The Return Of Shadow.

Shadowfang · 03-14-2012, 09:20 PM

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OOC text: I Have returned and this takes place a little over a month after the death of Amy's pups. Shadow ran off and needed to be alone and while he was gone he fought bears, cougars and mountain lions, basically wanting a death wish. He will need friends to help him threw the mental and physical torture and pain that he is living with due to his decision. | WC :: +000

The wind blew like a never ending roar of cold and ice. The snow hit him hard but he ignored it. He looked out with cold , blue and yellow eyes from within the pelt and hood made from a black bear that he had killed while he was away. He had his sword strapped onto his back but it was wrapped in the pelt of a mountain lion and he also had some pelts of some dear and a cougar that were all wrapped up and tied to the sword like a makeshift backpack.

He growled low as he thought about the past. It was still fresh in his mind, The death of the pups by his hand. He had killed many creatures but never before did he ever think that he would have to kill pups. He opened his eyes after the brief but painful thought and he started to walk forward now down the snow covered slop towards the base of the mountain where the caves to New Dawn were.

He climbed down slowly, at first he was able to walked down the angle of the mountain but then he had to use his hands and knees and then it finally required him to jump from ledge to ledge until he was far enough down where the snow couldn't reach and he was able to trust his footing knowing he wouldn't slip anymore. He grabbed onto a tree and used it to slow his fall as he jumped from a ledge he was on and his claws acted as brakes so that when he landed on the ground it would not harm him. He landed making a loud thump from all the weight he had on him and he then stood straight up and looked around and he smelled the air and he picked up someone.

He had been gone for so long that he no longer remembered the smells of his own pack and when they would see his eyes they would know that his lack of social graces wasn't due to disrespect, It was due to the pain he had within. He wasn't the loving carefree, beast with a heart anymore. The love was there and he would love to see his friends but he wouldn't act the same until the pain in his soul was taken care of.

Shadow looked in the direction of the coming wolf as he was clad within his many pelts and he didn't even thing that who ever met him first might not know who he was at first glace and probably even first smell due to it being a little over a month.

Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!' Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'

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Insomnia · 03-14-2012, 09:56 PM

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Hurpin'Durp. /+000

Doubling back across the expanse, she chose to go in a more southern direction this time to see if the same results would be given. Another shoreline, another dead end. But she had not quite reached the very end before the scent of borders began to flood her nose. After a few days of wandering the scent of salt finally began to recede. She paused letting the morning sun warm her fur in the midst of the cool springish morning
Thoughts drifted back to the days as an adolescent and the few moments she could spend time with friends. Her and a few buddies had run up the cliff side early spring to get a good view of the things that were beyond the shoreline. Every so often as the temperatures rose, a chunk would fall off and send water flying. Massive waves crashed against the shoreline and the bellowing of cougar unsuspecting along the beach would always get the teenagers chuckling. Cougars were fun from a distance, but they knew better than to mock close, because she would get more hurt than she had already been inflicted with. She sighed and looked at the scars she could she. A long cut ran across her shoulder and she knew her face had deep scars that would probably stay there forever. She shook her head and continued walking. She saw the wolf the same time it noticed her. She had absolutely no clue who it was, what it wanted or why it was so far into new dawns lands. She shook her head and walked forward, feathers that xy gave her hanging down from her ear. "Um....Hello? Who are you?" Her voice was sadly singsong.

Shadowfang · 03-15-2012, 11:42 AM

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OOC text | WC :: +000

Shadow looked at her from under the pelted hood and he remembered a time before his pain and suffering. Insomnia...she had feathers on her now and scars. She had fought most likely after he had gone to be alone to try and collect himself. His eyes looked to her every curve and strand of dark hair and then they finally landed on the eyes of the wolf before him.

He slowly reached up and grabbed each side of the hood he wore and gently he pulled it back showing his head and his mismatched eyes to his mate. After showing her who he was he would have smiled if he had remembered how.

A name is for someone who deserves it...I have no such right, If you have to call me something then call me by actions. Demon, beast or monster work well for what i am.

Shadow wanted to cry, be held, loved again like in the past but the pain in his eyes spoke of a battle within his very soul. In leaving to be alone and gather his thoughts he had left Insomnia, his friends and his pack. He has spent the night with Insomnia before he left and he held her close and loved her as deeply as he could before he woke the next day and told her he needed to travel.

