Futoji (critique him!)

[Ookami]

Name- Futoji

Gender- Male

Age&&Birthdate- 15 Months, November 28, 2009

Luperci- nope!

Apperance-Futoji has bright blue eyes and a white face. He has a black line that comes down in between his eyes from a surrouding black frame of his face that consits of his ears as well. He has black mixed with a little brown fur from the middle of his neck down to the tip of his tail. The 'overcoat' reaches down to his stomach. His underbelly is a creamy-white color. The same color covers his legs and comes up from his stomach, in between his legs and onto his chest.

Biography- Futoji was born to a kind mother and father. He lived the life of luxury for his parents were the Alphas. He was trained as a young pup for a warrior. He could cover ground fast because he had a sleek body and big paws that assured swiftness and balance. However at 3 months old he was in a fight that changed his life forever. He broke his left front leg which now walks with a limp forever and gave him a big scar that has faded but is still very noticable. The limp greatly affected Futoji's quickness and swiftness so his parents knocked his rank down to Omega. Even as an Omega Futoji trained himself, he worked with the limp instead of against it, so now the limp only affects his swiftness and quickness a little bit. His parents were unaware of his self-training however, so his rank was not raised.

At 6 months old Futoji was chosen to be an escort for others and his ranking skyrocketed back up. One day he was chosen to escort his sister to the lagoon for a drink and swim. While there Futoji was attacked by a big wolf that had his sister in his eyes. Once Futoji was knocked on the ground the wolf ran for his sister. Futoji fended off the wolf but his sister drowned in the lagoon. His parents were heartbroken but admired Futoji's bold and brave attitude for the wolf was much much bigger than him. His rank once again however was lowered to Omega.

At 7 months old Futoji left the pack. About a month later his pack was raided by the same wolf's pack that had met Futoji at the lagoon. The wolf was searching for Futoji, but finding out he was gone made him angry. He attacked his brother who barely managed to get away, his brother's whereabouts are now unknown. Futoji didn't know though about the raid of his pack and continued living by himself for over a year. He had settled down by a flowing lake and a deer abundent area. The wolf who had been at the lagoon attacked him one day about 3 months after he found the area and Futoji ran from this home. He travled for four months before he found the Soul's land. Now he is here to stay.

Personality- Futoji is a normal sized wolf. He has bigger paws than normal and muscle is packed onto his sleek body. He has quite a few scars decorating his body. Each a milky white that stretch various lengths and widths. He is very alert and will often scan the area, watching out for preditors or threats. This is a bad habit he has, a useful, but bad in the sense that some could take as he is bored with them or not listning. He is trying to break it by just smelling the air or listning with his ears.

He is a very kind wolf but can be strict towards the ones he loves. He is very hesitant when it comes to others putting themselves in dangerous situations but never hesitates to put himself there. He is quite the dare-devil. He can be snappy at times if he is in a bad mood but if he is in a good mood or a nuetral mood he is very nice.

He hates to see people hurt unless it's himself. He loves it when other wolves help each other. He is a caring wolf and will put other's saftey first before he even thinks of his own. His weakness is dark and deep waters, for his sister drowned in a dark lagoon. Because of this he normally constructs some sort of lake or river that is not deep and is perfect for fetching water from. If this is not possible he brings as many wolves as will come with him just to fetch a drink of water. However he loves lakes and rivers. If the water is flowing he has no problem with it. If it is a secluded area though just filled with water you will never catch him going into it or close to it without wolves by his side.

[Jace Wolfe]

Futoji sounds like a good strong character, he has realistic flaws and weaknesses as well as strengths, all around sounds like someone Jace would be happy to know :3

[Kaena Lykoi]

I like his description a lot! Sounds like he looks a bit like a husky. :> Is he a dog hybrid, maybe?

One thing -- if he was born February 2009, he'll be nearly two years old. If you want him to be 15 months, he should be born November 2009. ^_^;;

One thing I do want to point out -- if he walks with a limp, his injury should affect his balance and speed to some extent. :> You could consider either removing the limp (maybe instead of a limp, he has a nasty, burly scar there) or perhaps stating that his speed/balance is affected, but not to an extreme extent? :> That'd make a bit more sense to me -- I mean, if he limps, it does affect him in some way. ^^;

I like his fears and that he doesn't fear all water, just deep and still water. Interesting to give him a fear like that! It does seem that there's a long timespan between him leaving his original pack and him coming to 'Souls, though; maybe you could consider having him live at home for a while longer, and leave for 'Souls a bit later? It's plausible that an 8 month old could survive on their own, I'm just thinking, from the time he's 8 months old to the present. :o Of course, if you're going to adjust his age, 7 months isn't a very long time on his own. ^^;

Another thing I do like is the possibility of his brother showing up later -- maybe you can post him as an Open Character and have fun plotty times, eh?

