayed tears. Again, her small body trembled as if going to shatter in some wave of sorrow. She hated Isa! How could anyone do this?

Scarlet eyes swam, I've stayed yours all this time...Because I cared...Couldn't you see me try so hard? Didn't you see that I would hurt myself for you? This was it. This is what she was terrified of so many times, so many times she had told him this was her fear. Shadow had told her Hadley and herself "Were made for eachother" yet that didn't seem so true anymore. How ever fricken much she wished for it to be that way, it never was. Finally the young woman looked up to meet the eyes of her lover, her mortal executioner. Simply, she just shook her head and stepped towards him. Sel couldn't believe the pull, the magnetism around him. "Hadley..." No, this shouldn't be allowed of the chocolate hybrid, Isa had already shattered that. Stolen and devoured what was left of her soul. Looking away, her weak legs slumped to the soft ground, kneeling almost brokenly. Another reason to pass her by. So melodramatic. A coward she was. If wished, she could leave the coming evening. Leave her things behind, especially Hadley. Tears dripped into the soil at her feet, small fingers traced lines in the softened earth. How could Ismeme shatter this part of her so easily? Just a flick of her cruel fingers and some batting of her eyelashes, her world was torn apart. Large ears flattened, tail curling around her small form. He said he wouldn't hurt her! He asked for her to be his lover! Did he have a collection of women as lovers? If so: Sel couldn't be Hadley's anymore. The dagger at her waist slipped out, holding the cold metal in her hands. She contemplated cutting her palms again, distracting herself from what killed her so much. Instead she just threw the thing into the trees behind her, watching sadly as her way out disappeared. Slowly, the small woman stood, moving to stand about a foot away from his body, hands reaching to caress his face, realizing her mistake, they pulled back to hang limply at her side. "I'm sorry for being so inefficient...A burden to you...There's not a man in the world that would care for me--I can see why..."

cause when a heart breaks, it won't break even

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