[html] http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j40/k ... efinal.png);background-repeat: no-repeat; padding-bottom:140px; background-position: bottom center;">Open to any well-wishers who want to keep bedside vigil for Phoenix, but this is mostly an introspective thread.
Weak, helpless and prone—such was the status that Phoenix could not have afforded himself to be in since he was a blind, squirming pup. Ever since then, his father had tried to teach him to be strong and perfect, and life had molded him in much the same fashion after it had taken his father out of the picture. Even after reuniting with his own kind he could not allow himself to show a moment of weakness, especially after becoming Alpha. Yet now he lay in the pack den, trembling and totally unaware of the world around him. He was barely even conscious of how he had gotten into such a state—but he knew that the little girl, the member of his pack, was safe. That was all that mattered.
Despite the odd shudder, Phoenix remained immobile in his seccui state. Sometimes he looked almost peaceful if not for the rapid movement of his eyelids. His mind, however, was a whirling maelstrom of memories as Phoenix struggled to maintain the spark of life within himself. He dreamed:
***
He was a large pup, larger than any of his siblings. Papa said he might even grow up to be bigger than mama, and she was huge! Of course, Phoenix loved to lord this over his brothers and sister at first, which didn’t make mama happy at all. “Son,” she told him one day, “Just because you’re bigger, doesn’t make you better than anyone else. In fact, as the biggest it’s your job to watch after your siblings. Do you understand? He didn’t at first, but he nodded anyway, When mama used that tone he knew she was saying something important, and he better listen. But he stopped picking on his brothers and sister after that, except for the occasional prank he and Chicago would pull on their sister. But she was a gurl—she deserved it.
***
Mama and Papa and Chicago and the others were all gone. The brown pup was all alone in the world, which, as it turned out, was a very dangerous, scary place. Even the other canine, who’d called himself a coyote, was cruel and threatened to kill him. Phoenix didn’t want to die, even if he couldn’t think of a good reason to keep on living. He just… continued to fight to stay alive, out of instinct, maybe. Take today, for example. He could just as easily stop running and let the angry bear behind him eat him alive. But, for some, reason, the boy’s legs wouldn’t stop moving. Finally they did, however, right before leading him off a cliff and down a waterfall. Phoenix looked down into the abyss, then back at the tenacious bear. He had a choice between plummeting into a possible death and being eaten alive—some choice. Finally, however, Phoenix too a deep breath and jumped. He emerged from the waters not long after, cold and shaking but still alive and, for the time being, relatively safe again. | [/html]
[html] before you tell yourself
Gonna be short, because I’m at school <3
it's just a different scene
Phoenix had been getting worse and worse as the days went by, ever since he and Pilot had fought with the cougar. She knew that being in cold water for that long couldn’t be a good thing…but wasn’t much of a healer, herself. There were a few things that she could do, like keep him warm and full of fluids, but that was how far her knowledge went. Maybe they would have to get outside help, from another pack.
Dierdre sat next to Phoenix, making sure that he was all the way covered by the animal skins, to keep him a little warmer. There were times that he felt really hot and times that he felt very, very cold…she alternated between putting more skins over him and taking more of them off. A small fire was going right outside the den, meaty broth bubbling over it.
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[html] http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j40/k ... efinal.png);background-repeat: no-repeat; padding-bottom:140px; background-position: bottom center;">Pack life was a strange new experience. Phoenix had been in Storm for just a few days but thus far he had only caught fleeting glimpses of the other wolves that were a part of this community, and he was too nervous to approach any. What if they didn’t like him? What if they grew impatient with him for being a stupid, uneducated mongrel? He barely knew what it meant to be a wolf, or how he was supposed to act. But at least he was safe from predators, though they hadn’t bothered him for quite some time. And food wasn’t so hard to find. He’d been gorging himself on rabbits lately, tired or deriving sustenance from bugs. Phoenix sat down to enjoy his latest catch when his senses alerted him of another wolf nearby. He didn’t look so good, so after a moment’s hesitation he approached his supposed pack mate and struck a deal with him: he could have his rabbit if he answered a few questions for him. It was an acceptable loss, considering how he’d walked away from the encounter with a little more knowledge of pack life. And, he had this warm feeling inside him from helping the other wolf. He found he liked helping others, and wanted to do it again soon if he could… If only he had more to offer.
