Sadness and rhyme, These are the times
These are the memories.
We find a way, Pushing through the day
So speak to me gently.
sidenote; ... no blood here...
Smoke billowed from her nostrils, each breath drew in chilled air that burned her lungs. The bright day’s wind was calm and quiet, leaving her to the peace she sought. It was an endless journey and a hopeless task. There would be no peace for the mortal, her age wearing on her tired bones. Her chest was quiet, numb and cold as it had been for days. Such a burden the pain had been, but as she moved through the stagnant air it was a friend that was missed. A note that reminded her that she was more then just the walking dead, or floating through a dream. There was nothing like the feeling of her empty chest. It could have been described as calming, and the lack of pain peaceful. But it was so unfamiliar that Anu felt her core was suddenly foreign, an alien to her. The pain, the beating gunfire of her heart was a symbol, and with its silence that part of her had slipped away. Gone for what felt like forever.
She couldn’t do it. Anu couldn’t keep going on with her feelings beyond her own control, a run-away automobile hitting everything in its path. She had totaled so much and the damage was irreversible, or only fixable with more time then she was sure she had. Part of her was certain she wouldn’t live long enough to see the pain resolved. Though words with Savina had made her stronger, there was always Naniko, their love was something Anu clung to, but the words that passed between them seemed decades old.
Finding strength was becoming an impossible task. But there was an alternative that was much easier to obtain. It was the façade she wore, a mask that had never been present before. Though fake it molded to her form, becoming a second skin. The false sense of power allowed her to stand strait, dried all tears from her face and even gave her a smile to wear. To any that truly knew her, she might have looked off, different. But it could also be mistaken for new confidence. It wasn’t right and completely unnatural for Anu to pretend to be something she wasn’t, but if she was ever to get beyond the losses she had suffered and right the wrongs that she had caused, she would need to find a way to wake each morning.
Mindless stride brought her through the large front door and to the kitchen, where she would try to make herself useful. Utensils and pots were manipulated in her hands as she focused on what they true proper uses were. None of it came easily, but her new self worked with them until the water was placed into a pot with the spuds she had found in a bowl under the sink drowning inside it. Blue eyes looked down on the sinking potatoes, their tan color fading into the shadow of the deep pot. As much as she wished for it, the large vegetables mixed with water didn’t seem to work. Rescuing them from the icy liquid, the fey lined each on the counter and took up a knife. Its wide blade glistened in the light’s raze, and it’s handle felt heavy in her hand. Looking down at the sharpened knife, sky hued eyes traced its edge. The strait line brought her gaze to inside of her arm, locked at the delicate curve that connected to the hand that held the vegetable. Gripping it tightly she watched as tendons drew guidelines. With a swift motion the knife took aim and cut.
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