[Tayui Aston]

He sounds pretty interesting so far! Though, I would caution against killing off the entire pack -- a lot of people do this to provide a reason for a character to leave their home and write in a dramatic backstory. I think you have reason enough with Futoji's sister's death to serve as a catalyst. Her death could make him resent his pack and choose to leave on his own accord later on without the melodramatics of killing off an entire pack. I did that when I first created Tayui and regretted it two years later.

His appearance sounds interesting, but not really realistic. You could make him an arctic wolf with a white face and a cream and brown pelt otherwise. Though, the spots sound a little... spotty (I am so punny )

Also, this is a small style critique, but you only need to use a comma when you have a new idea. For example, this sentence does not need the first comma and it should be broken up a bit:

[Gabriel de le Poer]

Though going off the idea of spots, you could keep those if your character used dye on his fur. However, you'd have to explain how he learned to do that and where he got the dye from--as well as maybe a reason for doing such a thing. If, for example, he wore black in mourning of his sister then you could explain why he has black on his fur. A lot of cultures use face paint, so maybe check around to find one you like. Check out our guide to dyeing fur for some more details on a more how-to guide for the dye.

[Kaena Lykoi]

Mel, Futoji's not a Luperci. ;~; Unless he had Luperci friends around all the time to help him dye himself, I don't think it'd work to have him dye himself. D; I still think playing a dog hybrid would be the easiest way to achieve a coat pattern similar to what Futoji's got. ^^;

[Ookami]

Thanks guys!
Just one question, so the spots that you are talking about are they the rings?
When I said rings I meant like around his entire body, like it starts on his side and goes up over his back, under his belly and back to where it started. If that still kind of put there then that's fine, I just wanted to clarify.(:

[Gabriel de le Poer]

Duuur I totally missed that. Thanks Sie.

And yeah, even with "rings" like that you wouldn't be able to find that pattern naturally. Unless he was a Luperci there would be no way to have rings circling his entire body, and even then it would need to be done with dye. A dog hybrid would allow for face markings of some sort, but that would also depend largely on what breed you'd want to use. ^^;

[Kaena Lykoi]

For his coat pattern, maybe brindle? It isn't quite as dramatic as what you want, and it wouldn't be feasible in black and white -- merle (blue-gray) and white would be, though. This guy from that page shows a pretty good example, I'd think. Maybe with some dark streaking along Futoji's back and shoulders from wolf heritage, you could get somewhere similar to what you want. ^^; I do agree with Mel, though -- dramatic rings around a character would require them to be an Optime and proficient with dyes. Which, you could totally do! Is not that hard, the fur guide Mel showed would be a good place to look.

[Ookami]

What if I change it to just a black mixed with some brown, I don't know exactly what its called, like overcoat thing with a creamy-white underbelly.

[Ookami]

I fixed everything up.! How's this?

Apperance-

Futoji has bright blue eyes and a white face. He has a black line that comes down in between his eyes from a surrouding black frame of his face that consits of his ears as well. He has black mixed with a little brown fur from the middle of his neck down to the tip of his tail. The 'overcoat' reaches down to his stomach. His underbelly is a creamy-white color. The same color covers his legs and comes up from his stomach, in between his legs and onto his chest.

Biography-

He broke his left front leg which now walks with a limp forever and gave him a big scar that has faded but is still very noticable. The limp greatly affected Futoji's quickness and swiftness so his parents knocked his rank down to Omega. Even as an Omega Futoji trained himself, he worked with the limp instead of against it, so now the limp only affects his swiftness and quickness a little bit. His parents were unaware of his self-training however, so his rank was not raised.

At 7 months old Futoji left the pack. About a month later his pack was raided by the same wolf's pack that had met Futoji at the lagoon. The wolf was searching for Futoji, but finding out he was gone made him angry. He attacked his brother who barely managed to get away, his brother's whereabouts are now unknown. Futoji didn't know though about the raid of his pack and continued living by himself for over a year.