***
He had finally made his first real friend—a little girl who, like himself, was an orphan. Her name was Ember, and in just the space of a few minutes she had already shown him more kindness than anyone since his parents. The young male was convinced that hey needed each other—after all, without parents to look after them, who else? She was lucky, though, since she’s said she had a secondary family in another pack… but he wanted to be there for her too, since they probably couldn’t understand what she was going through like he did. What could he do to show her his loyalty as a friend, though? He didn’t know what she liked, so he would share what was most precious to him: food. Growing up he’d been hungry much more often than not, and food of any kind was a rare commodity. Surely she had plenty to eat, but it was the only way he knew how to return the kindness she’d shown him. It took him a couple hours, but finally he managed to catch a good-sized rabbit, which he happily laid at the entrance of her den for when she came home. That night he curled up under a fallen tree with his new blanket wrapped around his body and lulled himself to sleep with happy thoughts of the good times he hoped to have with his new friend. | [/html]
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Pilot felt a mixture of emotions whenever he entered the den. It was a place that most felt at peace and safe. Pilot, however, could only dwell on the fact that Phoenix was now curled near the fire in a seemingly eventful slumber. Often Pilot could see his eyes moving beneath his dark brown lids, and wondered if perhaps he was dreaming of comforting things or his battle with the mountain lion. Either way, Pilot hoped that this wouldn’t be the end for his good friend. Phoenix was his leader, his mentor, his friend, relative, and brother all in one. To lose such a person would be devastating. Pilot wouldn’t know what to do.
Now that Phoenix was out of commission for the time being, responsibility came down upon the white wolf. He had no idea how Phoenix could take the pressure of running the pack. Even before any sort of issues were raised to Pilot, the squirrel raised wolf instantly knew what this accident would mean. As he pulled a rather soggy and limp Phoenix from the river, he had doubts in the back of his mind. What if Phoenix didn’t make it? What if he got a sickness, such as pneumonia (which Pilot didn’t know the name of, but had heard of once before)? All of these things haunted Pilot, on top of the tasks that he would have to fulfill in Phoenix’s place. The pressure was immense. He could understand why Phoenix now always seemed to have so much on his mind – there was a lot to consider.
The Gamma came a long side Dierdre, looking down at the recovering form of his friend. "How’s he holding up?" His hushed voice was almost over taken by the sound of the crackling fire, but Pilot didn’t want to speak too much louder, as if it might disturb the recovering alpha. "I don’t know what we should do, Dierdre. This man’s the one who always gives me advice, and now I’m at a loss. Maybe we should get outside help… find someone who knows a lot about medicines. I just want to make sure we don’t loose him. I’m afraid what would happen to Storm if things even got that bad."
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[html] before you tell yourself
One more post from Pilot, or one from Pilot and a few from some other peeps, and I'll bring Naniko in.
it's just a different scene
Sometimes it was easier for her to pretend that everything was okay...that she definitely knew what she was doing. What if her actions made him worse, and not better? She didn't know what she would do. Physe had left the earth already, and she hadn't been there for him. She would be there for /this/ one of her father's. With that resolution she looked toward Pilot, listening to his words. Outside help?
Dierdre considered this. She really was out of her league here...and Phoenix didn't seem to be getting any better. She nodded, then looked toward the den entrance. "I'll...go see if I can find Selene. She might be able to go over to Clouded Tears and get Naniko. I know that Naniko will know what to do--she's about the same age as me, but the animals that have come over here have been talking a lot about her and her medicine. She's Selene's...sister? I'm not sure. I think they're sisters. So maybe Selene can convince her to come."