He didn't explain why, just that he needed to travel and try and clear his head and his conscience. Looking at his love now he wished and hoped for her to run at him like she had done in the past and jump into his arms, he only wondered if he would be able to smile at her if she gave him one. I missed you....

Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!' Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'

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Insomnia · 03-15-2012, 12:40 PM

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Insomnia

I'm out on the edge and I'm screaming my name like a fool at the top of my lungs

OOC: ... || WC: 000

So many thoughts clouded her mind as the wolf took off his cloak and showed his eyes. It was her shadow.She looked down, tears were starting to form but she would not cry. She was stronger than that now. She knew that he would of eventually showed back up in the back, and probably have a good reason for leaving her but still. She couldn't look at his eyes. "H-hey Shadow...I missed you to..." She slowly walked up to him and nuzzled his face and neck. She really had missed this stupid boy. Once she got the scent of him she crinkled her nose. He smelt horrible, like death, sadness and pain. It was obvious that he had gone through some trauma but she didn't want to question him, his attitude had surely changed so she didn't know what he would do. "You smell....horrible!" She smiled a bit and sighed and backed up at bit to look at him more. He had pelts still covering the rest of his body but his face and neck so she couldn't tell if anything had happened to him. She looked down at her paws and licked them, such as a cat would do.

sometimes when I close my eyes I pretend I'm alright but it's never enough

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Shadowfang · 03-15-2012, 01:35 PM

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OOC here!

Shadow closed his eyes and he let her get close and nuzzle him and he very gently nuzzled back but there was a reluctance to do so, not because he didn't love her but because he didn't know if he could ever be that large scary yet loving beast again. He let out a small breath as he smelled her and took in her scent and he held it in the breath to make sure to study it properly. She had fought and grown as a woman and part of the pack. That was easy to see.

He watched her eyes as they scanned him and he almost wanted to hide but rather than hide he reached and grabbed the pelt that was covering him and he untied it from himself and placed it on the ground and when he did his body now told a story. There were cuts from cats and bears alike down his back and arms and his chest. His dark fur hid them better than when they were first made but still some light pink scars could be made out in the right light. He removed his sword and pack and when he heard her say that he smelled bad he nodded.

I'm Sorry....I needed time to think, time to reflect on my actions. I'm happy to see you and I'm truly happy to be home.Shadow took a step to her and held out his hand and once it was taken he slowly pulled Insomnia into him and wrapped her in his strong arms as he closed his eyes and tried to think of good times. While he held her he had a flash of the past, he saw himself holding a sword and swinging it at Amy's pups and then the vision stopped. He pulled away from Insomnia and placed his hand over his face as he tried to push the memory aside but he was hurt and needed help.

Shadowfang

Insomnia · 03-15-2012, 01:47 PM

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OOC here. /+000

I'm Sorry....I needed time to think, time to reflect on my actions. I'm happy to see you and I'm truly happy to be home. She shook her head mentally at that. He wouldn't had left her with no reason or explanation. She had to live with pain now that he could never figure out, she would never let him see her feelings that way again. She looked at his scars and traced her "fingers" over them. Why would he go and get hurt? Why, why why why why. All the time was that stupid three letter word. Why. She got pulled into his arms and she held onto him as tight as she could without hurting him. She would have to deal with this now. As he pulled away from her, her face turned to utter disgust and pain. "Did I do something wrong?" She backed away from him. He was different that was for sure. Not the same Shadow she fell in love with that night. This was slowly becoming a stranger.

Shadowfang · 03-15-2012, 02:02 PM

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OOC text | WC :: +000

He looked to her face and saw the look in them and he knew that his actions were for nothing. Even his love saw him as a monster now, if could not be hidden and he could not be forgiven. He turned away and went to grab his pack and sword and pelts as he looked in the direction of the coast. He was going to leave again. She would not love a monster and there was nothing he could do about it. As he picked up everything and started to put them on he spoke, more to the trees then to anyone else.

I can't be forgiven for what i have done....I am a monster, a demon, I can understand if you no longer love me. I'm sorry....I have failed you and didn't keep my promise that i would always be there...I do not deserve life, only death.

Shadow saw again the pups before him and he growled as the image of them whimpering and wanting help weighed on his mind and body.

I did things....I killed....pups....In order to save another soul...but I have killed mine. I love you Insomnia.

