ooc:
It was difficult to deny that it was love that made the mind weak like this. She knew what manner needed to be taken with this dog rutting fool, and yet faced with him now, she could not bring herself to do so without great difficulty. The anger within did not waver, quite opposite it burned more furiously as he spoke of no love for a dog. Love had nothing to do with it. Had he shown affection to a mongrel what remained of her heart would have been naught but dust. It came down to the physical, the act itself that carved the defilement so deep that even with the purge, she still felt tainted. Would it be enough for the Ancestors to forgive her?
His touched nurturing but felt akin to grating claws against delicate flesh that the whole of her body flinched and she drew away. The dominating thoughts peeled back her lips from trembling gums and teeth. Disgust bubbled from the dank pit of her stomach and settled in her gullet. She dare not look at him to see the concern that his voice conveyed less she risk spilling the embodiment of her hatred upon him and the ground. “Were you this kind to Thana?” she growled softly. “Had you told her of your rut with a dog before or after you mated with her? Or was her self-respect lacking that she did not care where your loins had been? Did her acceptance of that shame make you assume I would too?” With each word her anger became all the more apparent. Her eyes wide and ears drawn back, but she made no move to advance on him outright. She was not yet finished…and truth to told, she hadn’t the strength to attack him.
“Or…or did you just not tell her!” she yelled. “Concealed it like you tried to do with me! Let it sit! Let it fester! And hope it would go away. YOU LIED TO ME JADEN! I asked you…I ASKED you was there anything else between you and that mongrel bitch! And you said NOTHING! NOTHING! AND I TRUSTED YOU!!!” The large golden form had been reduced to a crumbling pillar of red and umber falling from the stone. Exhausted but angered, she slipped from her stone and found solidity on the ground but could draw no strength from it. There she felt truly weak as the conditioned calm of the Exultare dwindled to nothing and she was bared as a naked female deprived of her control. “…I trusted you. I had to learn from another what you had done….because you could not tell me. I carried on in ignored…was made a fool…because…what? Why? By the Ancestors Jaden, tell me what you could have possibly been thinking!”