She nodded to herself at the idea of it, then started out the front of the den. "Watch him for me? And the broth--it's almost warm enough. There are bowls next to it...maybe you can get him to eat some of it. He should swallow it if you can find some way to get it into his mouth"
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Icarus hadn’t known what to do – his father hadn’t said barely a word since coming back soggy and weak from the river. The chocolate brown boy sat next to the recuperating form of his dad and watched him with sparkling eyes. He knew that he couldn’t cry if he wanted to be strong, but he was just so scared. With mom gone, Phoenix was the only parent present at home. And with the position he was in, Icarus suddenly felt immensely alone. Sure, the other wolves of Storm were there to look after the pups, but Icarus still felt a void that could only be filled by the mobile and lively figure of his father.
He sat close to his side, listening to the sound of the crackling fire and watching his father’s chest rise and fall. Though Pilot and Dierdre were talking to one another, he barely heard the words. Instead, he focused completely on the fallen alpha. When would he get better? Or would he ever? The thought of losing his father was more than the small child could bear, so he preferred to try and avoid thoughts of it.
Whining barely audible, Icarus moved close to his father’s side and curled up on the skins next to him. He rested his small head upon his paws, feeling the minimal warmth from his father’s body. Even if he father wasn’t awake, Icarus felt close to him just by being at his side.
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Sorry it took so long to get to this. Was out of internet for awhile.
Selene lingered outside of the den. It was hard for her to be her bright and bubbly self. Those inside probably blamed her for this. But it was her fault. If she had been paying attention rather than playing around then none of this would have never happened. If she hadn't gotten in trouble then Phoenix wouldn't have been hurt. The days since the rescue the young female had been spending in solitude. She wouldn't even return to the den at nights. At least not inside it while everyone else was there. They all knew that she had caused this. And she had...
She was pulled from her thoughts by movement inside. Her name had been mentioned. Go get her sister? How was she to tell Nani what she had done. But she had to try and help at least. If that meant telling on herself to the only link of immediate family then she would do so. Quickly the female skittered off before she could be caught hanging around outside the den. Way was made to Clouded Tears in order to find Naniko.
Once in Tears she went to her sister's den, hoping ot find her there. Still, along the way, she kept an eye out for the older female. Upon finding her relative Selene spilled the story about Phoenix's fight with the cougar and how he fell in the river. About Pilot, though she knew him not by name, rescuing the Alpha and carrying him back to the den. About how Diedre thought that Naniko could help because Phoenix kept on getting worse. Actually the only that was left out was Selene's involvement. Though the clawmarks on the youth's flank spoke of that for her. Also the way that the pup was unable to look her sister in the eye was subtle hint to it as well.
[html] http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j40/k ... efinal.png);background-repeat: no-repeat; padding-bottom:140px; background-position: bottom center;">The last time he had seen a cougar, he had been a lot smaller… so this one didn’t seem as big as he remembered them. And yet, it looked no less menacing. Perhaps more, considering that it had seriously injured a member of Storm. Phoenix didn’t know who, but that wasn’t important. This thing was a menace to his pack, his family, and his alpha had called on him to help eliminate the threat. Phoenix was nervous but determined to do what needed to be done. He had his doubts, killing a fellow hunter, but this thing had started it and they couldn’t’ be blamed for defending themselves. He didn’t really notice who made the first move—Gibraltar or the cougar—but once the battle was engaged Phoenix forced down any doubt he had and leapts onto its back, doing his best to cause it pain and keep it off-balance so it didn’t injure Gibraltar as he moved in for the killing blow.
***
Nervously Phoenix pulled a few select pillows from his own personal stash and set them aside for his new roommate to use. He sat down, searching Achilles for a positive reaction to his new den. The poor three-legged puppy didn’t seem to know what to make of the whole situation, but Phoenix wanted his new charge to feel right at home. Granted, it wasn’t much, but the Wahrer could easily expand it whenever they needed it. Besides, this was just until the pup got on his own feet—no pun intended—and settled into the role of a full-fledged member of the pack. As nervous as he was, he was also energized—he loved pups, and he loved helping others. Perhaps he had finally found his own niche… He would have to talk to Gibraltar again the next time they ran into each other and ask to be made the pack’s official aufpasser.
