I am not talking to myself, I swear!
She'd felt like something inside her was missing, the near moon that she'd spent in the lands of Inferni had left her with embers of hatred hiding under a bed of ashes waiting for life to be breathed into them once more. Slowly over the last week of her imprisonment she'd felt her body begin to change but the numbness that had begun to weather her spirit had kept her from realizing the truth. Now she was within her own lands, a week gone by since the exchange had taken place and her freedom felt again.
She didn't know why but she'd ran, the first moment she was out of their grasp she'd run and hadn't looked back. She'd gone crashing into the woods like a wild child, not caring where she went or what happened when she got there. She hadn't come to see the packmembers when they'd come calling at her den and she'd avoided their scents and presence when she could. Her body may have healed but her mind and spirit was broken and brittle, the child just couldn't handle what she saw in the eyes of her packmates, what she thought they saw.
No one knew what had fallen upon the child in the span of time she'd been confined in the clan's lands though they could probably guess and anything their minds could imagine was probably correct. Firefly had been roaming the woods for days, her coat filled with burrs and briars, her normally silky pelt dull and unkept, obvious signs that the girl wasn't well.
She'd come to the edge of a meadow and her emerald orbs lifted from their normally downcast glance as she caught sight of a form she knew too well, a form that had come with her golden eyed friend to find her in the lands of Inferni. Their time spent on the coast that day had been short and she'd only caught a glimpse of DaVinci the day she'd been returned, right before she'd been set free and had run ragged through the lands like a rabbit with the wolf on it's tail. A soft whine broke from her throat as her defenses broke and the babe within went galloping across the grasses to come crashing into the hammock where they hybrid had been resting. "DaVi!" she cried, the sobs breaking the few words apart as the small frame of the girl barrelled into the hybrid brother's chest.
DaVinci had known that his kid sister would find him when she was ready, she always had. He'd spent his time wandering the lands and finding out souls, new and old. His mind was troubled from the runin he'd had with Laruku, half dead laying in wait for eternal sleep to comsume him it seemed. DaVinci hadn't really known what to think, he had never lost someone who had once been part of his life. Sure, on the seas he'd witnessed sickness take souls but he'd never been close to any of them that had passed by... though he really had never had a chance to know the older carmel hued hybrid he could remember times when he'd been a hate filled heathen child and still after all the trouble he'd caused the male had been there to pick the pieces up even when he didn't have to.
He'd been lying back in the hammock with his long legs stretched out and his arms behind his head as his eyes watched the clouded blow past through the small clearing. The boy had once more settled into his luperci form, breaking the habit he'd grown into, but at times he found that the world seemed clearer when you could stretch out and just let life past you by, and life always seemed to flow so much freely when give the chance in this form. Life and death had always walked hand in hand but he'd never really given the thought of how close they were linked til now. He sighed and closed his eyes as the quiet world encompassed him with his lids closed.
Suddenly the steele furred male found himself with the breath blasted from his chest as the small form of Firefly had finally found him. Tangled in the hammock it took him a moment to wrap his arms around the small girl as he realized that she was sobbing and crying in his arms. He almost found himself in a panic as he tried to hush the girl, laying soft kisses on her brow as he murmurred in that deep comforting voice. "Shh.. Firefly, Firefly.." he cooed in her ear. Somewhere in the back of his mind a voice called out, Some Outlaw you are.
Small hands were wound tightly in his fur as she curled up into a ball, trying to make herself as small as possible, trying to make herself into nothing. She felt the warmth of her brother's arms around her as those salty tears crept into his pelt and lay damp trails along his neck and chest. The voice crooning in her ear was the same one that had been there so many times before when their adventures hadn't gone as planned. He'd always been able to wash away the sadness and bring the sun out again but this time there was nothing but rain pouring down upon her heart.
Her fists beat out a rhythm on his shoulder and chest as she screamed and cried, the pent up fury from the injustice she'd gone through had finally hit home and just DaVinci's luck. The arms that held her so tightly reminded her of how Haku had held her once, no games, no teasing play, just the honest emotions shining through. She knew DaVinci wouldn't let her go once she'd found him but as she raved on her words actually became coherent. "Hate you, Ah hate chu'all.." the muffled words were burning hot on his neck as she let the pain take over, abandoning the child in the lap of the last soul one would assume could love such a creature so deeply.
The screams and sobs that burned his flesh as the tears soaked his pelt were nothing in the hybrid's eyes as his arms enclosed the tiny lady, knowing that she'd been hurt in someway he had yet to understand but like always he was there to pick her up and set her on the path she so loved to run full force down, no mind to the traps that may or may not pull her down again. How he'd come to be a gentle soul to the girl after seasons of boiling hate and anger at a world he couldn't understand and one that didn't want to understand him was beyond measure.. but once more big brother was there.