Shadow picked up everything and started to walk away from the den and away from Insomnia. Shadow was wounded and needed to be healed before he could ever be the same wolf she had fallen for.

Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!' Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'

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Insomnia · 03-15-2012, 02:10 PM

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OOC here. /+000

She watched him pick up all of his stuff and whined. She did not want him to leave again. She couldn't handle it and would go off the edge. She took a step forward but stopped as he spoke. "I can't be forgiven for what i have done....I am a monster, a demon, I can understand if you no longer love me. I'm sorry....I have failed you and didn't keep my promise that i would always be there...I do not deserve life, only death." She now had tears rolling down her black cheeks. Why did he think that?! He wouldn't be a monster--and why did he think that she no longer loved him. She came back to this god awful place for him. She could of stayed where she was, continued being abuse, beaten and unloved. But she left for him. "Sh-Shadow I..." But he cut her off with a growl. "I did things....I killed....pups....In order to save another soul...but I have killed mine. I love you Insomnia." He did what? Killed..? How..he promised. "Shadow, stop. If you do NOT STOP THIS STUPIDITY..." She growled and crouched down and pounced ontop of him and bit his ear. "Shut up. If you think I don't love you, than your a idiot." She growled again and sat ontop of him.

Shadowfang · 03-15-2012, 02:23 PM

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Shadow had turned and Insomnia's words were a blur to him. He couldn't focus on anything other than his past. He was lost like a pup without parents and he needed a wake up call. He had his back turned and was not ready for the pounce and when it came he went down and turned landing on his back and he looked up into her eyes. without any control over it, he saw her eyes and the tears there and they spoke to him.

He thought about his promise and all at once he was hit by his foolish actions that he had taken. Right before her eyes he started to slowly cry and all he could do was look up at her and speak a single word that meant more than anything.

please.....

That single word was a cry for help, a cry for love and for everything that she could offer. He needed her he needed his pack and he needed his friends. He had never asked for help before and in all respect didn't think he knew how. But "please" was his cry for that help. He wanted to curl up and die, to close his eyes and forget everything but fate would not be so kind. He breathed hard as the tears rushed and he tried to look away from her eyes only to have her reach out and make him look at her again. His anger and pain and hate and all his emotions were trying to leave him through his tears but tears could only do so much.

Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!' Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'

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Insomnia · 03-15-2012, 02:47 PM

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OOC here. /+000

Clouds warned her like omens but she continued and looked down at her mate. The wolf was already so close, but Insomnia was not unfamiliar with testing his boundaries and breaking every single one of them. She turned his head to the side, letting her nose catch the musky cologne of the ashen creature before her. It was sharp sort of scent, but not entirely repulsive. Like cinnamon this male flooded her nose and brought her into a dim sense of alertness. Insomnia's eyes watched Shadow. She held the gaze for a moment, pausing as though to question whether or not her next moved would be a safe one. But what the hell? Any reaction the creature gave would be one that she would welcome. Leaning closer, Insomnia parted her lips and loosened her tongue upon the male's muzzle, curling it from the far back corners of jaw to the wet, leathery texture of his nose. "I...can still save you..." She didn't know what to say now. She winced at the pain of her own wounds but it really didn't bother her. She would tend to him first, as always. He needed someone now more than ever, and she would be there for him. "I love you, Shadowfang."

Shadowfang · 03-15-2012, 03:11 PM

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Shadow took the lick and gave a whine as he leaned up and nuzzled into her neck and it seemed as though his heart and soul were screaming for help from his love. He would never leave and not come back. If he ever were to leave the pack he would take Insomnia with him of at least give her the option. He saw the pain on her face for a second and knew that her wounds were bothering her and he wanted to help the moment he saw the pain. He took her hands in his and brought them to his chest as he looked her over and his tears still came.

I don't know if I can be saved but if anyone were to try I'm glad it's you love. I love you too and I will keep my promise...I wont leave..I just need time and help with everything.

Shadow rested his head back and blinked his eyes hard to try and stop the tears from coming and then as he lay there he reached out and touched Insomnia's cheek gently and then he brought her close and planted a soft and gentle kiss upon her lips and he remembered when they had first kissed long ago, next to the lake of New Dawn. He had no worries then, no pain, no stress. Now he had lots to stress about and plenty to think about to bring him his pain but at least he still had his dark angel to help him through it.

Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!' Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'

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Insomnia · 03-15-2012, 05:56 PM

ry as she may to part herself from this heartbreak, her paws would not let her have another step more as he began speaking. Turning herself deaf to his nonsense was near impossible. Her ears would not obey the command to mute his lies and mouth would not open to command his silence. It was her fault for believing something more could transpire; her fault for hoping he could love her as she had come to love him. But in the end, the ghost of his past would have his heart.

Yet she had meant so much to him… he wanted to be with her. The possibilities of their future dashed with each past tense, breaking her resolve down even further. Her formidable mass nothing more than a shambled mound. “Stop talking,” she mouthed with her back still to him, but no voice made the words sound. Again she tried, and again there was nothing, only the whine of bitterness for her own foolish hopes dashed to the frigid winds.

Her body was trembling like a frail leaf, her resolve all but gone, corroding under the acidic emotions threatening to bubble forth. They were brimming now just under the surface, the restrain bringing tears to her eyes as she fought with herself not to cry. Words stricken with pain continued to bombard her, his tearful confessions bearing down til they were more than she could stand. "Tell me than.... who.. were you with all this time.."

Shadowfang · 03-15-2012, 06:51 PM

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Shadow looked her in the eyes and dropped his arms and let his body just lay there. She had asked a question and he would answer. What followed wither it be her attacking him or leaving him, he still would answer her because he loved her. He took a breath and looked her right in the eyes and spoke truly and calmly.

I was with Amy and her pups. I owed her a dept that bought me this sword. She needed me and i went to help. When i got there I saw her trying to kill her own pups. I knew there was good within Amy so I took the burden onto myself. I killed her pups so that she could continue to exist with what little good was left in her heart. My dept is paid and I no longer have to heed her call.

I am free from her but the decisions I have made, I am not free from. They haunt me and curse me every second of every day. I came back because I need you and the pack. After I killed the pups I left. I spent that last night with you before I left for a little over a month. I needed to Meditate and be alone with my thoughts. I thought I could force the feelings from my mind but i was wrong. I need help...I've never asked for help...But I need it now...Please forgive me.

Shadow's body remain unmoving as he looked up to her awaiting some kind of wrath. Shadow hoped she would understand but he knew she hatted when he was with other females friend or no.

Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!' Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'

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Insomnia · 03-15-2012, 07:30 PM

Her steps were swift, able to move now that she had forsaken her farce and at last let her emotions flow freely. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she rounded to him, muzzle snapping vengefully but a hair’s width from his own. “If you love me, then why would you leave me for her!?” she shouted, unable to bare this pain in silence any longer. “I have been there for you… I have cared for you… and I love you, Shadow… Why would you dismiss that for her? Do you love her this much that you would forsake what we have? The future we can have together?” Threatening growls escaped as she lunged forward in a calculating manner, teeth grasping his cheek and she pulled.

Shadowfang · 03-15-2012, 07:55 PM

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OOC here!

Shadow saw the bite and with all his assassin training he could have dodged, moved, countered or blocked but he did nothing instead. He couldn't raise a hand to the one he loved, he let the teeth sink into his cheek and he gave a whimper as he kept his arms and hand at his sides. The tears came now, not of the pain or of the pups he had killed but the blame of being with another woman. He looked her in the eyes and spoke as best he could even with his cheek being bitten into. Pain came through his words and he hoped she would hear him because it wasn't something he would be repeating.

I never had a mate, before you. I've never loved, before you. I've never kissed, before you. I still haven't even had pups...I did nothing to or with Amy that would make me unfaithful. I came to a friend in need and helped her kill her own pups....I KILLED PUPS!

I would die before cheating on you, I would take my own life before losing you. I would sell my soul to the devil if it meant I would get one more moment with you. I came back, event though I'm a a monster and I came back for you and wanted your help....and you accuse me of loving another....

Shadow could think of nothing more to say. Only moments before he had thought that Insomnia his love would be the one to help save him from his own pain but now she had attacked him too. He wanted her to just take his sword and run it through his heart because his had just cracked and at this rate it might as well be ripped out.