***
Who was he? Was he Phoenix, an orphan taken in b Storm, or was he Nirupama Hale, member of Jaded Shadows and son of the valley’s most feared and hated criminal? He was drowning in both identities as he searched the eyes of the other wolf—Hale of Phoenix, he wasn’t sure—and looked into his very soul. The brunneous wolf didn’t know how, but somehow his mind had reached into the other’s and merged with it. And… it hurt, too. Both were frightened senseless, but too overwhelmed, disoriented, and caught off-balance to do anything. It took all of the brunneous wolf’s force of will to recall who he was—Phoenix! I’m Phoenix! —and force himself back onto his legs. Both ran as soon as they could back to their homes, the connection finally being torn by distance. As soon as he was himself again, Phoenix gradually slowed down and sat under a tree, near tears. What had he done? What was he… becoming? | [/html]
[html]When Selene had come to her den she hadn’t known what to think. Sure, her sister visited her from time to time, but she usually hung around the borders before coming in. It was a strange behavior, a behavior that made her wonder a bit. She’d invited the girl inside to talk for a moment, and then, with the girl's urging, started off with her toward Storm. As they walked, Selene explained the problem to her—about the cougar attack and what Phoenix was acting like now. It was obvious that the alpha was sick, but how sick? She’d brought as much stuff as she could carry; in case one thing didn’t work, she could try another.
She thought about more remedies while she walked. In all reality, she would have to see him before she could decide what to use to help him.
They reached Storm after a ways of walking. She didn’t dare run with all the herbs in her backpack…that could make the jars shift around, and possibly break, and the herbs could mix with one another. That wouldn’t be good. So they took a fairly good walking pace. She watched her sibling carefully as they went, noting the claw marks and obvious discomfort. She wasn’t sure if she should bring it up, but Selene would need some help, too. ”I can help you—with those marks. They might scar…but I think they should heal all right if you’d let me bandage them up...after I look at Phoenix we can sit for a moment. I’m surprised that you can even travel—it’s very strong of you. To come all the way to Clouded Tears to get me, when you’re hurt yourself.”
Naniko offered her a smile as they passed the Storm borders, back to Selene’s home pack. They reached Phoenix’s den in a few moments, and Naniko nodded to the wolves that were outside, biting her lip. She wouldn’t think about the complications here; the ‘what if’s’. She would do everything she could, and when she was done with that then they would just wait and see. The green eyed wolf ducked down into the den, going toward the alpha. [/html]
[html] before you tell yourself
it's just a different scene
The others fell in around Phoenix as she backed away, going outside the den. The air out here was cold, compared to the relative warmth of the inside…freezing, really. Dierdre looked worriedly toward Pilot, then to her brother, who was laying beside the great alpha. She wanted to tell them that she knew what she was doing, and that she would be able to help Phoenix…but she couldn’t. She knew only what her mother had told her about herbs and illness, which was a very basic thing. She’d spoken with Naniko about herbs before a few times, though, and the Clouded Tears wolf had been able to answer all of her questions.
The girl saw Selene in the distance and she started to call out to her—but it seemed that the white Storm pup already knew what to do—she was heading toward Clouded Tears. It wasn’t long before she was back, with a large, recognizable female in tow. Dierdre greeted her politely when she approached, moving out of the way so that the bigger wolf could get inside the den. ”Do you need Icarus to move?” Oh my gosh…is it contagious? Icarus—“ She didn’t want him to get it. Or anyone else! ”He’s been like this for…I don’t know how long. Two days, I think. He doesn’t move a whole lot, and he hasn’t woken up. Sometimes he feels really hot, and other times he feels cold to the touch” She wanted to know if there was anything that the Tears wolf could do, but she knew that she’d have to have patience.
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[html]Naniko was glad to see Dierdre there. She hadn’t had the chance to visit with the girl for a while, now, not since before Christmas. They had kept in contact, occasionally dropping by the other’s dens or borders…but not really often enough for them to count each other as close friends. They both had one thing in common, that Physe had, at some point, cared for them during a part of their puppyhood. Been a second father.