The harsh words that struck like a slap across his face were met with more soft words, his heart breaking as the lass lashed out with everything she had. "No, no.. It's gone, it's done.." his deep gentle voice seemed to fill the space around them as he ran his hands through her hair, soothing the tangles and teasing out the burrs and briars as he spoke to the small woman child in his arms. "It's just me and you, like it use to be..." He rained gentle kisses on her forehead as he let her beat away on his flesh. He'd taken worse before and he'd take it again and again if it could bring the dark little spirit back into the world.
The words settled around the cold that was eating away at her, the numbing poison that had filled her mind and soul with self loathing and fear. The scent of her protector and those arms that had always held her and mended every cut and scrape, every bruised knee and banged up elbow seemed to make it all start to fade slowly but surely. Her eyes were filled with a deadly passion as she screamed, the sobs breaking up her hate heated words as she tried to break the only soul there was to hold her. "You left me.. left me!" her claws dug into his flesh as her ears folded back against her skull, the rough hands upon her pelt making her skin crawl as they teased and tested the tangles and burrs, doing the job she'd abandoned since her release.
Suddenly it seemed that the job was even abandoned by DaVinci as her tears seemed to double and the screams were replaced with weak whimpers and whispers. She had let herself grow numb to the actions of the clan member that had taken what she hadn't offered. She was no innocent sweet soul but a dark seducer when she wanted to play but caged bird's can't fly and she hadn't offered her gifts freely to the beast that had come calling when the leader's back's were turned. Nuzzling herself as close as skin she didn't want him to let go, the wounds were long from healing and she'd run from anyone else who would have offered open arms.
He bowed his head as she screamed the truth at him. He'd left her, he'd let her go knowing she was just a babe still. He'd let his two sisters run across the lands not knowing what would fair them.. it was just that he'd return when the world had come crashing down upon the child, caused by her own hand or not it didn't matter. She looked up to him for guidance.. he was the big brother, her friend in adventures and the protector of the small. His homely looks dulled even more with her dark beauty, so opposite from one another and yet still she clung to him, not ready to let go, not ready to grow up. "I know." he admitted sadly, his heart aching as those words repeated over and over again. He should never have let her follow Magdalena back home, he knew she wasn't ready for the world he'd come from.
The screams seemed to sink into whimpers and moans as she finally stopped fussing upon his flesh, the fresh marks from her claws vibrant red against his steele and silvery fur as her whispers seemed to cause the pain to blossom fresh in his heart. He'd done her wrong, he never should have said yes when she'd begged to go back with Magdalena.. but of course she'd had him wrapped around her finger since forever and a day. How was he to say no to those dancing emerald eyes and the mischievious smile... and he hadn't, and now he regretted it more than ever.
The words she muttered and whispered into his fur as she weeped her heart out for the second time in mere moons. Once to a man she never realized she loved so much and now to the one heart she'd stolen so long ago. She beat her hands weakly against his chest as the worst of her fit had begun to die down, the passion of her fears and hatred for the male who'd taken her without a thought. More than that, the fury at the truth that had blossomed in her womb, the seed he'd planted that had begun to grow and flurish with no care to what she thought of the life she was being forced to carry.
The thought of the truth as it bit at her mind and taunted her, flaring the pain and anger again as she whispered, "I don't want them.." the moan in her voice whining over and over again with the choking sobs as she whispered over and over again like a broken record. "don't want them.. can't want them.." her voice weakening with every run over and over again until they died away.. the exhaust from her outbreak taking hold as she crashed, her slight weight curled around the form of her brother as sleep, long since avoided finally stole the babe away to dreamless slumber.
He hadn't caught the words the first time she said them and his cooing and crooning had faultered when he realized just what it was the baby girl had spoken into his throat as his raised his head away from hers and stared out into the summer evening that was closing quickly around them. A darkness seemed to creep into his soul as he realized with a cold dawning what she'd said. Gently wrapping his arms around her waist as she fell into a dead exhaust the male could feel the slight bulge that was growing over her normally flat abdomen. Baring his fangs to the coming night the gentle big brother could hear the voice in the back of his mind again, calling and taunting. "So, outlaw.." it rang out as he closed his eyes on the fury that was boiling in his soul.
Tears fell hot from his lids as he bit his lip to keep the rage at bay. He'd let her escape and she'd fallen into the hands of a monster, like the monster that had spawned him. He'd vowed once to protect her, to keep her from harm.. and he'd failed. Tightening his hold on the child who was too young to be a mother, still just a kid herself he felt his heart breaking. He'd let this happen, his own kid sister, a dark little beauty with a dangerous heart.. he knew she'd get herself hurt oneday... but he'd never imagined it would have been like this. He wouldn't let it happen, he couldn't. She didn't want them and he wouldn't want her to have them, not like this, not at the hands of a monster.
He opened fury filled eyes, knowing he was a monster, holding a babe that was blinded by love, unable to see what he himself was.
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