Shadowfang

Insomnia · 03-15-2012, 08:32 PM

Reason won out over defiance in the end. Though her heart was breaking and the very fabric of her resolve was frayed to nothing, she still grasped onto the single thread of reason and rationale that kept her from deafening her ears to her beloved. There was no sense in hiding the tears any longer, no point in keeping the Lagratan resilient face. There was only her and him, set at the troubled crossroads of this ill fated relationship.

Yet, amidst all the drama and tears, his words gave her hope. So desperate to latch onto something that was theirs, she took hold of his words and believed them to be true. He did love her… he wanted to be with her. She was the future he wished to have had the Fates been kind enough to deal them a blessed hand. And that filled her with hope… hope that in this lifetime they would see the fruition of these trials and no longer has to bare this existence alone. She stopped biting him and slowly licked when she had inflected the wound. She whined and whined over with each lick, once and a while she would lick his lips or nuzzle his good cheek. ".....im sorry..."

Shadowfang · 03-16-2012, 01:20 PM

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Shadow whined lightly and licked her back on the muzzle as he pushed his face into the scruff of her neck and he spoke softly and with feeling.

You have nothing to be sorry for, I left and ran when i should have stayed and came right to you. I'm sorry. From now on if I ever need help with anything, I'll come to you first. I want us to be perfect together...I don't want secrets or lies stopping us from truly being together. I want to have a family with you one day and in order to see that dream come true I would do anything. If there are any questions or anything that you want to know about my past or anything at all, I will tell you. I am an open book and I am yours, from now tell always.

He leaned up and kissed her on the lips and held the kiss as his hands hugged her close to him. He wanted her to know that he loved her and he wanted her to know that he was hears forever.

I would wear a sign or carve into my very flesh that I belong to Insomnia, to you, if you asked it of me. I don't know what I can do to prove that I am serious about you and want to be yours always, If you asked it of me i would do anything...just tell me what i can do to prove my love...please...

Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!' Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'

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Insomnia · 03-16-2012, 01:30 PM

She nuzzled into him and kept licking him. She took what he said into consideration. He really loved her, wanted to have pups with her one day. No one else had wanted that before with her. She wasn't the most beautiful wolf in the lands, but than again that didn't matter at all. She looked down at him and smiled as he kissed her and pulled her into him more. "Sh-Shadow...I..I am sorry. I am selfish and get to jealous easily..It's in my nature. You would to if I had done the same thing.." Than she heard him say that he would mark himself and she gasped just a little than smirked. He would scar himself for her. Her name on him, his name on her. This wasn't natural but than again, they weren't either. She slowly got off of him and sat in front of his bags. "Lets do it than."

Shadowfang · 03-16-2012, 03:06 PM

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Shadow looked to her and he sat up as he moved closer and then he looked at her and he held up his hand and he held his pointer finger out and the claw came out being black and razor sharp and he looked her over and spoke lightly If you really want to mark one another then you should mark me and then I'll mark you. Where do you want me to put my name so that other will know that you are mine? He watched her closely and waited for her to tell him where she wanted his name to be and once told he slowly got closer and he took his claw and dug into her flesh and wrote out a symbol that meant shadow and then after he was done leaned down and licked it clean and kissed it lightly as he looked into her eyes lovingly.

And you may place your mark here.

He slowly took his finger and pointed to his chest where his heart would be and he reached out and took her hand and placed it on his chest as he leaned in and kissed her passionately.

I want it on my heart so that you know that it and I belong to you forever, for as long as you'll have me.

He waited and watched as she took her claw and started to cut into him like he had done and he made no movement or sigh of pain, he watched lovingly as she placed her mark and her ownership onto his flesh.

Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!' Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'

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Insomnia · 03-16-2012, 03:19 PM

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OOC here. /+000

She smiled at looked up at him. They were actually going to mark each other. She would never regret this now. "If you really want to mark one another then you should mark me and then I'll mark you. Where do you want me to put my name so that other will know that you are mine?" She looked down at her right thigh and smiled. She hadn't need to say anything else because his eyes followed and he knew. Than his claws dug into her flesh and she whined and bit her tongue. She closed her eyes and once he was done she looked down and smiled. "S-shadow.." but she was cut off by his kiss and her arms instantly went around his neck. Once they stopped, she pulled back and looked at his chest. She would mark him hers for life now. So with her claws she dug into his chest and made to sweet deep letters 失眠. She kept carving and carving into him until it was perfect. Once she was finished, she lapped up the blood and kissed him once more.

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