She shook her head when Dierdre spoke about Icarus moving, coming in closer to look at the prone wolves. ”He’s okay. I think…since he was in the water, and stuff…here. Let me get out my book.” She reached into one of the side pockets of the backpack, pulling out a small hardcover book, written in French. ”It matches. Pneumonia, at the very least. The time frame matches, too, and his symptoms. The books says that pneumonia is a weakening of the immune system, caused by the presence of toxins in the body. It’s not contagious.. Give me a few minutes, and I’ll read a bit more…see if we can figure out what to do for him.”[/html]
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Pneumonia. Wasn’t that the illness that Pilot had heard of once before? If it was, he knew that it wasn’t good. Glancing back towards Phoenix, Pilot choked down the mouthful of air in his mouth and looked on with worry clearly showing in his eyes. He moved away from the alpha to give Naniko some room and silently hoped that she would be able to help his fallen friend.
Glancing back to the two white females, Pilot remained silent but listened intently to what the Clouded Tears apothecary had to say. "Could it be potentially fatal?" Pilot muttered, hoping that Icarus wouldn’t hear or understand. He flashed Dierdre a reassuring smile, but knew that it wouldn’t be enough to lift the tension within the den. Everyone was on their toes and would be until their alpha regained his bearings.
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She accompanied her sister on the trip back to Storm but seemed rather reluctant about it. She spoke only what she needed to and nothing further. Pale eyes were kept focused on the ground the entire time. She couldn't bring herself to look up. Given the occasions that she had traveled back and forth between packs she knew her way well enough without having to pay particular attention to each step taken. Rather she allowed herself to withdraw again. She didn't seem the same pup that had first entered this place. It had only took a couple of nights to alter her. Where others had tried before and failed all it had taken was her Alpha's illness to cause the change.
Head lifted only enough to look at the marks when they were brought up. Young girl paused a moment to lick at them before ignoring them again. They were rather shallow and wouldn't need much tending to, mostly time to allow it to knit. Only response given was a shake of her head. No, Phoenix needed the help not her. Phoenix was worse off and it was her fault. This was only a small price ot pay for potentially killing her Alpha.
Once back in Storm she showed the way to the den but refused to enter. Rather she tucked herself away where she wouldn't be noticed but could still listen in. She had to keep an ear out and see if he was going to get better but she couldn't face anyone else. Not with the guilt that laid heavily on her heart and mind.
[html] http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j40/k ... efinal.png);background-repeat: no-repeat; padding-bottom:140px; background-position: bottom center;">Though Phoenix was normally a good-natured wolf, there was one wolf he actually did not like: deuce, the crazy female from Syemv. He didn’t trust her, since either she was insane or an incredible huge flake. Both times he’d run into her had felt like glimpses into a world of insanity. And the thought that she had actually had a child… it was scary. Phoenix expected the daughter to be just like her mother, and as she took him by surprise and knocked him over, calling him “daddy,” it looked like he was right. Yet, when she began to weep once learning that he was not indeed her father his heart ached for the unfortunate little girl. He could easy sympathize with such feelings. As she shed tears into his fur he attempted to comfort her, which only led to a stand-off between mother and daughter (with him in the middle) as Deirdre tried to go home with him. Finally Phoenix convinced her that would not be happening, and he told the little girl to reconcile with her mother. As soon as he was free to, Phoenix made a hasty escape and didn’t look back. Little did he know that he would soon come to think of that little girl as his daughter anyway, and she would the oldest of his large brood, both adopted and biological.
***
The massive young male couldn’t believe it. Ever since his psychic abilities emerged he’d lived in fear of being a freak with nobody to understand him. Yet, as he stood before a young coyote (of all creatures), he found he was not so alone as he thought. She could only feel emotions while he could fully read minds but it was still basically the same thing. They were both cursed with an extra sense that they did not want. Faolin provided him hope and relief, even though they still had no idea how or why they could do what they did. Suddenly Phoenix didn’t feel like such a freak. If there were others out there like them, perhaps there was yet a chance that he could understand and control his abilities. By the time they were done touching minds and comparing abilities the sun was beginning to set, and the coyote was reluctant to venture home in the dark. So the two freaks of nature spent that night together in the Haunted Forest, and in the morning vowed to help each other learn about their abilities.
***
The air was as thick as the earth they were moving. Whatever control Phoenix had managed to muster over himself was lost as soon as the last part of her body was hidden by the earth, and he broke down in sorrow once again. All the months he’d tried to be strong and act professionally in front of his pack mates were shot to hell, but he didn’t care. Gibraltar and Skoll, too, seemed absorbed in sadness, but he felt too fearful to approach them, nor did he really want to. Ember had been the closest thing he had to family, and now he had lost her too. If only he hadn’t taken her for granted, had been more affectionate towards her and gone to visit her more often. Now it was too late—he would never see her, hear her sweat voice or savor her scent ever again. She was gone. The world felt dark and empty, and he was alone in the world all over again. | [/html]
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Moon had been sleeping at his father’s side with Dierdre for the entire time, ever since he and Pilot had rescued him from drowning. Moon left the den whenever he needed to, either to gather some food for him or Dierdre, or to just relieve himself and take a bit of a walk. He was always ready to do anything for his father whenever he needed to and would do anything possible to make sure he recovered fully. Whatever happened, though, Moon had made it clear that he loved his father. He had talked to him while Dierdre had gone outside to get some air; he had held his father’s hand and prayed to whoever would listen. His father was sick and needed some help from up above.
He had gone out to get a bite to eat when he noticed that a lot of wolves were congregating in Storm. There were scents from Clouded Tears – that would be Naniko, most likely. Moon hurried off toward his den and stepped inside just in time to hear what Naniko was saying. It wasn’t contagious, which was good, and it didn’t seem to be fatal. Moon took a moment to feel his father’s forehead and blinked. His fever was going down; at least that’s what he thought. “Nani, he doesn’t feel as hot as he did earlier, before I left.” his silver eyes peered at the white wolf, desperation visible upon his face. He wanted his father to live more than anything in the world right then.
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[html]  I even looked this up, lolz. x3 Phoenix will smell funny for a while...
She licked the end of a finger, going through page after page of the book. Pneumonia. Pneumonia. It was in here somewhere. She had to remember that it was spelled with a 'P', and not an 'N'. There. She heard the first question as she flipped back through the book, going away from the index, and she looked up for a moment. "Well...not really. I mean to say...that if I wasn't here there is a chance that he could die from it, from lack of fluids or from degeneration of the lungs. I...think that's the right word for it. I'm not sure. There's a chance that he could get a cough from this, one that, if he coughs too much, could harm his lungs. Make him cough up blood. So after I leave, if he starts to cough up blood, you'll need to bring me back." She would stay long enough to make sure that he was well set, though. She wasn't one to abandon a patient; she would return again the next day to check on his condition, then the next, then the next until he was well again.
Her name was being spoken again, and she looked toward Phoenix this time, to the grayscale wolf that now stood next to him. She'd met with Moon a week or two earlier, and had enjoyed being around him--he was a good friend of hers. "That's a good sign already, then." She said, giving him an encouraging smile. It was good to think, no, to believe that the patient was going to get better. It would help the situation, most definitely. The white wolf started to search through her bag, pulling out the many jars and bottles and setting them on the ground next to her. She knew what to do first...but she had to find the right thing. She opened one bottle, sniffing it, then pushed the cork back in and looked for a different one.
"Aha"She said, pulling the cork out of the next one. "Garlic. Let me get some thickening agent, and I can make a strong paste out of this. It's a popular remedy for pneumonia; the plant is a natural healer."In the next fifteen minutes she concentrated on making the paste, then approached Moon, Icarus, and Phoenix. "Now you'll have to move, sweet"She said to the younger of the two males, pulling back the furs that covered the giant alpha."I'll keep the paste in this jar, so that it can be used without it drying up."She began, speaking to all of the wolves. "You'll need to apply a third of a cup's worth to his chest every four hours. Maybe even a bit more than that; he's bigger than the humans that this book was written for."
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[html] http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j40/k ... efinal.png);background-repeat: no-repeat; padding-bottom:140px; background-position: bottom center;">No! Not more garlic! I’ve been eating raw cloves myself as a homeopathic remedy. It’s not pleasant.
Who did this female think she was? Phoenix could take care of himself, and the feud between Inferni and Clouded Tears was none of his concern. He was not trespassing in the clan’s territory, merely sitting at the border respectfully and waiting for his friend to come to him. Little did he know that his friend had left recently without even a thought of him. But Phoenix desperately needed someone to talk to, someone to understand him. Instead, this arrogant female came here trying to “save” him from the coyote clan. Ironically, she barely looked like she could save herself, considering all her wounds. Finally, however, he gave up hope of seeing Faolin that day, and agreed to walk the Tears female home. Iskata Sadira was her name, and as they walked home he found himself strangely opening up to her, which was odd for him to do with a total stranger. Yet there was something about her… perhaps it was his telepathy, perhaps it was fate (if such a thing existed), but deep down, he knew he could trust her. As they finally parted company, Phoenix felt an odd desire to see her again someday. Who knew, perhaps their paths would cross again, hopefully under more pleasant circumstances. She could make for a very good friend.
***
It was incredible. Phoenix hadn’t been sure he could actually do this with his telepathy, but he was actually granting a blind wolf a chance to see for the first time in his life. It was perhaps just as thrilling, if not more, to him than it was for Zorish himself. Ever since developing his ability Phoenix had lived in fear of it, almost hating himself for being a freak… but now he finally realized that, freak though he may be, at least he was no monster. He was actually using his ability to help another, thus validating his existence. Phoenix, channeling Zorish, took a step further away from the blind wolf’s body, acting on his desire to see his friends and home up close… but that was their undoing. Despite his practice Phoenix was still not strong enough to maintain such a deep psychic connection for so long, and by increasing the distance between them he finally reached his limit. For a minute, his mind was swirling in an overwhelming surge before it finally shorted out, with melodramatic effects. Unable to cope, his mind just shut down, leaving Phoenix an unconscious heap in the sand.
***
All his life Phoenix had survived with one goal in mind: to start a family of his very own, one that he would not lose. For the longest time, he knew he was not ready, but as time went on he grew lonelier and lonelier. Perhaps he might not even find what he was looking for in Storm… none of the females there seemed interested in a strange wolf like him. Phasma, though, was kind to him. Heck, she had even kissed him a few days ago, though he was sure that was more a gesture of friendship than anything else. But, she was kind to him… and she had started out with nothing, just as he had. Perhaps he was reaching too far—after all, she was an alpha, and he was… still nothing. But he had to try, because if he passed up the chance for happiness then he would always kick himself for it for the rest of his existence. He was practically out of it when he followed her inside the Syemv mansion and sat down beside her, his nerves almost imploded under the strain. He was about to admit his feelings when he sensed something… unusual. New life, growing inside her. She was… pregnant? Oh no, she was already involved with someone else. He hadn’t even considered that possibility. Growing distraught, Phoenix excused himself as soon as he could after telling her, retreating before she had a chance to ask him why he really came to see her. Her life was complicated enough as it was without having to worry about the misplaced feelings of a ragtag youngster like him. Phoenix choked back tears as he retreated for home. Maybe he wasn’t meant to have a family. | [/html]
[html]Dierdre watched as the female worked her magic, moving from foot to foot anxiously. Whatever she could do she'd do to help him--anything. She was very glad that they'd been able to get Naniko to come over--that Clouded Tears and Storm had good relations. There had been times before when she'd wondered about the ties between the packs (if Inferni ever became a bigger threat, they'd need to stick together)...it was times like these that reinforced things a bit.
She stepped back so that she stood next to Pilot, putting her arm around him and burying her face in his fur. His scent was comforting, reassuring, flowing over her in waves. [/html]
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i can't stop running away.
He did not yet know the details of what had happened to his father, but the simple fact that something bad had happened sent the creamy boy into a tailspin. He had many of the same feelings as his brother – he didn’t want to lose the only parent still around, one who seemed so strong and omnipotent, at the same time gentle and loving. The boy felt tears pool in his eyes as he trotted into the chamber where his father lay – though, at first, he could only see a few areas of chocolate fur that indicated Phoenix’s presence. The rest of the space was occupied by several others, a few whom Kansas recognized – his brothers, Pilot, and… Naniko?
He recalled their conversation, the one that had made him realize how very connected everyone was. The smart girl was currently flipping through a book, obviously very intent on helping. Kansas immediately felt a sense of relief – though he had met her only once, the boy trusted her. He stood alone in the entrance to the room, bracing himself for her words – all of which turned out to be what he wanted to hear. And Kansas knew that there were plenty of wolves who loved Phoenix enough to take care of him until he healed. Only then did Kansas slip in among his packmates, nosing his way through with a few whispered apologies as he went. He sat beside Icarus, acknowledging Moon with a gentle nod before turning to watch his sick father.
It was so frightening to see him like this. He was in a troubled sleep, his eyes moving rapidly beneath his lids. Kansas looked at his paws; he didn’t want to get in the way, but he just had to be there right now.
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[html] http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j40/k ... efinal.png);background-repeat: no-repeat; padding-bottom:140px; background-position: bottom center;">In less than twenty-four hours, Phoenix’s life had been transformed from the existence of an unimportant nobody into a life of purpose and meaning, fatherhood and leadership. After talking with Gibraltar and seeing him off, the newly-knighted Gamma of Storm returned to the back of his den, where his two new children slumbered lightly. Fears of failure began to surface when he realized all the lives that were now dependent on him. Phoenix didn’t want to fail the wolves of Storm, nor did he want to screw up Sun and Moon while bringing them up and ruining their lives. Of course Phoenix would do his best, but he didn’t know if it would be good enough. Sighing, he picked up the half-finished meat he’d caught for the pups and finished off what they hadn’t eaten, which was quite a bit of food. The commotion disturbed Moon, who whimpered and nuzzled his sister awake. The bolder of the two pups, Sun ambled towards him, with Moon warily behind her. Despite his fears, this was still a happy day—for Phoenix at least—and he never wanted to forget the day he brought home a new life. Struck by a sudden idea, Phoenix shifted back to his luperci form and picked up the camera Gibraltar had given him for the time capsule. There were still some pictures within it, and he’d been saving them for a special occasion. A few minutes later, he had a halfway decent image of his adopted children, something he would cherish for the rest of his life. Once they were back in bed, Phoenix told them he had to leave for a bit but promised to return before too long. Still, he waited until they were asleep before emerging out of his den to make his rounds through the pack territory, only this time as a leader.
***
The massive male had never killed anybody before today. Oh sure, he had ended the life of countless lesser creatures to continue his own—that was the natural order of things. But Phoenix had never taken the life of a fellow wolf before, until a crazed male wandered into their home and attacked his son. Now Phoenix stood over the wolf, snuffing out the breath of life within him and ignoring the slashes being carved in his own flesh. The telepath kept a tight clamp over his perceptiveness, not wanting to experience the life he was taking in its last moments as he had inadvertently done before while hunting smaller creatures. It was bad enough feeling a rabbit die; he didn’t think he could bear the feeling of another sentient being dying by his own hand. Finally, the ordeal was over, and Phoenix shakily got off the corpse. His only consolation was that this wolf had already died in spirit before even coming to Storm… the fact that he held no other option did little to console him. He couldn’t bear to look at the dead body, and instead focused on the trembling form of his son, who was still alive only because Phoenix had slain the other wolf. Scooping Moon into his arms, he began mumbling reassurances into the little boy’s ears, just as much for his own sake as it was for his son’s. | [/html]
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